Lent

mica178

What are you giving up or doing extra for Lent this year?

Last year I doubled my nightly Bible readings.

This year, I'm increasing how often we eat at home and doing religious reading in addition to the Bible.  I just finished the Screwtape Letters and now I'm working on How Now Shall We Live?  

threepinkroses

Coffee. Its the hardest thing I can think of to give up since I work nights and live off of the stuff.

And going to Mass weekly, since I don't make it there quite every week right now.

Calypso1977

i havent thought about it yet.  i might try giving up cheese again... the one year i did that tho it was a miserable fail because everything has cheese in it.

i might do coffee...or chocolate.

[Deleted User]

Coffee is probably one of the most difficult because if you are a big coffee drinker, the withdrawals can be associated to those of a drug addict going through withdrawals. I haven't though about lent yet.

bibliophile2010

I just started thinking about Lent, since it starts so late this year!

I'm trying to really discern what my Lenten practice should be this year. I want it to be much more about spiritual and personal growth than just "giving something up." I suspect it will focus on increased Bible reading, but I want to have a plan instead of something generic like "read the Bible more" which is too easy to let slide.

Last year, I gave up soda, with the intention of making it regular practice. I have done a good job since Easter of limiting my soda intake and really only have it a couple of times a week (instead of a couple of times a day). I also started writing nightly in a prayer journal that really helps me to focus on God, even on busy days.

ootmother2

I've never "given up" anything for Lent as I was taught that doing positive thing for others was something God would view as more important. (no flame to people who give things up for Lent, just what I grew up with)

Because I am temporarily unable to walk without crutches, my donating time at the local homelss shelter is impossible.  I will try to make up for this by cooking more for the shelter as they will pick up.  I can manage my kitchen in spite of the crutches.

When I can go outside, another 10 days, I will go to Mass at least one extra day other than Sunday.

I already have started to make up with my BFF from childhood after a huge falling out we had several years ago.  Her daughter, only 28 , was diagnosed with breast cancer in January and I will call her at least twice a week so she can vent.  She really needs this.  Before our falling out we vented everything to each other.

I will give food to the beggars on the street.  Even if it's just buying a hot coffee and roll.  I don't give cash unless it's a very elderly person, obviously in great need

There's a bible study course (non denominational) on a cable station here and I will watch to learn more about the Old Testament.  Better than watching re runs of CSI, right?    I actually enjoy learning the bible so this isn't a great sacrifice.

I will be extra considerate of my family, siblings included, as they have given so much of their time and love over the past several months to get me through this mess.

I've been making a list of positive things I can do over the 40 days, it's not finished yet and I would be open to suggestions.

mica178

OOT, a couple years ago, I realized that it wasn't hard for me to give up something for 40 days, so I changed directions and started doing extra things during Lent too.  So far, it's usually been extra Bible reading and a little more in the collection basket.  I'm going to try to argue less with my mother during this time too, which will be a great gift to my dad.   Putting H on a diet (thus eating out less frequently) will be a sacrifice on my part and a good gift to H.

newlyseliski

I'm also going to attempt giving up coffee and chocolate!  Guess I'll need to get more sleep  Additionally, I'd like to try to make it to at least one weekday Mass in addition to Sunday and some Eucharistic adoration with my fiance to help us focus as the wedding nears!

agapecarrie

Fasting and abstaining from favorite foods is a practice of "mortification" that is promoted not only in our church but in the Scriptures. It is an unfortunate thing that it has been replaced or forgotten by so many.

The spiritual growth one experiences by purposely being hungry for a bit is amazing. I have a great difficulty at doing it and I notice on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday when fasting is mandatory that it really challenges me, and my prayer is intensified. Not only that, but the penance is offered for our sins, and can be offered for good of others. It's a lot easier here than in purgatory.

ootmother2

mica, 

I just remembered one more.  Lent falls late this year, pretty much in line with the start of the March of Dimes.

M was a very premature baby ( 27 1/2 weeks) and we're always thankful for the March of Dimes and their research in this area that probably saved her life.

I'm calling to see if they need at home volunteers for the drive.  They have in the past so that would be one more positive thing to do for Lent.

Calypso1977

fasting and giving up somethign was definteily promoted in my house growing up.   we were always told to "offer it up".

i do like the idea of promoting generousity and good works simultaneously. 

[Deleted User]

I haven't thought about it yet. I guess I need to get on it. It will probably be chocolate or something.

bibliophile2010

I don't think there's anything wrong with giving things up, especially if you choose to abstain from something that is difficult to abstain from and will encourage you to turn to God to ease the process. Like Agape, I find that my prayer life is heightened on days of fasting and I recognize how blessed I am, for which I give thanks to God.

That said, if giving things up is done merely to fulfill a requirement and is not challenging on you on your spiritual journey or is not a sacrifice, there really ought to be something more, IMHO.

That's why I think giving something up should be combined with other spiritual practices that turn the person toward God and the real meaning of the coming Tridium.

SaraAndrew2010

I usually try to both abstain from something (often a bad habit) in addition to making a commitment to doing something (going to mass during the week, setting aside more time for prayer).  I'm a little stumped this year trying to decide what to do.  DH and I are going on our delayed HM during my spring break from grad school right smack in the middle of Lent.  We're going to be traveling around South America and I know I'm not going to be able to keep a committment to going mass during the week or finding time to say the Rosary.

Hope61

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:2adaf238-e99b-4bf2-aa1d-75c8a21d03e0">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]Fasting and abstaining from favorite foods is a practice of "mortification" that is promoted not only in our church but in the Scriptures. It is an unfortunate thing that it has been replaced or forgotten by so many. [/QUOTE]
Agreed. There are three things to work on during lent--prayer, fasting, and giving alms. I think that to leave out fasting especially leaves out the origins of Lent--Christ's 40 day fast in the desert.

My preliminary plans are--
-Giving up sweets (I have a bad sweet tooth, so this is always a huge challenge). Perhaps fasting on Fridays too.
-Alms... a few gifts to favorite religious groups/charities.
-Prayer... not sure... maybe 20 min. of meditation/mental prayer every day. Its something I'd like to get back in the habit of doing, so Lent would be a good time to make that happen.

rlytton87

I'm planning on spending at least an extra hour a week in adoration & starting to say Evening Prayer again...I've slacked off & it is a good practice. 

clearheavens

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:2adaf238-e99b-4bf2-aa1d-75c8a21d03e0">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>Fasting and abstaining from favorite foods is a practice of "mortification" that is promoted not only in our church but in the Scriptures. </strong>It is an unfortunate thing that it has been replaced or forgotten by so many. The spiritual growth one experiences by purposely being hungry for a bit is amazing. I have a great difficulty at doing it and I notice on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday when fasting is mandatory that it really challenges me, and my prayer is intensified. Not only that, but the penance is offered for our sins, and can be offered for good of others. It's a lot easier here than in purgatory.
Posted by agapecarrie[/QUOTE]

<div>I agree, fasting and abstaining are great ways to bring you closer to God.  The only thing I see is that some people use this like a "New Year's Resolution" to diet, which wouldn't be bad in of itself, <em>but it has to have a prayer component that turns it into a sacrifice</em>.  Or else, it's just dieting.</div><div>
</div><div>I recommend most people (unless they are experienced) to fast and abstain under a spiritual advisor.  You can usually get one from various parishes in your diocese.</div><div>
</div><div>Lent has these components:</div><div>
</div><div>prayer</div><div>alms giving</div><div>fasting</div><div>
</div><div>An authentic Lenten journey should have all of these together to prepare you for the death and resurrection of our Lord.</div>

Calypso1977

I agree, fasting and abstaining are great ways to bring you closer to God.  The only thing I see is that some people use this like a "New Year's Resolution" to diet, which wouldn't be bad in of itself, but it has to have a prayer component that turns it into a sacrifice.  Or else, it's just dieting.

haha, that was SO my motivation the year of the cheese fail. 

ootmother2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:2adaf238-e99b-4bf2-aa1d-75c8a21d03e0">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]Fasting and abstaining from favorite foods is a practice of "mortification" that is promoted not only in our church but in the Scriptures. It is an unfortunate thing that it has been replaced or forgotten by so many. The spiritual growth one experiences by purposely being hungry for a bit is amazing. I have a great difficulty at doing it and I notice on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday when fasting is mandatory that it really challenges me, and my prayer is intensified. Not only that, but the penance is offered for our sins, and can be offered for good of others. It's a lot easier here than in purgatory.
Posted by agapecarrie[/QUOTE]


Under ordinary circumstances, I might agree.

I seriously doubt that even the Pope would advise someone less than a month after serious surgery to even attempt fasting in any way.  As I said in my pp, this is my way of doing Lent, no one else has to agree.

At 5' 8" and 115 lbs, fasting would be harmful to my health as it may well be to others on the slim side.  Sacrifice doesn't have to be through the stomach.

agapecarrie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:fcedc467-f7b6-4fc3-9527-7c20811c86ec">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lent : Under ordinary circumstances, I might agree. I seriously doubt that even the Pope would advise someone less than a month after serious surgery to even attempt fasting in any way.  As I said in my pp, this is my way of doing Lent, no one else has to agree. At 5' 8" and 115 lbs, fasting would be harmful to my health as it may well be to others on the slim side.  Sacrifice doesn't have to be through the stomach.
Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]

Introducing an obvious exception makes no sense, nor does it lessen the truth of what I have said.

One can be very thin and still give up soda and it not be harmful to health.

The truth is the truth, and it is put forth by Christ and the church who says that fasting (many graces achieved by abstaining from certain things) brings graces.

This fact doesn't become untrue just because someone is thin or is healing.

ootmother2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:f7acb2c2-4319-4ceb-8d5e-5521a13035f0">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lent : Introducing an obvious exception makes no sense, nor does it lessen the truth of what I have said. One can be very thin and still give up soda and it not be harmful to health. The truth is the truth, and it is put forth by Christ and the church who says that fasting (many graces achieved by abstaining from certain things) brings graces. This fact doesn't become untrue just because someone is thin or is healing.
Posted by agapecarrie[/QUOTE]

Sorry dear, your opinion doesn't overule my priest's.

judge much?  yikes!

agapecarrie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:cdde48c5-2243-4207-b5f4-5b61d182221c">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lent : Sorry dear, your opinion doesn't overule my priest's. judge much?  yikes!
Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]
um, this doesn't make any sense.
First of all, do not patronize me, "dear"

2nd of all, it isn't my opinon, I'm stating the CHURCH's teachings, and yes, the church's teachings overule a priest's opinion if it is against the church teaching. I wasn't talking about you personally, and I did state there were exceptions...its like you didn't even read the post.

3rd of all, I never ever ever judged your soul. Ever. Do not accuse me of doing so.

MeaghanandMichael

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:0a8fac1c-8120-4af2-a61b-304a175c508f">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lent : um, this doesn't make any sense. First of all, do not patronize me, "dear" 2nd of all, it isn't my opinon, I'm stating the CHURCH's teachings, and yes, the church's teachings overule a priest's opinion if it is against the church teaching. I wasn't talking about you personally, and I did state there were exceptions...its like you didn't even read the post. 3rd of all, I never ever ever judged your soul. Ever. Do not accuse me of doing so.
Posted by agapecarrie[/QUOTE]

A little more compassion and a little less self righteousness may be in order, hmmm? Sure you know your stuff, but it is important to know when to hush in the name of encouraging some one to heal and to have a lenten experience they have discussed with their priest. I can already see you coming back to my post on a high horse and I just encourage (and pray!) for you to restrain and think about compassion over dictating truths. True truth has a way of coming out trough the grace of God and belittling is not truth.

clearheavens

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:fcedc467-f7b6-4fc3-9527-7c20811c86ec">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lent : Under ordinary circumstances, I might agree. <strong>I seriously doubt that even the Pope would advise someone less than a month after serious surgery to even attempt fasting in any way. </strong> As I said in my pp, this is my way of doing Lent, no one else has to agree. At 5' 8" and 115 lbs, fasting would be harmful to my health as it may well be to others on the slim side.  Sacrifice doesn't have to be through the stomach.
Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Canon Law 1252 says that Catholics who are aged 15-59 are bound to the law of abstinence on Ash Wednesday, Good Friday, and all Fridays of Lent.  The difference between fasting and abstaining is that fasting means small meal; abstaining means no meat.</div><div>
</div><div>Canon Law 1253 says it is up to each conference of bishops to set the details for fasting and abstaining observances, make exceptions for certain people, and then describe substitutes for those with exceptions; especially in the areas of charity and exercises of piety.</div><div>
</div><div>I'm just restating more clearly what agapecarrie has said, that 1. fasting and abstaining is a <em>requirement </em>of Catholics as described, and 2. there are of course people who are <em>exceptions</em>.</div><div>
</div><div>For those curious, the US Catholic Conference of Bishops (USCCB) have set exceptions for sick patients (like OOT mentioned), and many others, like pregnant and breastfeeding moms, the list goes on.  The USCCB also describe forms of penance (as OOT appears to be doing) such as works of charity (the soup kitchen, teaching, caring for a friend, visiting jails or the sick), exercises of piety (Stations of the Cross, Liturgy of the Hours, Rosary, daily Mass).  Works of charity, fasting, and abstinence are important throughout the year and not just during Lent.</div><div>
</div><div>The point that the Church and our bishops are trying to get across is that Lent is a penitential time.  You repent of your sins, examine your actions, and unite them with your prayers so that you can grow spiritually, help others grow spiritually, and get ready for our Risen Lord.</div><div>
</div><div><span style="color:#000000;font-family:'Times New Roman';line-height:normal;font-size:medium;" class="Apple-style-span"><em>c. 1252: All persons who have completed their fourteenth year are bound by the law of abstinence; all adults are bound by the law of fast up to the beginning of their sixtieth year. Nevertheless, pastors and parents are to see to it that minors who are not bound by the law of fast and abstinence are educated in an authentic sense of penance.

c. 1253: It is for the conference of bishops to determine more precisely the observance of fast and abstinence and to substitute in whole or in part for fast and abstinence other forms of penance, especially works of charity and exercises of piety.</em></span></div><div></div>

agapecarrie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:c368d49b-c9dc-4575-addb-d8aadf14a5bd">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lent : A little more compassion and a little less self righteousness may be in order, hmmm? Sure you know your stuff, but it is important to know when to hush in the name of encouraging some one to heal and to have a lenten experience they have discussed with their priest. I can already see you coming back to my post on a high horse and I just encourage (and pray!) for you to restrain and think about compassion over dictating truths. True truth has a way of coming out trough the grace of God and belittling is not truth.
Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

And you don't think this was belittling?

There is no self-righteousness in my post. In fact, the first one I admitted how much of a difficult time I had with the practice.

 I did not belittle, I stated what the church teaches. She is the one who was patronizing and accused me of judging...all I did was state the church teaching, and defend myself against the patronizing post, sans emotion.

ootmother2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:611c08af-f8cb-434b-8290-fd6215aeb26b">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lent : And you don't think this was belittling? There is no self-righteousness in my post. In fact, the first one I admitted how much of a difficult time I had with the practice.  I did not belittle, I stated what the church teaches. She is the one who was patronizing and accused me of judging...all I did was state the church teaching, and defend myself against the patronizing post, sans emotion.
Posted by agapecarrie[/QUOTE]

Have you considered a hobby other than the knot?  Just an idea.

You DO preach and judge on here pretty often and there have been several ladies who don't come to this board now because of this.

If you doubt this at all, check the FFF post on Etiquette board from Friday.  It's on the second page now but it could bring some insight to how you really come across here.

agapecarrie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:368ba73e-c8ec-4954-a550-f8e6200d7d16">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Lent : Have you considered a hobby other than the knot?  Just an idea. You DO preach and judge on here pretty often and there have been several ladies who don't come to this board now because of this. If you doubt this at all, check the FFF post on Etiquette board from Friday.  It's on the second page now but it could bring some insight to how you really come across here.
Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]

Apparently, again, you did not read my post. I never ever commented on what your practice should be. Telling people that I did is detraction and not the truth.

Do you know what the word judgement means? Do you know we are to judge actions? This is scripture. We are not to judge the state of souls. I have never ever judged anyone's soul.

Stating the church's teachings without emotion is not judgement. It is stating the truth.Telling someone who steals that stealing is wrong, is NOT judging them. Telling someone who kills that killing is wrong is not judging them.

Riss91

I have a couple thoughts here:

oot – you posted on the E board that agape said you HAD to fast regardless of your health situation. That is not true – she said in the post that clearly there were exceptions to the rule. Shame on you for lying in order to spread hatred to someone that shares your faith. And to slander her on another board is very middle-school. I’ve seen you turn what agape and calypso say around and slant it into something that they did not say nor imply, merely because you’ve disagreed with them in the past - that's unfair. Disagreeing is fine – I feel it’s helpful to all of us to hear others’ point of view. And everyone needs to be “called out” every now and then, but doing so in a non-constructive manner does nothing but progress the negativity. Also – as for telling agape to get a hobby – not for nothing, but you’re on here, too (so am I). So, don’t be slinging around insults that could be applied to yourself and many others.

Agape – You bring up this “non-emotional” method of responding many times when others have been put-off by your input (which keeps happening).  I think you may need to consider 1 Peter 3:15  -

“If anyone asks you to give an account of the hope you cherish, be ready at all times to answer for it, but courteously and with due reverence.”

I truly feel like your wealth of knowledge is wasted because of your tone. I do not see why you cannot speak with kindness and warmth while sharing information. A little humility and care for your fellow Cathlics/knotties goes a long way. Oot is right – you have turned people away because of your tone. Including myself. Doesn’t that bother you? Yes, people come here and they are gravely misinformed at times. It's upsetting to many of us that our faith can be grossly manipulated and misinterpreted. But, how on earth does it make any sense to belittle them, or make them feel inadequate? That is what your "non-emotional" tone does, whether you want to admit it or not.  Nothing good comes from it. Wouldn't you like for people to see you as someone they look to for advice, not only because of your knowledge, but because you have a kind heart? Honestly, it baffles me that someone so involved with the faith wouldn't see the need to be kind in their communications.

Calypso1977

well said, Riss.  id wondered where you'd gone off to.....

ootmother2

riss,

PM

bibliophile2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_lent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:ee2ceb31-04c3-4efd-9288-06f79debf83bPost:40bcab7c-e4c2-4d19-8e42-90bc8304b4f7">Re: Lent</a>:
[QUOTE]well said, Riss. 
Posted by Calypso1977[/QUOTE]

Ditto.