Ugh! I was in a Wedding Party thread on here and another bride posted that a groomsman bailed because he "has a problem with one of the guests" and was asking if she should still invite him. I said that I wouldn't, and not only would I not invite him, I would probably end the friendship.
Well, a couple of the other posters jumped on me and said I was uptight, etc. if I would end a friendship over "someone not attending a PARTY." I was appalled. I explained that as a Catholic, I believe that a wedding ceremony is much more serious than "just a party" and that backing out of the commitment to participate in the sacrament and stand with us in support of our relationship (especially for what the OP herself had described as a completely ridiculous reason) is a lot more offensive than simply not attending a random party.
These girls completely ridiculed me and accused me of being pompous and thinking I'm "more religious" than them. When I told them the reception is a party, but that the wedding is not, they reiterated that "actually, it IS." It made me so mad because I was just trying to explain that to Catholics and to many other religious brides, weddings are not "parties". I find it offensive to refer to a Nuptial Mass or a religious wedding ceremony as a "party" and I think the way that some brides criticize others for pointing out that, to them, it has a lot more significance than that is obnoxious. I just had to vent and hopefully some of my Catholic sisters will understand where I am coming from!! Maybe I am just extra touchy because today is my last day of work before the wedding, so I'm under extra stress, but it was very annoying!
I wanted to see if any other Catholic brides find it offensive when people refer to the wedding as a "party" and, as Catholics, if you do feel that being a member of the wedding party holds certain religious significance. It was always my understanding that if you are a bridesmaid or groomsman, you're not just getting extra recognition on the day of the wedding - you are standing up with the bride and groom as someone who supports their relationship and who they can count on throughout the marriage. That is what I was taught. To me, the notion of a WP member just deciding, "Oh, hey, I don't like this guest so I'm not going to come," is unacceptable.