Premarital Counseling

babybchbum

How many of you all are going through premarital counseling? Are you doing it yourself or seeing a mentor (ie pastor, counslor etc)?

FI and I went to our first session yesterday with a Pastor from our church. He was very laid back about everything which made me feel so much more comfortable about it. ( I didn't really know how FI would react because we are private people)We are going to have 6 lessons we cover and will probably meet with him 2 or 3 more times to cover all the lessons.

He Gave us the names of 2 books to read: 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman and His Needs Her Needs by Willard F. Harley, Jr.  (needless to say I came home and ordered them ASAP)

He also gave us 48 Questions to ask before Marriage that FI and I are to answer seperately and our Counsler will use to guide us through the lessons.

Is anyone else as excited about PMC as I am? Is there anything that came as a shock to you through PMC? Any good books that were recomended?

ufsweetiebear

We've had a wonderful time. It wasn't always easy but we've learned so much. Our Pastor isn't much older than us and has so many things in common with FI. His wife is a gem and I've connected with her as well. They regularly say that we remind them of themselves. We're using the "Preparing for Marriage" workbooks.

TTnoles

wow, that sounds awesome.  Since we are basically DW our pastor has been counseling us thorugh email. 

babybchbum, do you have th 48 questions doc electronically?  I would love to see it!

dogluver315

We are Catholic and our priest had a list of things we had to do.  Our meetings with him were phenomenal. We went through so many things.  We also had to attend an engagement encounter weekend that was by far, the best thing we've ever done.  I wish everyone could experience this.

The 5 Love Languages is a GREAT book and a very easy read.  My H and I love referring to our love language.  Now that we understand this, it really makes sense in our relationship and they way we interact with each other.

Have fun with your sessions.  The sessions are for you to learn as much about each other as you can and to really get a deeper connection with each other.

babybchbum

Tara, I don't have it electronically but will be more than happy to scan it or even type up the questions for you.

TimsGirl10

We will be meeting with our pastor for PM counseling starting in the fall.  I am nervous, but excited.

The 5 love languages is a FABULOUS read- and really can be applicable to all relationships you have, not just a marital relationship.

babybchbum

Here is a Link to the Document my pastor gave me:

http://www.mediafire.com/?ssu6whzmud72ciq

lisanunez73

We did a weekend seminar at the church where we will be getting married. I'm marrying a therapist so it is very important to him that we get counseling.  We will also have private sessions.

BriarRose84

My FI and I talked to our pastor today. He gave us a huge survey to complete separately and then we see how we match up over various issues. We have our first session at the end of the month and will have about 2 or 3 more before the wedding. He also recommended the 5 Love Languages which we are going to start reading together. I am very excited about it!

Kristin789

Here is a quick, free, don't-have-to-register website that has a mini quiz with the 5 Love Languages questions on it:
http://www.selectsmart.com/FREE/select.php?client=5lovelanguages

I am in no way connected to this website or the 5 Love Languages book or the author of 5 Love Languages.

We didn't go through the PMCounseling, because the church we wanted to be married in required a TWELVE MONTH program.  Yeah.  TWELVE MONTHS.  So we were married at the reception location instead...

Bre2Be

5 Languages of Love is excellent!  I read it on my own several years ago and highly recommend it.  We also did the "Preparing for Marriage" workbooks early in our engagement.  We also worked with our Pastor for about 8 weeks on various topics like finances, personalities, work life, family, etc.