New York

Wedding Website nightmare! (long one)

MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone!  Hope your holidays were all great!
So, my reason for posting...I started my wedding website and posted it up on my facebook, getting mostly great responses eg. love the pics, the propsal was great, etc.  Well, then I get an email saying 'oh guess what someone has rsvp'd to your wedding'.  ???  I haven't sent out invitations, the wedding isn't until June 9th???  So it turns out my FI's uncle took it upon himself to RSVP for himself and his date, some woman I don't even know.  I had intentions on addressing his invitation to him and his wife.  So I sent him a text something along the lines of 'you can't rsvp until you receive an invitation'.  How does he know I was even inviting him to bring a guest, you know?
Then I'm at my Grandmother's house for Christmas Eve and all the distant relatives are calling to say Merry Christmas.  A cousin who I've seen once in the past 10 years (for a funeral) says 'maybe my brother and I will grace you with our presence'.  Excuse me?  Yeah, you were no where near on the list and it won't bother me if she never speaks to me again b/c she doesn't get an invite but still...obviously posting on my facebook was a bad idea and I've since removed it, but can you believe the audacity of some ppl???

Re: Wedding Website nightmare! (long one)

  • My only suggestion would be to put a password on your website- ASAP.   When you do send out STDs or invites, you can include the link again with the password.  OR consider closing the website completely and open a new one.  Basically try to avoid uninvited guests from continuing to view the information and possibly spreading it to other unwanted guests.

    Obviously, you know that blasting it on FB was a really really terribly bad idea... but there's nothing you can do about it now... you jut have to deal with the aftermath.

    I would do your best to gracefully apologize for jumping the gun and putting the information out there.  Explain that you are trying to keep what's left of the planning under wraps and that formal invites will be sent in the mail.  You will, no doubt, have some pretty hurt people when they realize they didn't get an invite.  At that point, just politely explain that you had to keep the guest list small and apologize for any confusion.  It really is quite rude to advertise a party (wedding) on FB for all to see, then get upset when people who you didn't intend to invite want to celebrate with you.

    Good luck.
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  • I know, I know!  I was just so excited to share and there are plenty of people that are aware I'm getting married and don't expect an invite.  I didn't even realize I could password protect parts of the site...ugh.  I'm a tool.
    As far as the cousin is concerned, the more I think about it, the more I think she was just trying to be funny b/c she seriously NEVER travels to see the family.  Oh well, it is what it is.  Learn and move on, right?  Thanks for your input!
  • You can also hide the RSVP site (I'm assuming you're using the knot for your site).  And then show the RSVP page after you send out the invites.  That way no one else can RSVP until then.

    I agree with the PW protection.  I did it for some, but not all of the pages.

    And like Monica mentioned above, FB is not the best place to post that.  I emailed my bridal party/Mom to give them a "sneak peak," but that's the extent of it.  I guess for other people who might be reading this I would suggest an email blast to people you are definitely inviting rather than posting it on FB.
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  • I created a private FB group for just the bridal party. I used it to schedule the time for picking dresses and for showing them different ideas. I also put non-wedding related talk in there as well.
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