Ohio-Cincinnati

Most awkward RSVP. Ever.

A little background... My father married a woman who has 3 brothers.  I actively see 2 of these brothers, have relationships with their families, see them at holidays, yadda yadda yadda.  Love these guys better than my blood relatives :) The third brother lives somewhere in California, and is something of the family "black sheep." (He is a rocket scientist.  No. Seriously, he works for NASA.) But from what I've been told he's... odd.  But whatever. So StepMom asks that I send him an invitation, since all her other brothers are invited, that I include her Odd Brother.  "He won't come, but please send him one anyway."  I am somewhat opposed to doing this at all, but to make all my parents happy, I usually try to honor their wishes.  Even though I've never met the guy.  Even though he doesn't attend family functions, I sent him an invite. Today I get a sweet note in the mail from Odd Brother.  It says "Dear Jennifer, I hope my wife and I will be able to meet you and Matt someday. Sorry we can't make the wedding.  Our hopes and prayers be with you.   Love, (insert name)" So my immediate reaction was "Ah, that's so nice!"  Then I realize he sent us a check for $25.  I totally feel guilty for sending him an invite now!  He probably just thinks I sent an invite to get a gift/money, and that's SO NOT who I am!!  Tell me I'm overthinking this, please... b/c now I'm faced with the dilemna of cashing the check ASAP (so as to not keep his account in limbo for another month +) or does that look greedy and tacky?  Should I wait till after the wedding?  What would you do??? (wow, that was long.... ) :)

Re: Most awkward RSVP. Ever.

  • afloggieafloggie member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Hmm...I would not think too much of it. It was a nice gesture for him to send you a check. I would just go ahead and cash it and get a nice thank you card out to them ASAP.
  • dawnfraleydawnfraley member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Yeah I definitely wouldn't think too much in to that one! Of course I am a total over-analyzer too! LOL! I'm just now in the beginning stages of planning and forming our guest list and I am already noticing that I have those types of invites too! People I never see since they are out of town but they are part of the family.
  • mjc468mjc468 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    At least he recognized the big day and send you back the RSVP. I'd cash check and send back a thank you card ASAP. People appreciate a fast thank you card. I had mine down 2weeks after I got back from my HM and guests were really appreciative of it. I think it was an extremely nice gesture of him and he obviously cares about the wedding and you. Seems like a good guy :)
  • edited December 2011
    I wouldn't think too much about it, either.  They didn't have to send the check, so I think that they did it b/c they genuinely care about you and Matt.  I would just send a nice thank you card a.s.a.p. like pp said and then cash the check.  I'm an overanalyzer, too, but I wouldn't worry honestly.  :)
  • stosha1stosha1 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Jen. My love, cash the check and send a thank you. You are overthinking it!Now, if you sent the invite JUST because you wanted a check, that'd make you eeeeeebbbbbbbbiiiiiiillllllllll.hehehehe.Smile Chica!
  • HolliWouldHolliWould member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Absolutely concur. He sent a gracious note and a modest, but, probably sincere gift. It would insult him not to cash it. Cash it and send a gracious note back. He'll appreciate it. He probably thinks that you invited him to be polite, not to fish for checks- and he's right, of course.
  • tia0314tia0314 member
    Eighth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Oh Jen. I agree with pp's. I don't think sending an invite made him think you just wanted money. Cash the check and send him a thank you. Then, buy me a margarita. Just Kidding!
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  • edited December 2011
    I totally agree!  And not that I know his entire situation but I doubt that $25 was breaking the bank for a NASA rocket scientist!  I mean, it was nicredibly nice!  But you shouldn't feel guilty at all.
  • catbarnes09catbarnes09 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Agree with the others. Cash the check and send thank you. Nice story, actually. Sure beats the guests who decide to bring more people than were invited!
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