Advice from the May/June knotties

Happily9

I have noticed that a few girls on here will be getting married soon...so first of all-Congrats!  And secondly, do you guys have any good advice for those of us who are still a ways away?  Any hurdles you can help us avoid?  TIA!

kevinandmonica2011

1.  Elope... lol

2.  Enjoy being engaged.  This is something I wish I would have done more.  I was busy planning my wedding before I got engaged... and I kind of wish I would have taken a few months to just soak it all in before we set a date, picked out a venue and went full steam ahead in planning mode.

3.  I have said this before, but it bears repeating... no one will ever care as much about your wedding as you do... not your friends, coworkers, bridesmaids, fellow knotties, not even your mother or your fiance... NO ONE.  It is important to still be a good friend, fiancee, daughter, etc... not always the bride.  Make sure to still have date nights and girls nights and call your mom... without mentioning the wedding, because... when the day is all over... you will want to have friends and good relationships with people.

4.  Make sure that you and your Fi are one the same page with your guest list.  If you say "no kids" or "no plus ones"... issues will come up.  Trust me, they will... and it is important that you both are able to support each other and stick to your guns.  We have had the "no plus one" thing come back at us at least a dozen times... each person felt they were deserving of an exception, but Kevin and I both had to deal with pissed off people b/c we said no.  If he would have backed down, I would have a lot of really po'd people and vice versa.  It was important that we both held our ground.

5.  This is important especially when you get down to the last 2 months.... if it isn't going to stop you from saying "I do"... then it's not worth going crazy over.  The flowers aren't the exact shade of creamy off-white you imagined... no big deal... your great aunt is upset she didn't get seated at the parents table... oh well... the best man gets ttrainwrecked and gives a really awkward speech... it will be something to laugh about for years to come.

6.  Soak it all in... every once in a while put the planning book down, look at a picture of your future hubby or that gorgeous rock on your finger and just savor it for a moment.  The days fly by faster and faster and before you know it, everything you have been working your butt off to plan will be over in a flash.  Believe it or not, you are probably going to miss (at least a little) the DIYs and the planning and the anticipation. 

7.  Last but not least... and I haven't gotten to this point myself yet, but I have seen this advice repeated over and over from newly married girls... on the day of your wedding... make sure you pull your husband aside, somewhere quiet and away from your guests... and just enjoy a few minutes to yourselves.  The day goes by so fast.  I keep reminding myself of this and even told my MOH to remind me so I don't get so caught up in everything that I forget.

DondadaTimes2

Monica's advice is pretty dead on. And Ill probably repeat a lot of what she's saying. I had to stop reading so I could think on my own

1) I would agree with eloping, I'm pretty sure most brides who are planning or planned the wedding primarily on their own would agree, but I was so set on having this wonderful big wedding that I refused to listen, so I know all of you will too. With that being said, prepare to be stressed. Prepare to have things go wrong as the date comes closer. Save some time off for days you decide you just need a freakin day off!

2) Take your time on EVERYTHING! I jumped to pick my WP, venue, and DJ and am kicking myself hard for it all. Some people will tell you that you need to book fast before its taken! Bull (It might be different if you're planning it for a holiday). I ended up changing my venue and losing my deposit for previously mntioned reasons. Josh and I jumped to get the WP decided and then made some incredible friends that we wish were a part of it. I added 2 of his sisters then about 6 months ago got closer with the 3rd. It was just a mess. The dresses dont take long to come in, you really dont need to pick until 6 months out.

3) Dont stress the details. Nobody is going to notice that the DIY table #s are a little crooked, or the venue chairs are not in your color scheme, or your BMs didnt walk down the aisle at the exact time in the song that you wanted them to, or that your FMIL is dressed like a 20yo. Your guests will notice if youre unhappy/stressed, if the food is bad, or the music sucks. Focus on making sure your guests have a good time. When you start to stress, look back on weddings you went to. Do you remember the chairs, table #s, centerpieces?

4) Let people help you! I am huge on just doing everything myself so I know it goes my way. I finally broke Saturday and let me mom offer her advice on my DIY and let her help me put eveything together and it was such a huge help and unloaded so much stress.

5) Monica said to make sure you and FI are on the same page as far as "rules". 100% true. As soon as youre on a diff page things go wonky. However, as soon as one of your "rules" is being pushed so hard that its ruining relationships, let it go! My uncle pushed so hard to bring his 9yo son and I fought like hell against it to where I stopped talking to my mom. Its not worth it. Im letting him come and if anyone else complains that their kid couldnt come Ill let them know he wasnt invited but came anyways. Then let it be. Its simply not worth the fight after a certain point.

Im sure Ill come back with more later, but Im blanking

crystaldes1029

The girls said it! Mine was now almost 7 months ago and A. Yes just elope weddings are so 5 years ago! Most importantly don't go crazy over little details... no one notices and/or cares. I didn't do 80% of what you see on the knot for details, traditions, certain dances or what not and everyone came, drank, ate, danced and had a ton of fun because it was so relaxed.

Drink a lot of booze and just have fun! Its just a party.