How to cutdown your list of guests??

Lucydvs

I originally planned on having 125 guests and now it's gotten to nearly 180!!
I MUST cut it down to 150, but how do I tell my mom that her friends/co-workers aren't coming?? Did I mention she's paying for majority of my wedding??
What to do? Any suggestions?

sunshine_day_dreams

I agree with LTB.  If your mom is paying, you can't really tell her to cut people.  Unless the venue won't hold them all.

Have you had a direct talk with your mom and let her know why you're not comfortable having all these people and asking her to cut down by "x" number of people for you?  Maybe you could compromise and say, "I'll cut back by "x" number if people if you'll cut back by this many."  I'm sure she's just excited and wants to share with everyone, and maybe she doesn't know that it's not what you want...?

Your other option would be to graciously decline your mom's offer to pay and you and FI pay for everything yourselves.

When H and I first got engaged, we sat down and made a list of rules for who we would invite.  ie:  No one further out than aunts/uncles and first cousins in the family, no friends that either he or I hadn't met (since we'd been dating for nearly 4 years at this point), etc.  This worked for us b/c we paid for everything ourselves and could let our parents know it wasn't in our budget to invite them all.

WeMakeMemories

I have to disagree with the other posters. I handle all of the wedding sales for The Elkridge Furnace Inn and I work with a lot of Brides and with that comes working with a lot of parents as well.

I always require that the Bride herself signs the Contracts for one main reason - when the Bride signs the Contracts, I am legally contractually obligated to the Bride as my actual client and the Bride alone, meaning she gets to make all the final decisions and I must listen to her and nobody else.

I understand that your mom is paying for everything, but imho, what you want is all that matters. Although she might want everyone she knows to share in the joy of her daughter's wedding day, it's not her wedding, it's yours. At the end of the day YOU ultimately need to be happy with everything because it's your wedding, not mom's. Just because she's paying for the function shouldn't mean she gets to make the decisions.

Good luck with everything.

Cheers!

CollegeSweethearts

^^^I agree although she is paying, it is your wedding day...she had her turn.  I hate how everyone assumes you must follow everything your mother said because she wants to redo the wedding she had 20,30,40+ years ago.  Everyone should have a good enough relationship with their parents that they will bend for what you and future H want for your day after all it is your wedding day.