Minnesota

Cash bar offensive?

As we move along in planning, the costs are adding up. We are serving a dinner at the reception. We have not had any excessive things such as favors and we are making our save the dates/thank yous/ and invites, not having a videographer and having a photographer where we print our own prints trying to cut costs. We are both in college and paying for part of the wedding ourselves. We are going to have a keg and 10-15 bottles of wine at our reception for our guests to drink, then have a cash bar due to budget. I feel bad that we can't provide an open bar all night, but we are trying to accomodate as much as possible. I have heard from a few people, including my reception vendor, that it's not standard to have an open bar anymore. Opinions? I posted on the reception ideas site, but I was wondering what you have seen in weddings around here and what Minnesota brides are thinking..:)

Re: Cash bar offensive?

  • kschuekschue member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Sounds normal to me. I wouldn't be offended at all. Your guests will be fed and be with the new married couple, don't feel bad about not providing an open bar!
  • genevieve27genevieve27 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Not at all. We are doing unlimited wine(my future hubby is a wine importer) and unlimited beer. Cash bar for liquor. Our wedding coordinator told us we could easily rack up a 10k bill if we added in liquor! Sorry, but I'm already paying that for food! If they really don't want to pay for it then I'm sure they'll sneak it in:)
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  • edited December 2011
    I heard you should have 1 keg for every 125-150 people. After that is gone people can pay for their own. I don't think it is offensive at all.
  • edited December 2011
    I don't think cash bar is offensive at all.  We're planning to have 1 hour open bar at the beginning of the reception and then open beer and wine the rest of the night.  Guests can pay for liquor if they want.

    I've been to quite a few weddings that have open beer and wine and I think it's totally normal!

    Good luck!
  • EmilyW416EmilyW416 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't think its offensive at all. Most weddings Ive gone to has been a cash bar :)
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  • edited December 2011
    I've never been to a wedding with an open bar all night! bottles of wine available all night sure, but thats it. We havent got to that point in the planning yet, but im sure we'll go the same route!
  • edited December 2011
    This makes me happy to hear...I got 102 responses on the board post and many of them were negative. I am so glad to hear from some positive feedback from some people in the midwest! Minnesota nice isn't dead. :)
  • edited December 2011
    Its a regional thing and totally acceptable in MN.
  • edited December 2011
    I don't think it is at all! I plan on having a cash bar just because there will be some guests who I know will have a little too much fun with an open bar. So the fiance and decided that we would do a free keg or two all night, but any hard liquor has to be purchased be guests. I have been to weddings like that before so I'm hoping no one will be offended.
  • edited December 2011
    It is not offensive to me... and seems acceptable in MN
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  • tpender13tpender13 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It is a regional thing. Generally, anything that your guests have to pay for is considered bad ettiquette. But I have never been to a wedding w/an open bar all night. I'd try to host whatever you can to last all night, but hosting beer/wine and cash for everything else is usually okay around here.

    FTR, I'd much rather have a cash bar than a dry wedding.
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  • colstj1colstj1 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It is definitely ok in MN.  We are having wine and champagne and then a cash bar from there :)
  • luckybreezeluckybreeze member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I don't think it is offensive either. Actually not only is it financially smart, but hopefully it also will cut back on the chances your guests might over indulge and possibly drive. I am not a drinker, so we had decided on doing an open soda station, and possibly might buy a keg (we have a very small guest list), any hard alcohol would have to be bought by our guests... as for the post about wanting guests to pay vs. a dry wedding.... I agree 100%! My cousin made the mistake of having a dry reception, in a hotel attached to a bar.... Most of the guests left for the bar right after dinner Frown...
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  • racergurl822racergurl822 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    we are doing the same thing. we are having open bar for an hour and then beer all night available until its gone. I think it is normal now days because expenses add up. :)
  • edited December 2011
    I don't think it is rude at all, we haven't gotten to that point in the planning yet but I think we may go the same route.  I haven't been to a wedding where they have a open bar all night, most people just expect that they will need to pay for their own drinks.
  • edited December 2011

    I don't think it's offensive either, we are doing a cash bar, with no happy hour because my fiance's mom isn't a fan of alcohol and my family is.   I do know what you mean some of the other boards people are ettiquite natzi's and forget that ettiquite can be different in different places.   I think in Minnesota it's a very common thing to have a cash bar. 

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  • edited December 2011
    Not at all offensive. Offensive would be anyone coming to the wedding just to drink instead of coming to celebrate your special day with you.

    Is an open bar nice? Well of course it is, but no one should expect it. Besides, the weddings I have been to with unlimited amounts of alcohol have had some not so pleasant occurances.

    We will have 1 maybe 2 kegs. Then a few cases of wine and champagne for toasting. Once it is gone, it is gone. They will then have a cash bar option.
  • kelliem522kelliem522 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I agree with everyone that this is quite normal. We will be having multiple kegs, many bottles of wine, a champagne toast, and unlimited pop covered by us. This way, there will be something for everyone to drink that they don't need to pay for. Other than that, we will be having a cash bar the entire time that people can choose to purchase different drinks.

    I have had friends who had open bar until a certain dollar amount is reached. I believe that they had around $1500 limit and it was gone within a half hour of people arriving at the venue. Open bars are very expensive and end up costing almost as much as the food if open all night.

    Go with your original plan! :) Not offensive, especially if you already have other beverage options available for people to drink at no cost to them.

    Best wishes!

  • logana1logana1 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am doing a bottle of red and white wine at the tabels, a champagne toast, and then one keg, the rest is cash bar.  You're fine!
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  • edited December 2011
    I think a cash bar is perfectly fine, in the past year I went to four weddings and they were all cash bars with the exception of keg and wine. For our reception we are having a couple of kegs and free pop. We don't really have wine lovers so I don't think we will be having any of that. Who knows things may change we are still over a year out.

    Do what you think is best. Brides from other parts of the country don't know how we do it in MN.
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  • Slider_852000Slider_852000 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I am for sure having a cash bar we may do drink tickets for the wedding party and wine and beer for the first hour but we cant afford to for the whole night.
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