Honeymoon Discussions

Honeymoon Registry

What's your take on this? Anybody had any experience using a honeymoon registry instead of traditional gift registry? Why has The Knot not discussed this?

Re: Honeymoon Registry

  • I think they're tacky. I say pay for your own sexfest. It's discussed on the boards pretty frequently. Everyone seems to have a different opinion.
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  • Here's a post about them from yesterday on P&E [url]http://talk.theknot.com/boards/ShowPost.aspxPostID=62523569[/url]
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  • I was thinking about doing a registry for our honey moon and a gift registry so our friends and family can choose which one they would like to give us. My Fiance and I have lived together for 4 years so we have most of the stuff that people ask for when they're getting married. I know some people think it's tacky, but I think it's a great idea, but I also don't think you should have it be your only registry. I think older generations like grandparents and such would rather purchase from a gift registry.
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  • I'm not down with HM registries either, but a lot of people do them and say their guests give them good feedback. Whether their guests are being honest or not is another story.Having said that, a lot of our guests for our DW wedding gave us activity gifts - jetskiing lessons, restaurant vouchers, etc. I found it exhausting, frankly.
  • This has actually been discussed quite extensively on the knot boards. I think they're tacky, not because it's paying for a "sexfest" but because honeymoon registries are dishonest to your guests about the gifts they're purchasing for you. I would have no problem buying a friend and her new hubby dinner on a beach or a fun snorkeling adventure... but most honeymoon registries don't let me do that. If I purchase these "gifts" the couple registered for online, the couple just ends up getting a lump sum of cash instead. So there would be absolutely no point to me sitting in front of my computer pondering whether my friends would appreciate a tour of the Mayan ruins over a sunset cruise - because no matter what gift I choose, they're just going to get a check in the mail. The fact that honeymoon registries make it look as if you're actually gifting couples with these experiences just leaves a really bad taste in my mouth. If you want money, just tell me you want money. Don't be lame and disguise it as a "honeymoon registry."
  • I am in the beginning stages os setting up my honeymoon registry. I have known people who have done them and I have enjoyed buying gifts for them on it. We had a pretty big engagement party where we got most of the stuff off our macys registry. At this point, I would much rather receive HM registry stuff. I have researched a few different HM registries, and decided on using Traveler's Joy
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  • I find them tacky, for the reasons MMM posted. They are really just a registry for cash. I also find the % thing bizarre. I've never met a couple that didn't want cash; your guests know this. If you want $$ for the HM, just spread the word that you are saving for your HM. People will write you a check and you don't have to give 5% to anyone. If you do go this route, conventional wisdom is that you should only register for the extras, and you should do it along with a traditional registry.
  • They are discussed ad nauseam, if you scroll back a page or two you'll find posts. For many reasons, including many of the reasons already posted, I find them very tacky. If you honestly don't need anything then you don't need any registry. Just because you're getting married doesn't mean you have a right to get tons of gifts. The point of showers and registries were/are to help the couple set up their new home. If you're all set then you skip the shower and let your guests know that you really are all set and would just prefer to celebrate with them at the wedding. Asking people to pay for your vacation is just ridiculous. I also agree with the PP who said that guests may tell you to your face that it was a cool idea, but that doesn't mean they really thought that. DH's grandmother recently called me because she was invited to a wedding where the couple's only registry was a honeymoon registry. She was mortified that someone would ask for a vacation and didn't know how to handle the situation- but she would never ever tell the couple what she really thought of their registry.
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  • Although you are getting a lump sum (minus whatever percent the site charges) it all depends on how you use the site I think. If you have people give you money for an event you have posted, use it for that. My FI an I are going to take pictures of us doing the activities that people are "buying" us, and include them in their thank you card. That way they know we really did use the money for that and it doesn't seem like we are hounding people for cash (because we aren't). We don't really want just cash, we want a fun honeymoon... so I think it depends on how you look at it. We are also using Traveler's Joy because it is one of the only sites that doesn't charge the guest (although their is a % charge for the couple at the end... but the guest never knows). I think they are a really good idea, especially if you already have enough pots and pans and such... Good luck!
  • This is an interesting discussion. I don't think it would occur to most of the people I know to consider this tacky. I've thought often recently that there is definitely such a thing as taking etiquette way too far. I'm thankful that I have a family and friends who think that strict etiquette rules are overrated and even a little ridiculous. And I certainly don't consider my family a classless breed - we just like to do things the way we like them and will enjoy them the most, not as they're dictated. I would consider registering for a honeymoon. FI and I have lived together for over 6 years and we're all set in that department. I know that my family will buy gifts whether we register or not, so unless I want to wind up with a LOT of stuff I can't use or enjoy, I have three options which many would consider equally tacky. We can ask for cash. We can use a traditional registry to upgrade the house related things I already own. Or we can register for a honeymoon that we'll never forget. Personally, I'm leaning toward the honeymoon registry.
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  • I have three options which many would consider equally tacky. We can ask for cash. We can use a traditional registry to upgrade the house related things I already own. Or we can register for a honeymoon that we'll never forget. Personally, I'm leaning toward the honeymoon registry.Or you could skip the shower; most people bring cash to the wedding anyway.
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  • I think some people have a problem with the HM registry because Honeymoon= short term and Household goods=long term.  
  • I personally do not understand why so many people are upset by a honeymoon registry (I mean no disrespect). As a guest of a wedding don't you want your gift to make the couple happy? Why is buying a towel set or kitchen accessories more accepted than contributing to a honeymoon? Some may say 'pay for your own vacation' (can it also be said 'buy your own pots and pans?')- I cherish every memory of every vacation that my fiance and I have taken together; and I will have those memories for the rest of my life. Looking at our vacation photos always puts a big smile on my face. If loved ones of mine wanted to start their married life with an amazing honeymoon I would have no problem contributing to it as a gift. I just don't get why a gift for the home is supposed to be more meaningful. I would think that memories of your honeymoon would last a lot longer than most traditional wedding gifts. Some couples may be setting up a home together for the first time and need houseware; but on the other hand there are couples that have lived together for years and do not need anything for their home. I think some ettiquette is a little bit old fashioned in regards to weddings. What it comes down to is, as a guest of a wedding you are going to spend money on a wedding present- a $100 coffee maker will cost you the same amount as $100 towards a honeymoon. I want the money that I spend to go towards something the couple really wants (I don't care if it is for the home or for a honeymoon), and will enjoy. And no, my fiance and I do not have a honeymoon registry. We have not registered for anything yet.
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