Honeymoon Registry

reese511

lets all just agree to disagre & move on.  obviously no one is changing their opinion.

suzieharris

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_honeymoon-registry-21?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:11Discussion:1db3999b-4d79-421b-9ffa-7e399cf0df4fPost:4bc31054-8490-4cf9-853b-2de349682dfc">Re: Honeymoon Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Honeymoon Registry : Yep.  You're supposed to have a shower to be showered with gifts... not money.  This whole thing is a big bag of tacky.
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE]

 In my opinion a Shower is tacky!  You invite a couple to a wedding and they feel obligated to purchase a gift (or add to a honeymoon registry...which is a gift!)  Then you invite the wife to a shower where she is also feeling obligated to "shower you with a gift".  Have you not looked at this Nation lately.  Times are freakin tough.  People are losing jobs and not receiving social security not to mention paying out the ass for medical insurance.  If a bride and groom are giving a "suggestion" of a honeymoon registry to their guests then so be it.  The guests can choose to participate or bring a card with money included or not or a cheap ass picture frame from Marshal's.  Every bride has a choice.  She was asking for suggestions for websites to use not to ream her for her decision to use one!!!!!

AmoroAgain

Oh for crying out loud.  Honestly, a shower, just like a wedding, is an event that you do not have to attend.  If you choose to go, then that's whatever.  We had friend and family at our wedding who are going through tough times, and you know what?  We got a card from them and nothing else.  That's completely fine with us because we KNOW they couldn't do more.  Yea, and that includes my mom, sister and a couple of H's friends.  At my "shower" some of the people attended couldn't afford a gift either, but they wanted to spend time with me, and hey, I was cool with that because I'd rather see them, then make them feel bad for not giving me a gift.

ok..so having a registry w/ "stuff" and a HM registry = begging for money
but a card box at the wedding doesn't?

Um, no, it's a place to put cards.  Do cards have to have anything in them?  Cause they don't.  I don't have a problem with a "stuff" registry, as you so eloquently put it as it grows out of the traditions mentioned earlier.  HMregistry is for cash.  Cash only.  And it's a lie, because you aren't gifted with an actual bottle of champagne or a couples massage, you're just given cash. 

If that's what you want, that's completely fine.  Just don't register-- FOR ANYTHING.

suzieharris

As I said before...she was asking for suggestions for a honeymoon registry not asking for your opinion on having one.  Leave it alone.  And by the way, my principal at my school (aka boss) has paid for our parasailing adventure and she will be thanked to the end and back for that gift.  When I talked about the registry with friends I had one that said,"oh thank God...I was gonna get you a Target gift card and know you would spend it on toilet paper since you have 5 kids".  I am relieved to know that our guests are happy to provide something, if they wish, for something that is meaningful.

cassandra13187

Boo on the naysayers! Your wedding is about you. If you feel the people you invite would be comfortable with it, then you don't need approval from theknot forums! My Dad and Stepmom did a honeymoon registry because they both were older and had everything they needed. People loved the idea. When they saw pictures of the honeymoon they felt like they had contributed to a week in paradise for two people they loved. It sounds like people around you have been telling you they like the idea, so go for it! People may rip me to pieces for this, but my FI is a musician, and jokingly asked if he could register for some things he'd like to have from guitar center for his in-home recording studio. I said ABSOLUTELY YES! My reason: our wedding is about us, and celebrating who we are as a couple. Our friends and family, especially those being invited to the wedding, know us well enough that when they see that on our registry, they'll laugh and probably fight over who gets to give it to us. It's about you in the end, no one else. Good luck with everything and the honeymoon sounds amazing! 

Chasity08

The honeymoon registry I am using actually doesn't give me a check at all. The guests print off a voucher type thing and then can give me a check or cash with it to donate towards what they chose (what they printed the voucher off for). The honeymoon registry site does not handle the money at all. So everyone keeps saying "make a small registry, people will get the hint and just give you cash" Well they can still do that, but now they have something to put in the card with it if they choose to go that route. I personally HATE just sticking money in a card and giving it to someone, I feel like it makes it seem as though I put absolutely no thought process in to what I wanted to give them. Doing this allows them to stick something else in the card showing "I think you would really love to do this on your honeymoon." Or even if they didn't print off a voucher or anything, it'll show them what we would LIKE to do on our honeymoon, and they can base it off of that to make a nice little note in the card like "Take this and treat yourself to a nice dinner in Paris" or something of the sort.

And in regards to saying it's "tacky" and saying the guests may think so, who knows your own guests better then you? How could someone possibly tell me "well it's tacky and your guests probably will think so too"? I know my guests better then anyone, and I know they wont think it's "tacky." and honestly, I think it's kind of rude to use wording like that when it comes to anything regarding a girls wedding? Girls have been planning their weddings for their whole lives (in their heads anyways, haha) and the last thing they want is some other girl saying "well you made this choice and it's tacky" I'm sure all of the girls going around making these rude, oppinionated comments would be so offended if someone walked up and said "Wow, the centerpieces you used are so tacky. I hope you didn't put much time in to them" It's just rude. I don't understand it. If you don't like the idea of a honeymoon registry then don't use one, but really, who needs all the negativity. Noone. I understand if someone asks for your opinion saying "I would never use one because my guests would find it inappropriate" or "I would never use one because it's just not my thing/style" But going around purposefully trying to make people feel bad about the fact that they even ASKED about it? What are we in Junior High again? Come on ladies. We're all adults here, and noone needs to go around being mean to one another to make yourselves feel better or whatever reasoning you may have to do it. It's unneeded, and frankly, a bit immature.

And Amoro I don't believe it says you'll have a heart attack because you don't like HM registries, it says you'll have one because of your negativity in general. And it was a figure of speech. Just thought I'd clear that up. =]

Goldlie11

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_honeymoon_honeymoon-registry-21?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:11Discussion:1db3999b-4d79-421b-9ffa-7e399cf0df4fPost:5e50d987-23e1-4af3-9173-828709cf355b">Re: Honeymoon Registry</a>:
[QUOTE]The honeymoon registry I am using actually doesn't give me a check at all. The guests print off a voucher type thing and then can give me a check or cash with it to donate towards what they chose (what they printed the voucher off for). The honeymoon registry site does not handle the money at all. So everyone keeps saying "make a small registry, people will get the hint and just give you cash" Well they can still do that, but now they have something to put in the card with it if they choose to go that route. I personally HATE just sticking money in a card and giving it to someone, I feel like it makes it seem as though I put absolutely no thought process in to what I wanted to give them. Doing this allows them to stick something else in the card showing "I think you would really love to do this on your honeymoon." Or even if they didn't print off a voucher or anything, it'll show them what we would LIKE to do on our honeymoon, and they can base it off of that to make a nice little note in the card like "Take this and treat yourself to a nice dinner in Paris" or something of the sort. And in regards to saying it's "tacky" and saying the guests may think so, who knows your own guests better then you? How could someone possibly tell me "well it's tacky and your guests probably will think so too"? I know my guests better then anyone, and I know they wont think it's "tacky." and honestly, I think it's kind of rude to use wording like that when it comes to anything regarding a girls wedding? Girls have been planning their weddings for their whole lives (in their heads anyways, haha) and the last thing they want is some other girl saying "well you made this choice and it's tacky" I'm sure all of the girls going around making these rude, oppinionated comments would be so offended if someone walked up and said "Wow, the centerpieces you used are so tacky. I hope you didn't put much time in to them" It's just rude. I don't understand it. If you don't like the idea of a honeymoon registry then don't use one, but really, who needs all the negativity. Noone. I understand if someone asks for your opinion saying "I would never use one because my guests would find it inappropriate" or "I would never use one because it's just not my thing/style" But going around purposefully trying to make people feel bad about the fact that they even ASKED about it? What are we in Junior High again? Come on ladies. We're all adults here, and noone needs to go around being mean to one another to make yourselves feel better or whatever reasoning you may have to do it. It's unneeded, and frankly, a bit immature. And Amoro I don't believe it says you'll have a heart attack because you don't like HM registries, it says you'll have one because of your negativity in general. And it was a figure of speech. Just thought I'd clear that up. =]
Posted by Chasity08[/QUOTE]
Why do you have a registry already when you're not getting married for almost 2 years?

AmoroAgain

You are so right Chastity!  How could I understand the innerworkings of anyone's guest list with over 100 people on it?  Very true.  VERY TRUE.  Except that in my experience, most B&G's don't know the intimate inner workings of every single one of their guests minds, soooo yeah.  Argument invalid. 

mmskaric

I'm in the pro-honeymoon registry and will probably do one (thanks for the honeyfund rec!)

I think if you already have your basics set, its fun to register for extras like kitchen gadgets and 1,000 threadcount sheets. But thirty years from now, which is going to hold a more special memory - the quesidilla maker you used once or the memory of the sunset from your honeymoon hotel balcony with a glass of wine in your hand and your new husband by your side? Duh.

Another reason I'm doing this IS for a shower. I'm in WI and I'll probably have a shower in TX. Instead of having to haul breakables across the country, I could get gift certificate-type gifts that are more easy to pack AND will mean much more later on. 

Blip-don't let the haters get you. You'll be fine. Sounds like your gets are kosher with the idea...that's all that matters.

HKD817

I have mixed feelings about this. Only because my FI and I just received an invitation to a wedding. Let me first say the invitation wasn't an invitation. It was a western union telegram. I guess they were going for something different and creative. The telegram listed info about the wedding and then had a section with hotel info...then it said Registry: don't have one. But you can contribute to our honeymoon if you like.

No Joke, this is exactly how they put it. I felt like it wasn't appropriate. So be careful about the wording. This doesn't mean I am totally against it, because if you and your FI pretty much have everything you would need for your home then what else is there.