Parents at Wedding Night Hotel?

Winnie McGovens

Would just like some insight if my fiance and I are making a big deal about nothing. We're getting married in Maine, where my fiance's grandparents have a house on the water, and my parents and my fiance and I live in Maryland. It's going to be a super small ceremony at his grandparents' cabin, and we're leaving the next day for the airport.

My parents are going to stay at a hotel while we're there and want to get my fiance and I a hotel room for the wedding night and then drive us to the airport the next day on their way back to MD. My fiance is really weirded out by the fact they'll be staying in the same hotel and driving us to the airport the next day, I'm a little uncomfortable with it but not to the extent he is. I am also not very close to my parents, and my fiance really doesn't click with them.

Are we being immature about this or is it legitmate to not want my parents around for the very early parts of our honeymoon?

CCBelle

If it was a small B&B, I may feel a bit uncomfortable.  But if it's a big hotel and really the only place to stay, then I understand.  And for goodness sake, you're all adults.  Hopefully there willl be no awkward "So how was your night?" questions during your ride to the airport.

lyndausvi

I think you are making more of this than necessary.  Most couples I know stay in the same hotel as OOT guests.  If the parents happen to be OOT, then it just happens, it's not a big deal IMO.

Then again, our wedding night hotel reservations got screwed up and the front office agent was an a-hole.  We ended up back the beach rental my parents got.  We spent our wedding night in a house with 16 other people (it was a huge house and we had our own room and bathroom, so it was not a big deal)

lizstill13

Just make sure you're rooms are right next to each other and you'll be fine.

SuMmErKuTiE

We'll be spending our wedding night at our venue since it's also a resort and it's complimentary for the bride and groom. A lot of our guests including our parents will also be spending the night. Definitely not weird.. they won't be in our room or even know where ours is.

Be thankful that they're not only taking care of your room for the night but are also driving you to the airport the next day!

jinxed8605

Our wedding night, we'll be in the same hotel as our parents and all of our OOT guests.

LaFemmeRousse

It's really not a big deal.  If you're that freaked out by it, just make sure the hotel puts you and your new DH in a separate area of the hotel from your parents.  What exactly are you two worried about?  That people will try to be funny and bother you in the middle of the night?  That your parents will make weird comments the next morning?

We will be staying at the same hotel as my parents and all our other OOT guests too.

Terry&Patrick

Bottom line: No one is going to bother you on your wedding night. Unless they are completely insane.

pandasquishy

Our reception was at a hotel where we stayed as well as OOT guests and both sets of parents.  It was not weird at all.  The hotel gave us rooms on different floors on their own.  Honestly, they know who you are and who your parents are and they're not going to just give you adjoining rooms or anything.  Your FI is over reacting!

It worked out really well for us actually, we all met for brunch the next day, they helped us load up the cars with gifts, reception decorations, and helped us all get home.  It was great.

kaesha

Seriously not a big deal.

dalm0m

You are making waaaaayyyy too much out of this. 

Everybody stayed at the same hotel after our wedding. 

We actually had a bridal suite & hosted the "after party" in our room.  After about an hour which was the 1st time I went into the main bathroom in the suite & realized there was a hot tub in there I kicked everybody out by literally saying

"Wow!  I just found out there's a jacuzzi tub in there . . .so why are all of you still here?"  Everybody laughed & moved the party elsewhere.  [you have to know my personality to realize as awful as that sounded it wasn't snarky at the time]

plessjm

I am sure like PP your parents will be just as akward feeling and wont be asking you any embarrassing questions and if they do roll with it and ask how their noght was. Your attitude towards the whole will more than likely determine yours if you are tense they will feel that and pick up on it. More than likely the talk in the car will be mostly do you have this or that ...aren't you excited...write us a postcard

AmandaMarie711

We stayed in the same hotel with all of my family and most of our OOT guests. It was pretty much known that our wedding night would be our first time and I was worried that it might be kindof awkward the next morning seeing everyone, but it actually wasn't. My brother and cousin drove us to the airport the next morning, and it was actually kindof nice getting to say goodbye to people in the morning when things were melloed out instead of at the after party. That said, I don't know your relationship with your parents, and I think ultimately it's what you guys both feel comfortable with. If you're able to be comfortable enough with it and not stress about it too much I think it could be a fun little awkward bonding story/experience to giggle at and share. But if it's something that's going to be too uncomfortable you could always try to explain to your parents that you guys are so grateful for their offer but you had a little different plan in mind.

akg0053

Nope, I think it's fine to stay in the same hotel as your oot guests, including your parents. 

But then, I don't ever think of stuff like this as being a big deal. Since FI and I aren't doing a rehearsal dinner, we are actually doing a brunch the next morning with all of our friends and family. To me, a ride to the airport isn't a big deal at all.

LoveBugBaby

NOT a big deal at all. We're getting married at a Hilton Hotel and not only will my parents be staying there that night, but so will a lot of our other family and friends!  It doesn't bother us one bit! We're staying in our own suite, alone, so I don't see why it would bother us?

jessNlane52804

I understand! FI and I will not be staying at the same hotel as our guests because it is a smaller hotel and our crowd would definitely find it hilarious to call or knock on our door after we've gone to the room for the night. We also don't want to face the family the morning after the wedding because there would be several people asking us for specifics. Since they've already been talking about those sorts of things for months and the wedding isn't until late sumer, FI and I don't want to take chances by staying at the hotel with the guests. We're actually starting the mini-moon on the wedding night and going to a B&B. Call me extreme, but I know my family and their lack of privacy and discretion.

mouse10031978

well, not to freak you out, but this was one of my biggest regrets of my wedding.  My parents stayed at the same hotel.  The manager at the fornt desk regrettably gave them a key to our room.  Earlier that day all the girls got ready in the honeymoon suite so it was a little messy, but not too bad, as most the girls took their stuff with them anyway.  And we didn't care how messy it was anyway- seriously like we were going to notice???! My mother thought she was doing a  good deed by cleaning everything out of the room for us and having housekeeping come in and clean up before the wedding night.  BIG mistake.  It was 3 in the morning by the time we started you know what and we  were all undressed, etc. and went to go for some of our personal items in my bag that I puposely left in the room for that night.  Gone.  Also, no changes of clothes- NOTHING. No shoes, No toothbrushes.  No birth control.  In anger, I rang my parents room in the middle of the night to discover that it was sitting in their room and they were sound asleep.  Apparantly she did not know they were my bags....  Needless to say the mood fizzled quite a bit and my fiance was waayyy  wierded out that my parents looked through our bags and saw all of our naughty belongings (which I don't think they did). She still does not see that what she did was utterly annoying....  However, I am still seething 4 months later about the incident. 

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

Our families and OOT guests are staying at the same hotel we are staying at on our wedding night. I don't think it is odd. It is a big hotel. I've stayed at the same hotel as my parents before. We'll probably have brunch at the hotel the next morning, too.

beloved555

I may be the only one but I think it is a little weird.  Not really staying in the same hotel but more the drive to the airport the next morning. Regardless of how i feel, what is important is how you and your fiance feel. If you two feel weird about it take a cab or ask someone else to take you to the airport. Your parents should understand regardless of how silly they may or may not think it is. You want to insure your night is the best!

veebroth

I see where you are coming from. My FI and I aren't too close with our parents either and would probably feel a little weird driving with them the next morning. I personally wouldn't want that weighing on me on the wedding night, but it truly is what is going to make you and your fiance feel best. If you feel awkward about it make separate arangements for sure.

masqueradebride

I personally can understand not wanting to stay at the same hotel. My stepfather cracks a lot of jokes and I am used to it now, but I feel best being at a B&B and not the same hotel. If your parents insist on paying for this specific hotel then it might best to just stick with that hotel and make sure that the FD people put you far away from them.

I would not feel awkward about the ride to the airport. You will be married. They know very well what married people do and there is nothing to feel awkward about. My fiance and I are going to my parent's house to open presents the day after.