Connecticut

Venue/Family Dilemma......

Long story short, my Fiance and I have been engaged for about 5 months now and during that time i have been looking for the perfect venue, but also we both got new jobs, moved into a new place, started our lives basically, so the wedding planning was scarce because of everything else going on. FInally within the past month or so, I have been really narrowing down the search and found a venue i am head over heels in love with. My whole family is basically from CT -- Waterbury areas. My Fiance's family is in MA - Lowell areas. We do have some family flying from out of state.

My dilemma is, is that this venue is in Kingston, MA which is about an hour from my Fiance's family, but about 3 from mine. When I brought up this topic last night at dinner, mainly bc i was so pumped I found the place i LOVE, i felt like i was being attacked by my mom, sister and dad. They shot down everything about the place, and part of me thinks it becuase it's not the type of wedding they want. I am traditional in some aspects, but not all. My Fiance and I dont care WHERE we get married, just as long as we say I DO. To some people, getting married in a church is very important, while to others it may not be. The other thing was open bar. I dont feel comfortable spending 5k for open bar just for standard brands, if we are paying for everything else. Its a sticky situation.

My ideas for waht type of wedding we wanted changed from old/rustic, to vintage, to now modern ballroom type. The venue i love it Indian Pond Country Club - it legit has everything I could want there -- perfect layout, colors, atmosphere, etc.

I was told, just to satisphy my family, to look more and see what else there is. Problem with that- i've already looked as far as I know at every angle.

My ideal wedding is simple but elegant --- Less is More. I'm looking for a place that is equivilant to the IPCC's style and decor and price, if not cheaper. If anyone knows of a place in CT -- I'd prefer it near Hartford because of the highway and travel accomodations. If anyone knows of a place in MA - Springfield/Holyoke area...that'd be great too.

My Fiance and I feel like we are at our ends with talking finances, so I think we might just end up paying for it all ourselves, but if anyone wants to help contribute, by all means.

Re: Venue/Family Dilemma......

  • edited December 2011
    I think if you love the site, you use it. It is your wedding.
    It gets sticky if they are paying for the wedding.
    Anniversary
  • edited December 2011
    With your two families so far apart, SOMEONE is going to have to drive a long distance. If you love the venue and it's near your fiance's family, then I say go for it. It may be tough to stand up to your parents, but there should be a way that you can sit down and talk with them and reach an agreement. 

    However, if you're worried about the cost of the venue you like, you might want to look into other places. 

    You might want to try weddingwire.com (clicky) to search for a venue, if you haven't already. Good luck!
  • rswan412rswan412 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I agree with PP- see if you can talk more with your family about it, and be prepared to foot the bill if they don't agree. If you tell them that you're having it there, and will be paying for it yourself, perhaps they'll realize that they don't have a choice and end up contributing.

    Your wedding, your day- your choices!
  • jacki8788jacki8788 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    agree with PP's--if you love it, and you're paying for it, Go for it! A few family members have made comments that our venue is far away, although it's only an hour away and it's a town where there's plenty to do if you stay over. Maybe find some things to to do in the area that your venue's in, and mention them to your family? If you're definitely going to have it at this venue, maybe they'll decide to make a weekend of it, and get excited for a mini-vacation :) Also, let them know about all the other venues you've looked into, and why they just can't compare to the country club you love. Eventually, they should come around. It's YOUR day!

    Good luck!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Melissa603Melissa603 member
    500 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    I'm sorry that your family is doing this to you. If you can't sell them on your venue, maybe try looking at the Aqua Turf (I'm a little biased becuase that is where we chose). There is a chapel on site where you can get married that is gorgeous, and you can bring in a JP. They have a few different rooms that you can pick from, there are two ballrooms which might not fit your style, but I think either the Glass or Wagon room might be more your fit and the coordinator Melissa has been fantastic.

    Please let us know how things go for you!!!
  • edited December 2011
    Good luck! :) You are in a little bit of a sticky situation!! If you do decide to look at other places, our reception is at the Springfield Marriott (they do ceremonies too) and I couldn't be more thrilled with it. We looked at so many and this was by far our favorite. If your interested in checking it out, call up there and ask for Rita. She's amazing!!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    I'd hate to admit it but we did decide to look elsewhere, to avoid any other situations, and i'm kinda happy we did bc we found The Riverview in Simsbury, CT and i fell immediately in love -- much more than IPCC. I talked it over with my FI and he loved it too-- prices are the same, but they give you ALOT more for your dollor at the Riverview.

    Hope all goes well from now on!! haha Thanks ladies!!!!!!!!!!!
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards