venting....is there a reason people ignore advice they ask for?

amyers321

I don't mean here on the board I mean in general.
I've had multiple friends ask me for advice about their weddings. I've given them numerous resources, numerous ideas, numerous links, numerous ...well just lots of stuff...and they've all done almost literally the exact opoosite of what I suggested.
I do not understand how someone says they are "on a tight budget" and I give them great vendor suggestions and other ideas on saving money and then they turn around and end up spending 3-4 times what they need to and get HALF what they coudl have!
I'm about over it at this point!!!
I'm sorry I had to vent.
Thanks.

Theresa626

Because they don't want to spend less.  They want to get what they want no matter what the price because they only have one wedding day.  They are only complaining about the budget to you because they are upset by their monetary constrains.  

amyers321

That doesnt' make sense though....they can get EXACTLY the same thing at a cheaper price! It's stupid!

Pretty Parula

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_florida-central-florida_ventingis-there-reason-people-ignore-advice-ask?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:66Discussion:b0406b10-999d-49b3-847d-ea3a90b35fc1Post:6a4643b9-ef8a-4ca9-8620-e5f4a7f3826e">Re: venting....is there a reason people ignore advice they ask for?</a>:
[QUOTE]That doesnt' make sense though....they can get EXACTLY the same thing at a cheaper price! It's stupid!
Posted by amyers321[/QUOTE]

<div>Yep, it's stupid fo sho. But like I like to say, weddings make people irrational. </div>

mlharbis

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_florida-central-florida_ventingis-there-reason-people-ignore-advice-ask?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:66Discussion:b0406b10-999d-49b3-847d-ea3a90b35fc1Post:2d3fa8eb-5534-4276-b53f-76e47f5e2fc7">Re: venting....is there a reason people ignore advice they ask for?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: venting....is there a reason people ignore advice they ask for? : weddings make people irrational. 
Posted by Pretty Parula[/QUOTE]

OMG YES!!!!!!!! Weddings make people so crazy! So much of it you just want to be like stop acting like that and just be happy for the person!

amyers321

I suppose that's what it is. I'm learning to just sit back and let the other bridesmaid take over(since that's what she has done anyway and since my supposed "best friend" has asked her to do all of the planning stuff anyway) I'm beginning to regret the fact that I spent money on a DOC for this BFF. It's hard enough to be a bridesmaid...it's harder when the other bridesmaid makes your life miserable and isn't a very nice person to begin with(the nicest way I can put it). I'm learning to just not care anymore. I just wish the wedding was closer....It's going to be a long 10 months. I find it funny that this BFF just said to me how sorry she was for how much trouble she gave me and for how she felt I was being a pain when it was my wedding and that now she finally understands but yet she is pushing me further and further to the side. It sucks even more because the one person I could vent to about it...i can't because it's her. I'm boycotting anything wedding related for the next few weeks. I told the other bridesmaid to "do her thing" since that's what she was doing anyway and to jsut let me know what I need to do.
Maybe I'm just being a "bridesmaidzilla". I don't know I just needed to vent. I get the whole "it's my wedding and I can do whatever" and that's fine....but to sit and watch a friend make poor decisions that end up costing her more money and then watch her give big deal planning things to the other bridesmaid sucks. I guess I'm just being a baby.

irisheyezfsu

why is the bridesmaid making all the decisions and not the bride? also why did you pay for this "bff" DOC, that isn't your responsibility. The couple are the ones that should pay for the wedding or their family, not their friends. All that you should be really responsible for is giving this girl a nice shower or crazy bachelorette party, buy your dress and shoes that are required by the bride and that is it. If you are helping with vendors it should be as a supported friend that goes with the bride, but the bride and groom should be the ones making the decisions and fronting the money. 

I always think screaming into a pillow helps when people push me over the edge just a suggestion.  I am a bridesmaid in my bff wedding too, her sister was made maid of honor only because she is the sister. otherwise she is driving my bff and myself nuts. she wants nothing to do with the wedding really, she complains about her dress during fittings, even though her mom paid for it and we are 18 days out.  She also did not plan the bridal shower that was supposed to be given by her and that fell to her mom and the shower being given to my bff by her in-laws the sister doesn't even want to attend! Weddings are drama, and emotional.  It is amazing we survive them haha. 

amyers321

The DOC was a gift....it was 100% my choice because I found it such a huge help during our planning.

I am thinking screaming into a pillow and avoidng BM #2 will help LOL.
Sister is MOH but not involved...which is fine with me. It's just interesting...and a hell of a lot less fun than I thought it woudl be especially after having just planned my own wedding. It really makes me miss my planning...even with the craziness. I thought this would be easier and instead it's more stressful . sigh.
Thanks though.