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XP: Venue Issues..

Ok.. I need to know if I am being out of line, because I feel bad..

Ok, so my venue... ::sigh:: my venue.. when I originally booked my venue I was given a quote.  $11,000 for 150 guests.  I asked for a breakdown of my costs, she said I'd get it later.  I was disapointed but my coordinator at the time told me that this was reasonable and she trusted her to not "rip me off" as she put it.

She also told me that I could only go 15% my contracted total of 150 guests but if I in fact had less than that 15% below that I could use that to add items back in.  We specifically asked if we could use some of that money to add an hour to our receptionand she said yes.  She told us multiple times we could use it towards whatever we wanted and gave the examples of "linens" and a "chocolate fountain." 

Ok, so, some issues have arisen here and there and while I have been very frustrated with her at times, all in all she has ended up coming through for us. 

Ok, so the other day I asked her for a breakdown of my costs as I had multiple times before and she informed me I would not be getting one.  I am trying to keep this post to not be hugely long, so to make a long story short I am not giving all the details (it would take me FOREVER to type everything) but she had previously told me that we would be getting it after we submitted the 10 day count and now she is denying that she ever said that.  She also is now denying that she told us we could use the "under 15% money" towards anything other than food and beverage. 

I am feeling very frustrated at this point.  I emailed her today and very respectfully told her that I expect that I get a breakdown of my costs as anyone should that is buying something. I explained to her that my math is not matching hers and it seems that I am either being overcharged or I am missing something in my math.  I also told her that I have documented in my notes both that she would give us that breakdown after our final count was submitted and that we could use the money towards other things. 

She responded to me today and addressed my concerns by basically lying right to me and telling me that she never said those things and I would not be getting them.  She was very rude in her email and kept saying "since your fiance is in the wedding business he understands how these things work and why I can't give you the breakdown."  The thing is, no, he doesn't.  When a bride asks him for a breakdown of costs he is able to give that to them. 

So, tonight, I did something I never do.. and I feel bad.  I contacted her GM.  I told him everything that has been going on and that I am disappointed and I feel that I have been deceived and I so want to be able to say good things about my venue, but at this point I don't feel like I can.  I haven't heard back yet.

I feel bad, because I didn't want to get her in trouble (which I may not, maybe he will email me and tell me he doesn't care and that's the policy, who knows) but I DO feel like I am being completely ripped off.  As I pointed out to him in the email, I am spending over $10,000 on one day a their venue and I don't think its too much to ask to get a breakdown of my costs.  But, on the other hand, I feel bad.  I don't like when people tattle on me and I feel bad tattling on her.  The big issue here is, this is not a few dollars descrepancy we are talking about here.. this is approx $4500 that I can't figure out what it is being used for!! 

Anyway, I guess I am just coming here because I know girls on theknot are brutally honest and if anyone thinks I am being a bride-zilla they will tell me.  I guess I am hoping to get some validation here (knowing that I may not) because I'm feeling kinda crappy about my decision.. even though at the same time I feel like I had to do it. 

Thanks girls..

Re: XP: Venue Issues..

  • bridechanbridechan member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I think you made a great decision! I would do the same in your position.
    When you are making such a huge investment for such an important day it is imperative that you feel confident with the way your money is being spent and the details of the event. I would, without a doubt, question the company just like you are doing, if they are not in the business of making brides feel comfortable and confident with their plans and decisions. In my opinion, bottom line is: it is your money, it is your day, you deserve to enjoy the planning process, and you have a right to 'problem solve' situations that get in your way! Don't feel bad or regret, I don't think you are out of line in any way.
    I hope your situation gets better. Keep us posted. 
  • jmucheech21jmucheech21 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Thank you.. that makes me feel better.  =) 

    I am just kicking myself for not demanding things in writing in the beginning.  I am in general kind of a push over and I asked a couple times and she kept saying "oh, we can't do that until it hits accouting" and all that.. and I trusted my coordinator.. which was stupid.  =/  I AM a push over.. but I'm NOT unintelligent.. and I feel like I should have known better than to sign that contract.  ::sigh::
  • bridechanbridechan member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I always feel bad when I ask for stuff in writing. I feel like I'm saying "I don't trust you" to the vendor. SSSoooo... I always blame it on FI or my Mom LOL. I say something like "I'm so happy we could work all of this out. I hate to ask but my ___ freaks when I don't have these kinds of things in writing. Could you help me with that so my ____ will like you as much as I do?" They usually laugh but get the hint that I NEED it in writing. I hope that helps!
  • jmucheech21jmucheech21 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I heard back from the manager today and he said he will talk with their sales girl today.  He was very polite, but unfortunately he said that it sounds like everything Cassie is doing is policy and he will have to ask her if she said those things, because he's shocked that she would (which she has already denyed, so I guess that's that). 

    ::Sigh::  thanks for the support girls.  I can consider this a lesson learned I suppose.  I should never have signed that contract and I know that.  I just wish that people were more trustworthy.  Its sad.
  • Ollie08Ollie08 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Ugh, that's the ultimate suck. I'm sorry that the GM wasn't able to do anything for you. FWIW, I always call or send an e-mail or something to the GM if I've had particularly good or bad service. If a server is exceptional, I feel it's just as important to recognize that, so when I have really really crappy service like you've experienced I don't feel the guilt of calling a GM because I know that I'm pretty fair in my judgement.

    It totally sucks what you're going through, but don't beat yourself up over it. Hindsight is always 20/20 and despite the fact that we know we should be getting things in writing, we don't always do that. :-/ I hope things get better for you. You're getting so close!

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  • jmucheech21jmucheech21 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Update:  I no longer feel bad!  Haha, the GM sided with her and said they NEVER give out breakdown of costs information and that is just the way it is.  He said "they are not publix, they sell packages, not items." 

    So, battle lost, I suppose.  Very disappointing.  Makes me sad that people are so not trustworthy, but oh well, lesson learned on my end!!

    Actually, bumblebe, not a hotel.  I'll give all the information after the wedding so that other brides can avoid the same mistake of going there.
  • edited December 2011
    WOW! I would be so pissed. Especially after talking to the GM. If they seriously can't give you a breakdown of what you're paying for - something is WRONG. It sounds like they just charge arbitrary amounts to their brides. I would continue to be a squeaky wheel and express dissapointment over the fact that the woman said one thing - and later completely denied it. Maybe wait until after the wedding since they are clearly unprofessional so who knows what the woman would do. UGH. So sorry! Just suck it up for now I guess & enjoy your day regardless. Then stick it to them after by reporting them to every website possible - possibly even the BBB. 
  • Mrs.B6302007Mrs.B6302007 member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    That really sucks - sorry that you were given misinformation from her.  I hope that your wedding day goes well despite all of this!

    Side note:  you look SO familiar!  I promise I'm not being all stalky but are you a teacher perhaps?  ETA: either that or I recognize you from the national boards?
    The Bee Hive Est. June 30, 2007
    "So I sing a song of love, Julia"
    06.10.10

    BFAR:We Defined Our Own Success!
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  • jmucheech21jmucheech21 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Mrs. B, I'll PM you.. =)
  • jmucheech21jmucheech21 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Actually, it won't let me PM you.. but, yes, I am.  =) 
  • edited December 2011
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