This is a long post, and totally un-vintage related, but this is the only board I'm active on and I couldn't hold it in any longer.
I think my bridal party is cursed. Seriously.
First I had my two best friends in the bridal party, one that I've known since high school and we kept in touch while I lived 2,000 miles away and then when she went to London for a year. She's my bestie for realz and maid of honor.
The second one was my best friend from college, attached at the hip all through college. When I decided to move back home after graduation, she took it really hard. That, coupled with some other things, led to us not speaking for over a year. She was supposed to be in the bridal party, but only just over the last few weeks have we been talking a little via text message again. So I was down a bridesmaid.
Then, when we did move home I reconnected with an old friend of mine from high school and his girlfriend. We hit it off like crazy. We became great friends over the last year or so, I was maid of honor at her wedding in June and I busted my hump to make sure everything went smoothly for her, and I asked her to be a bridesmaid at my wedding.
I helped her get the tattoo she wanted before the wedding even though we didn't have a lot of money either. I made table numbers and placecards the night before. I got her a partial refund from her officiant after the officiant effectively ruined their ceremony. I helped her find another inexpensive dress when she didn't fit into her dress two weeks before the wedding that she liked better than the original.
Fast forward to the end of July.
We had this big party for everyone who's collective birthday was in July, including myself and FI's best friend, as well as this girl's husband. We had it at their house. I started to feel sick (because someone handed me a drink with energy drink in it and my body can't handle caffeine. Oops.) So FI took me home and then went back to the party so he could get his best friend home later (who can't drive, he's epileptic).
While at the party, she starts making all these comments about how she doesn't get why we're together and stuff, and so FI asks her straight up if she doesn't think we should be getting married. She says Hell no we shouldn't be getting married. If we do we'll be getting divorced in a year.
He tells me this the next morning and I thought when I texted her about it she would chalk it up to being drunk and apologize. Nope. Stands by it. 200%. Thus begins both her and her husband's judgmental diatribe about how we're incompatible and they know my relationship better than me. I was shellshocked.
I haven't spoken to either of them since and don't intend to. Ever again.
I couldn't believe how presumptuous and judgmental they were being. I'm still pretty hurt about it. Not that they think that we shouldn't get married, cuz I don't give a sh*t what they think about my marriage. It's none of their business. But for someone who I considered a true friend to say something to me like "You're obviously so desperate to get married, you'll marry anyone." or "I'm glad I won't have to be a part of that painful and uncomfortable event." (meaning my wedding).
Nice. Real nice.
Oh and her husband? One of my best friends in high school? Agrees. Is less venomous but just as hurtful in his way. And did I mention he was supposed to do our ceremony?
Needless to say, we got a new officiant.
The hurt part of me can't understand why she would do and say those things. Or why anyone would.
And the angry part of me thinks "You're 21 years old and married to the guy you've been with since you were 15, you've been married for a month and a half and now you think you know everything there is to know about marriage and MY relationship?" and wonders if she was using me all along and now she doesn't need me anymore.
On the bright side, it has brought FI and I closer, because not only has it reminded us of all the reasons we're together, but I don't have her toxic attitude infecting me. (Did I mention all she does is complain, 24/7 about her husband and what an idiot and a jerk he is?)
But I'm not asking ANYONE ELSE to be a bridesmaid. The next one may die or something.
I've been holding this in for almost a month and just couldn't anymore.
Thanks for reading, if you made it through this novel...I just needed to get it out.
141 Invited so far!
112 Are ready to party!
29 Will be missing out!
0 Are MIA!