Florida-South Florida

RANT!!!!! (long)

OMG so our wedding is in Feb, we just finished sending the STDs. My FMIL lives in cali so i made the MISTAKE of sending her first 30 STDs and then 20 more when she ran out. I didnt want to seem pushy in asking her who she was inviting and getting all that info prior to sending them...i figured my FI would have checked it out with her.  Like no kids, no random ppl, no families of ex girlfriends, etc...
Soooo, she sends him an email of the list of 50 STDs she sent out...her list is over 140!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Like some included wife/husband/4kids, so n so & guest, etc.... i was in shock, we didnt want more than 200 at the wedding.
Shes assuming all these ppl wont come but shes invited ppl who got married and didnt even invite her or my FI, ppl my FI doesnt even like!!! Why would she send STDS to all these random ppl???
Im sooo upset, like how do i correct this situation now????? I was venting to my FI for like 30 min after, my throat was hurting haha.
I have no idea how to plan now, like if all these ppl actually show up then what do we do??? Do we tell vendors, well we only want 150 but there may be 300 ppl there?!?!?! 
Im def not giving any blank invites to her, i just dont know what to do now!!!!
can you believe it?/???

Re: RANT!!!!! (long)

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    edited December 2011
    OOOOOOOMMMMMMMGGGGGGGGG!!!! I don't even know what to say! I'm sorry you're going through this. That's INSANE!!!!! I hope it gets worked out.
    :: Lynette & PJ :: 1.22.11 :: For Sale ::
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    edited December 2011

    Wow!! Sorry, this seems like a mess! 

    I think your FI needs to talk to his mom and let her know that no kids are to be invited and the certain people he wants off that list need to come off it. He just needs to put his foot down. Unless she's willing to pay for all these extra people and all the extra expenses that goes along (extra flowers, chairs (if renting), etc.) then she can't just invite everyone at will.

    Where is the wedding going to be, in CA where she is? If in another state, then it is unlikely that these random people will travel for a wedding of someone they don't even know. It's still not right, though.

    It's hard, but it's got to get addressed.

    I wish you the best with this situation, I'm sure it won't be easy. Sorry!

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    MariMac84MariMac84 member
    Combo Breaker First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    OMG!!! I'm so sorry this is happening! I have no clue what I would do!
    I just asked FMIL to email me her guest list. Now i'm a little worried. haha

    Good luck to you sweetheart. I hope things work out for you <3
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    edited December 2011
    Okay.  I'm trying to think how I would correct this situation, but you and I may have very different personalities.  I, for one, would tell her (in a nicer way) that I don't give a rat's ass how many people she sent STD's to, all those people will simply not be invited to the wedding, and I'd state your reasons.  If I were you I'd pick and choose who I am going to invite from the list she sent you, and let her deal with the embarrassment of having a conversation with the rest of the people who aren't going to receive invites.  But like I said, you have to have a very strong I-don't-give-a-damn attitude and not really care too much about etiquette in order to be able to pull this off and not feel too badly about it.  (UNLESS she's paying for the wedding, in which case I'd tell you to suck it up and let her invite whom she wants).  

    I'm telling you girl, some people have no consideration!!!  Undecided
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    edited December 2011
    You know what they say about assuming...

    At this point, I think you might be kind of stuck. You have to invite the people that got the STDs. Maybe you can cut down on the rest of her list. Are FI's parents helping pay for anything? If so, then you might have to invite them all.
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    edited December 2011
    WOW - I'm so sorrry you are going through this ordeal.
    I think that this point, you will need to send invites to these people who have recieved the STD's and I hope that you will recieve some help to cover the cost of the additional guests.
    My advice to you is that you control the guest list moving forward so that there are no extras going out without your knowledge.
    I know you are in a sticky situation and I wish you the best of luck...JUST BREATHE!!!
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    edited December 2011
    Speachless :S Sorry I am not much help  O.o
    South Florida July Siggy Challenge-Bouquet image . image image ................. Invited:120image Attending:121 image Declined:001image Not Yet Replied:0image RSVP Date: July 25th Ready to Roll!!
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    nilofurjnilofurj member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011

    Thanks so much girls, really feels good to have some support.
    I do just have to deal with it at this point, i think ill put my foot down on the kids thing but i cant have her tell some ppl they are now uninvited.

    She is putting some money in so i dont have as much control as id like but she better cover her extra guests! haha, oh well i guess it could be much worse...like her not wanting to invite any friends/fam right? At least shes excited for the wedding.

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