What would you do?

waterroxy17

I just found out through another bridesmaid that one of my bridemaids is pregnant. Being that shes 4 weeks pregnant and my wedding is in 9 months... should i still have her as a bridesmaid? I don't want to obligate her to it and i dont want her to say she can be in it when knowling she may not be able to.

So... what would you do?

CandisH

I had this come up with FI's sister.  She got pregnant around Thanksgiving.  Honestly, I'm happy for her.  She asked if she got too big or uncomfortable if we minded if she stepped down as a BM.  Honestly, I'm leaving the decision up to her.  As long as she's there for our big day we want her to feel comfortable. 

FI's sister will only be about 4-5 months along so it's a little different than 9-10 months.  I would give her the option.  You wouldn't want her to feel "punished" for being pregnant, but also don't want to make her feel like she's obligated.

SailSteph

Agree with pp. It's hard to predict how she will feel in 9 months- I agree with giving her the option. 

Who knows she could have already had the baby!!!

twinkle82576

I agree with Candis. Maybe asking her, how do you think you will feel in nine months? Do you think you want want the added pressure of being a BM? Just make sure she knows you're not trying to push her out or anything, you just want it to be comfortable for everyone involved.

bridetobe417

I was in the same situation, and she really wants to be in the wedding. She thought that I wouldn't want her in the wedding anymore since she'd be pregnant and asked me if I'd be comfortable with a pregnant BM. The only issue we've run into so far is dresses. She's going to get a very similar style that comes in maternity. As long as it's the same color and someone similar look, I'm fine with it.

brooklyngurl81

I would leave it up to her, see how things go throughout these next months...

lgrn22

Oo I wrote a response but it didnt post!! ! I would wait until she tells you and then ask her what she thinks. As pp says she may already have the baby by the wedding, so she may be unable to attend the wedding. But if you give her the options she can still be a part of the events leading up to the wedding.

katje13

I agree with everyone.  I'd let her make the decision

waterroxy17

Thanks for your input!!

EvelynandManny

definitly wait till she tells you and leave it up to her... and make sure she knows ur happy for her no matter what she decides (you dont want her to feel like shes ganna be too fat for it lol)