Ethical Dilemna

SraChavezCervantes

The wedding is in 5 weeks and FI's abuelita (he's very close to her) is in horrible health (kidney suddenly took a turn for the worse).  Other boards say if their relative passes, go on with the wedding, culturally Latinos are very different with our extended families and especially our grandparents. I'm praying that the absolute best can come out of this situation, but when abuelita is up in age, you have to acknowledge that time is limited.  Culturally is it bad taste to have a wedding when a close relative passes?

JACKIE_RS88

I would say yes, if it were my family member I dont believe I would ask my mother to attend and be happy at my wedding when her mother just passed.  I'll check but I think its something covered under the wedding insurance.

MariodoMujer

I think people would understand if you went through with the wedding. Weddings are very different now a days. Thousands of dollars have been put into it, deposits have been paid, venues that book a year in advanced have been reserved. If you call off the wedding, you cant just say youll postpone it till three moths later. I agree with Jackie, excuse certain family members from attending, especially since they may be upset that youre still having it. And yes, check the insurance, to see if it will be covered so that you can weigh your options.
You can honor his abuelita at the wedding by having a moment of silence in her honor. A friend of mine honored her mother at the reception by placing a photograph of her on a short column with a candle lit next to it

Talk it over with your fiance. If something like this happens you both have to be strong and support each other because regardless of what you say or do, someone will be offended if you go through with the wedding. Youll have to be able to tactfully put your foot down. Personally, postponing the wedding is not something I would consider. It is very impractical. But Im wishing and hoping for the best in your situation. Hopefully grandma will be okay and be able to attend

Nati05

I agree with Mariodomujer. Talk it over with the family, see what will work best. I hope she gets better!!

SraChavezCervantes

Update: Abuelita is still in the hospital and the situation doesn't look AS bad.  We are going through with the wedding  without abuelita and we have decided to postpone a honeymoon in case we have to make a trip to Mexico with the family. There was a passing in the family yesterday...the transmission on my car.  Ay Dios Mio!  I so want these last few weeks to be quiet.

Nati05

Well I'm glad things with Abuelita are looking up a bit! She might just need some time. I think the HM plan is a good one. Keep hanging in there girl!

kris_tee

I think you made a great decision!

themrspena

I'm sorry to hear about your FI's Abuelita. My FI's best friend's stepdad passed away from cancer about 6 weeks before his wedding date. It was a hard time because he was practically raised by him. They went ahead with the wedding but lit a candle in his honor and played special songs he liked during dances and during the cake cutting. It was very sweet and no one was offended. I wish you the best on your day and hope Abuela gets better.

SraChavezCervantes

Abuelita pulled through and is insisting on traveling from Chicago to Omaha, Nebraska (8 hr drive). Pray for her so that she stays feeling strong!  Thanks for all of your kind thoughts/ words!