Is it necessary?

penguingal06

So FI and I are well under way when it comes to planning our wedding. We have just about everything taken care of that can/ought to be done by this point. However, I do not have an e-ring. I am perfectly ok with this particular quirk of our relationship but I worry that at my shower next month my family and friends will think it odd that I don't have one. Did any of you ever get engaged without a ring? If so, what kind of reactions did you face when people found out?

tracy_k

I have friends who didn't have engagement rings and so far as I know it wasn't a big deal. If anyone asks just smile and say you didn't want an engagement ring but you're looking forward to having a wedding band, or whatever.

musikbx

I am still in what you might call "an engagement gray area" (meaning, he hasn't asked me yet, haha) so I'm no authority, but If they think it's odd, then it's their problem... not yours :-)

kiddodarling2010

I didn't get my E-ring till 3 months after we got engaged. more people then i expected wondered where the ring was and a lot of people didn't realize we were engaged. so i got a lot of questions, but i didn't care! lol i wanted to get a ring i would wear forever not a cheap ring that would last like 5 years so thats why we waited

Becky&Chris

If you are comfortable with it, then I don't see any problem. I think you should probably be prepared to answer the "But where is your ring?!" question a lot because people are nosey and have preconceived ideas of how things "should" be. It may get annoying having to explain over and over again, so you might want to have an idea of what you might say if asked (even if the answer is simply "FI and I chose not to get a ring for personal reasons".) 

FI used to tell me he was concerned about being able to afford a ring, all the while saving up money (what a trickster), but I was always fine with it. Marrying the person you love = way better than any bling money can buy.  

nrwolf00

we are not officially engaged either, i have a promise ring he gave me a long time ago on my ring finger which i love, but he feels is necessary to get me a bigger one. we are still planning everything but he just wants to do things "right"

its really your preference, if your embarresed then you could always say its getting sized, or you could jsut say we havent found the right one yet.

your family should always understand and if u dont think its a big deal then neither should they, as for friends and people- you cant ever win them all over

luckyme502

I was ringless for 3 months.  On January 8th we booked the venue, that weekend I bought a dress.  I didn't get my ering until March 18th.  I picked it out.  We were waiting until we saved the money to pay for it cash, without dipping into any other savings.  I felt weird at first, like when I went dress shopping, but it was worth the wait. 

Jeff and Deepthi

I with everyone else. We have started planning booked the hotel and everything, but he's not planning to offically propose til the summer. I'm telling people and just saying it's more traditional basis (Indian) then anything else. They just look at me and smile. I personally don't care when I get the ring, but we have a formal engagement and I better get it before then..lol Some people think I shouldn't even plan, even people on here, until I have the ring and I believes that's ridiculous.

cellarius

i think it's okay it's their problem if they care but if it bothers you why don't you guys go pick out a temporary ring together? just so you have something to wear on your finger. i don't have my ring yet but we've known we were getting married for a long time so we've been planning for a few months already. we were just waiting to get our taxes back. which we finally have this week.. yay!! we have also waited to officially announce our engagement to everyone besides family and very close friends until i have the ring. [he wants to still surprise me and do it sometime when we go on vacation]

it would probably bug me as well to have a shower with no ring! esp if we were planning on getting one and just hadn't picked it up yet. i would wear a temp one and just tell them you haven't chosen one or are saving or whatever the case/reason is.

[i'm not at all saying you need the physical object of a ring to have a committed marriage if you don't want one.. if that's so then fine and i would just say that.. it's just most ppl do want one and it means something to them as a symbol]