Is this ok...???

jenniemay24

Ok so I just got engaged recently, Aug 23 to be exact! I have not started major wedding planning because our wedding is going to be in July 2011. We are going to finalizing the ceremony this coming weekend. I know it is kinda early, but the place we want books up really quickly!So here's my question! I have read a lot of these posts that say we should not ask our bridesmaids until closer to the wedding. My bridesmaids pretty much have an idea they are going to be asked. My maid of honor really wants to go ahead and jump into helping me plan as she owns her own bakery and has connections! I want to go ahead and ask them to be a part of my wedding as soon as we finalize the date. So why is it that you aren't supposed to ask your maids until closer? My maids have already expressed a desire to help as we are all very close!Let me know your thoughts! I am thinking about asking them as soon as I can spend some time individually with them

jenniemay24

oh yea and possibly 4 our of 6 of my maids are either my sister or cousins that I am very close to! Only 2 of my girls are close friends of mine!

sfh5011

I just got engaged a week ago and I already asked my bridesmaids! It's such an exciting time & I couldn't imagine celebrating it with anyone other than them, so why not ask early?

laurenclaire1386

There are lots of things that can happen between now and when you get married.  I know you're close to these people, but it's possible that your relationship with them could change.  And if it does, you're screwing yourself by asking them early because it's the worst etiquette possible to kick someone out of a wedding party unless they do something horrendous.  It sounds like you're going to ask soon one way or the other, though.  So if you're going to ask nearly two years out, be very very sure.

arixana

If you know in your heart that your wedding won't be the same without them as BM's, then ask them, and enjoy the moment. Congratulations!

noelle24

You never know what will happen in 19 months.  This wouldn't be the first time that friends drifted apart or got into a huge fight. If you truly know that you will have someone (like a sister) be a bridesmaid no matter what, then I'd go ahead and ask. Just keep in mind that once you ask someone, you CAN'T un-ask them.  You'll be stuck. There's really no reason to ask them so soon.  If they are really your friends and really want to help you, then they will offer help regardless of whether they are a BM or not.  Being a bridesmaid is not a contractual agreement where work is exchanged for the "honor" of being in your wedding. Trust me, if they really want to help, they will. 

swim1011

It may be impossible to imagine, but there's a more than likely possibility that you won't be as close to the same girls by the time your wedding rolls around.  Relationships and people change.  I know it's hard, but wait.  Truthfully (I didn't want to hear this, either- I will have had a 2 year engagement by the time we get married next June), you  don't really start planning much of anything until you're about a year out.  Except maybe for a reception hall and ceremony place.  Sit back and enjoy your engagement for now!

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

Bridesmaids aren't required to help you plan the wedding or do anything for you, quite honestly. Anyone can help you plan. Even if you weren't having a wedding party, your friend would probably want to help you plan because she's your friend. So if she offers to do something I fail to see how that hinges on her being MOH or not.

JLYTAC

I know how you feel. I just got engaged on October 2nd and are planning for June 2011. I have already reserved the church. I am still working on getting the reception site.My best friend was there when we got engaged and she got asked to me MOH before the night was through. Last week, I asked my sister-in-law to be a bridesmaid. She is especially helpful because she just got married last year. They are both already helpful so I believe it's great to have them already. They have both relieved some of my concerns and provided thoughtful suggestions.I would recommend asking already but don't plan too much until a little closer to the wedding (except for reserving venues).

lilcassers

You may have had amazing friends all of your life lol.. but here's why. Girls are a bunch of catty you-know-whats. If something happens (a fight) and you loose a friend or don't want them in your wedding, it makes it akward to disinvite them or ask them to not be in the wedding. My friend who got married asked all her BM a year before, and she ended up realizing that one girl wasnt a true friend, and there was a whole bunch of drama, and she told the girl she couldn't be in her wedding 5 months before.. it was horrible. So, thats why