Our E-Party

[Deleted User]

So FI's mom has told me already that she wants to throw us an engagement party. Great! My mom wasn't going to, and I wasn't upset about it, so I was flattered that FI's mom wanted to.

Weeelllll FMIL wants me to be in the planning of the EP. I don't mind I guess but I don't like the idea of planning my own.... Awkward. She's a little sensitive so I don't want to hurt her feelings, but I need a response to her. Should I decline? How? I've never been asked to throw my own birthday party...so I sure don't feel right throwing my own EP.

Erg.

redheadfsu

1. Just tell her you don't feel comfortable planning a party in your honor. Explain that you are flattered that she wants to try a party for you but it isn't necessary. 

or

2. Give her a list of people that you want invited (& that you are 100% sure will be  invited to the wedding). Explain that it doesn't have to be fancy or anything. That you are very flattered that she wants to host it for you and leave it at that. (throw the ball back in her court)

sprtychick10

I agree that you shouldn't be responsible for plannig your own E-party. Maybe you could give her some tips on what you like as well as the invite list.

[Deleted User]

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_e-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:21fe5fbf-13e3-494b-a367-559feede86edPost:8fc258bf-96ae-42d1-9efa-a130258a3099">Re: Our E-Party</a>:
[QUOTE]2. Give her a list of people that you want invited (& that you are 100% sure will be  invited to the wedding). Explain that it doesn't have to be fancy or anything. That you are very flattered that she wants to host it for you and leave it at that. (throw the ball back in her court)
Posted by redheadfsu[/QUOTE]

I'll try this one first. Hopefully she gets the picture. Thanks ladies. <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />

[Deleted User]

Ditto the other ladies. You definitely shouldn't plan your own e-party. But giving her a list of people and offering her suggestions or answers to her questions about this or that is ok. That is what I did with my bridal shower.

NIKIKRUISE

Well i know its not "proper" for you to plan your own engagement party, maybe she just wants it to be perfect and would like your input? Could she need your help on guest lists, what kind of party you would like etc. You don't have to be very actively involved, but maybe she sees this as a bonding experience and not as a way to push the work off onto you...just a thought


GL!

KellyGo0525

My fiance and I just had our E party last weekend.  My mom and aunt threw the party for us, but I was involved in some of the planning.  Mainly i made up the guest list and gave my input on some of the decorating (i.e. colors and other decorations for the room since i dodn't want anything to look tacky).  While you may feel funny about planning your own party, remember that it is a party for YOU so if there is anything specific that you wantdon't feel bad about having input towards the party.

Rippellie419

oh, i can see where this is gonna go. My FMIL and her sisters threw our EP. I was the one cooking for it, planning who to invite, buying and printing out the invitations, buying teh balloons at the last minute, etc.

Then she kept calling us every time someone called her to respond. When i asked her how many responded, she didnt know because she wasnt taking a tally. I wound up cooking way too much food!

I couldn't even enjoy my E-party because i was hopped up on xanax from all the stress of planning it!

I hope yours goes better than mine