Anxiety!

vantica

We were engaged 3 weeks ago on our 2nd anniversary and decided on September of this year to get married!  I've always wanted to elope or have a destination wedding, but so many of my close friends and family are married with kids now, that up and going to some nice place isn't going to happen for most of them.  I realize that I really want a lot of those people there!  So, more traditional wedding it is.

However, as the costs add up, I'm super anxious about it all.  It's so tempting to spend all that money on an awesome honeymoon instead.  I feel like I should be excited about it all but I keep having to hold off the panic.  Lol.  Is this normal???

calliopeia2013

It's certainly okay and normal to be anxious about a wedding, both because they can be very expensive and because some people are very uncomfortable being the center of attention.  That said, if you feel like your anxiety is reaching a level where it's interfering with your ability to go about your life normally, or to enjoy your life normally, it's time to talk to a doctor.

GoodLuckBear14

Is your FI helping out here?  Do you have the cash on hand to pay for what you are planning?

If your FI isn't helping out, he needs to step up to the plate.  Sometimes just talking about where your money is going makes it easier to spend it.

If you are planning things that you don't have cash for, then you need to replan.  Only pay for what you can afford and do not go into debt for your wedding.  A lot of people have thrown beautiful budget weddings by doing a  lot of DIY and the ladies on the DIY board can help you out there.

If none of this helps, then you need to make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible because this is not healthy or normal.

wineo929

Come join us on the September 2012 board!! It's an awesome group of super supportive brides.

vantica

He's not great with planning, but I tell hiim everything I want to do and he just agrees.   Haha.  This doesn't bother me too much since it gives me a little freedom in planning, although we did go to the venue together.  Everything is already super budgetted, as best we can anyway with 120 people. (Is it bad I'm hoping not everyone will make it?? Haha.)  Planning on making my cupcake cake and favors and centrepieces.  My bridesmaids will help with most of that.  I think I just see my spreadsheet with costs and just freak out a little as it still adds up so fast anyway.....to spend that much money on one day seems so much.  I think that's the part that I'm having trouble dealing with.  Is it something that people just get over?  Or never had issues with to begin with?

vantica

Well, everything is pretty typical.  We're having the ceremony and reception in the same hall with a marriage commisioner.  The caterer I hope to have is rather inexpensive compared to a lot of others around here, but has a lot of good reviews at the same time. Buffet dinner reception with a dance to follow.  I know it would cut costs if we had less people, but these really are our closest friends and family.  There's so many because of anticipated dates, and lots of these people have kids now.  I'm kind of hoping lots of people leave their kids home with sitters.  Lol.  Also, another big cost is I really want an open bar as you really don't see too many of them these days.  My dad said he'd help out financially though I don't know how much.  Hopefully enough to cover the bar.  I'm also planning on a "midnight lunch" by providing my own trays from somewhere like costco.  So yeah, pretty typical.  The important things to us are having these guests there, and hoping they enjoy themselves.  And having everything pretty.  Ok, the last thing is me.  Lol.  I guess it's because we're doing so much ourselves and cutting so many corners, and don't even have to worry about the cost of a DJ or photographer, and it STILL adds up so much (so much in my mind, low compared to other's I'm sure) is what is frustrating me.