Just Engaged and Proposals

Too short of an engagement?

I just got engaged (yay!) after a long 7 years dating my now fiance.  Until about a year ago, I hadn't really been thinking about getting engaged, but within the last year it's all I can think about.  I would prefer to have a spring/summer wedding when the weather is nice and sunny, but obviously that would mean we'd have to wait about a year, which I really don't want to do.  Since it's been so long in coming, I really would like to do it this year.  My fiance and I have been talking about November over Veteran's Day weekend (since we'll have a lot of out of towners), but I have 2 concerns:

1: What if the weather in November is awful, we're looking at Northern California

2: The initial reaction from people when we've been telling them we're thinking November is, "OH!!! THIS YEAR???????"

Like I said, I am so ready to get married sooner rather than later and I feel like 8 months is a good amount of time to plan everything out without waiting forever to have the ceremony.  Do you guys think I'm crazy and should just put it off until 2013?  Any opinions are greatly appreciated, thanks!
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Re: Too short of an engagement?

  • My wedding is April 20th, and we didn't even have a venue until early February. You can absolutely pull off a wedding in a short time frame. I wouldn't let the party line of a year to plan and such deter you.
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  • redheadfsuredheadfsu member
    2500 Comments
    edited March 2012
    You can pull it off, but it might be more rushed than the average bride. If you have the budget, general concept, general idea of guest list, etc already ready to go, then you can do it.

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  • You can do it! I think it is plenty of time to put a wedding together. You may not get what you want for everything because things do get booked up early so go into it with an open mind.

    Congrats!!
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  • Eight months is definitely doable.  We planned our whole wedding in 4 months to the day of being engaged.  As long as you can get your venues.  I had to get my second choice for cake and venue for the reception, but it was fine.
  • Our engagement will end up being about 8 months long when we get married next month. It's plenty of time.  We felt the same way, we haven't been together quite as long as you guys (we're getting married 2 months shy of 5 years together), but when we did get engaged, we didn't want to have a super long engagement either.

    You can do it!  And congrats :)

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  • We decided to get married in January... planning on a November wedding. I feel it's plenty of time: knew people who put together a wedding in 3 months. 8 months is plenty of time... just have a clear vision of what you want a set budget. Congrats.
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  • Coming from someone who lives in Nor. Cal, I think a November wedding would be lovely (I've always wanted an October wedding, myself). You WILL have to deal with the possibility of rain, though, so have a back-up plan incase the weather conspires against you.
    But hey - maybe you'll be fortunate and the weather will be *perfect* with all those beautiful fall colors!
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  • We are having about an 8 month engagement as well and it has been totallly do-able.  Decide on a budget and get your big vendors booked quickly though, because they will be booking fast!  I say go for it!
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  • First- CONGRATULATIONS on your engagement!!!!!!!!!! :)

    I got engaged in October, our wedding is in August!  I have felt very good with our timeline, and we have been able to get all our vendors (we are getting married in a small town in Minnesota though).  I'd say if you are detail oriented and have good planning skills go for it!! 

    When you set your date, find your month on the month boards and the ladies on your board should be able to help you with any questions you have!!  The August 2012 ladies have been wonderful!! :) 
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  • Congratulations! You can totally do it! We got engaged last May but didnt decide on a date or ANYTHING until January of this year. We're getting married in October. It was a long process trying to find vendors that were available but we did it. 
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  • I am in a very similar situation! Just got engaged last week and planning an early October 2012 wedding. We are receiving the same reations from people. After talking with some friends that have already had weddings, I have come to the realization that if you really want a wedding to work within a time frame (almost any time frame) you just need to be willing to put the energy in to make it happen and be willing to compromise!

    Congrats and good luck!


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  • You have plenty of time to plan your wedding, congrats!
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  • Definitely not too short!  My close friend did it in six months in Southern California and it was great!  As long as you have your budget together (you'll be paying deposits immediately, and you'll want to get your dress soon in case it has to be custom-made), you'll be fine!
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  • Congratulations! Yes 8 months is plenty of time. I will be married 6 months to the date of when I got engaged. As long as you have money available to start putting down and making payments you should be all set. Good luck!
  • You can definitely do it, you just have to be on the ball & not procrastinate. As PP mentioned, you need to have your money saved & your ideas ready to go. We have a 9 month engagement and at times I felt a bit rushed, but not that bad. I know someone who just got married with a 4 month engagement. It's possible, just don't be frustrated if some venues and vendors are aleady booked. There is always someone else.
  • I had almost the same situation as you: dating slightly under 7 years when we became engaged and married the same year. We technically did not get engaged until March but knew we were planning on getting married so starting booking things in January and were married in August, which is about 8 months. We ended up choosing a Friday wedding for cost reasons and had no problems at all booking everything we wanted. Some places even offer discounts for booking closer to the wedding - our DJ gave us several hundred off for booking "less than 6 months to the wedding." I say go for it!
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  • Congrats! You can do it in a short time frame.  We had a little over 6 months to plan our wedding and things are coming together nicely.  I agree with PP though. Make sure you have the budget to pay deposits right away.  The first two things I did were find a venue and get my dress.  
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  • I was in a similar situation - I got engaged in January and my fiance wanted to get married this October. We eventually decided on next March, but I was asking around about what to do.  One of my close friends planned her whole wedding in four months and it was beautiful.  She assured me I would have enough time and I know a few other people who did it in less than a year, so I would say you would be fine if you decided on November.  
    The only thing that held me back from doing in earlier was I get stressed easily and I just wanted a little more breathing room!  Now we still have a whole year and I feel that we can take a little more time to research and decide on vendors, etc. all while staying sane and enjoying the process! In conclusion I think you'll be fine either way.  Remember the most important thing is that you are marrying the love of your life!  No matter how it turns out I'm sure you will be very happy that day :-) Congrats and good luck!
  • 8months is absolutely doable. the only reason we had an almost full year engagement was because we were nervous about booking venues since our area fills up quickly. As long as you can get a venue, you're good to go! The next earliest thing you have to do in my opinion is getting your dress, which takes 6 or so months usually if you're ordering it new. There are always ways around that though (rush order, or find a sample dress you can walk out with, etc).

    I would do it in 8 months rather than waiting another year for sure!
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  • Mine was less than 4 months.  It's totally doable.  I would say get your dress and venue first, then everything else isn't hard.  Honestly, I would have gone crazy if it had been any longer - you just have to make decisions quickly.  You won't have time to second guess or change your mind, which is good!!
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  • j-harveyj-harvey member
    Fifth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited March 2012
    It's enough time to plan a wedding.  Just be organized and decisive.  You would have more dress options if you're sample size, open to buying a used dress, or if there are other off-the-rack options near you. 
    You and your FI are the only ones who know if it's enough time to plan a marriage (will living arrangements be hard to figure out?  have you had all the important discussions about kids, careers, finances, family, division of household tasks) and whether it will be less stressful to have some extra time to do both. 
    If you are one of many OOT weddings this year, people might not be able to come because their wedding budget will be committed.  However, I don't know if pushing it back 6 months would help; i.e., if I had to save 6 months to be able to go to a wedding, I would skip it. 
    Congrats, and don't stress out if you hear from some vendors, "Oh, I've been booked since 2010."  Assuming you're not somewhere totally isolated, there will be vendors with openings you like.
  • Unless you have your heart set on popular venues at a busy time of year, you can definitely do it. Our engagement will have been about 4 and a half months, and everything is going fine. You just have to start making decisions an be a little flexible about things. 

    We do get a lot of comments like that though. Or people thinking I am pregnant (which I'm not). Just try not to feel like you are doing something wrong you need to justify. We got engaged because we want to get married, so we are getting married as soon as possible. That's it.
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  • Personally, if you're willing to wait 8 months for a fall wedding, what would it hurt to give yourself an extra 4 to 5 months to have the spring wedding you actually WANT? Just my opinion...
  • I'm doing it in 7 months (got engaged right before New Years getting married in July) so I'd say it's definitely doable. You will just have to pick a date that is available not just "pick a date". And get on the dress! I almost had to pay for a rush and it's coming in only the month before.
  • Have the wedding YOU want. If it is in 8 months then so be it, if you want to wait until spring then so be it....Good Luck!!
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  • Absolutely doable!  We got engaged on February 13th and our wedding date is October 27th (Just over 8 months.)  I have all the big stuff done, except invitations.  I got it all done in about 2 weeks and didn't feel stressed out once.  I think as long as you have an off season wedding, and you're flexible about venue, time isn't an issue.  I know a lot of people pulling off 5-8 month engagements this year.  It's no big deal. 
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  • We got engaged this month and we're getting married in June. Our budget may be tight but we're getting it done and its going to be BEAUTIFUL!! Forget all the reactions and do what you want!!!
  • Not at all! I got engaged in August and I'm getting married in June, a little under 10 months and I had plenty of time to plan. I actually had many months of doing nothing just starring at my engagement ring and buying wedding magazines. You'll be totally fine. Smile Happy Planning!
  • When you have your ceremony really depends on your venue. My venue required a deposit a year or more out so I ahd no choice. But if you can find a venue that will reserve you only a few months out then pick any date you want!
  • Honestly that's plenty of time. I got engaged Feb 5, 2012 & wedding date is May 25, 2012. We are having a very intimate ceremony since we both have HUGE families and the list seemed it will never end. Good luck & congrats
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