Feeling lost already...IT HAS BEEN A WEEK!

Aslichter

It has only been alittle over a week since he "popped the question". I am so excited about it! Basically because I wasn't sure he was going to with in the next 5 years!

But anyway, we both want to get married as quickly as possible but are still looking at a date possibly in 2012...but I have no idea when. Spring? Fall? Summer? Winter? My ideal colors would be pinks/greens and either gray (like a darker gray) or brown.  My man and I are both so laid back when it comes to making decisions, which does not help the situation.  Is there a way to help me narrow down what season I would like?

Also any advice on getting him more involved? I am a true believer in it being OUR wedding and not MY wedding. 

Maybe I am just thinking to hard about this but any help would be great!!

AdeleDazeem

You can use any colors you want at any time of the year so don't worry about that.

As for when, I knew immediately I wanted a spring wedding (and my fiance was cool with whatever).  Some people always a winter/fall/summer wedding.  If you don't know, then let's move on to some other factors

What is a good time for you and your fiance?  Do you have jobs, major events, or other impending things that would take out some times of the year?  Perhaps if you are a teacher, then maybe a summer wedding would work best.

Now start to think about key family members that have to be there - what do their schedules look like?

Beyond that, you have to think about prices.  MAKE A BUDGET before you do anything else.  Check out venues and see what you can afford and what times of year you can afford them.  Summer is peak season, late winter is usually off season.  Friday weddings can be cheaper than Saturday weddings, but not always.

Think about yourselves, the involved people, and the money you can spend.  I bet that will narrow it down a lot.  MAKE A BUDGET before you do anything.  And just have fun with it.

forrma7

hey there! congratulations!!

as far as advice goes, i would definitely take a huge deep breath about everything.

since you're planning a wedding in 2012, you have a long time to think about everything so don't panic at all. i think it's good you're trying to nail down a date as that is the most important thing.

im having a summer wedding, and i'm really excited, but fall weddings are also extremely popular

if you're worried about budget or want to book a venue that is extremely popular, i would look to doing an off-season wedding like in the winter.

for him getting involved, i wouldn't push that too much. what i mean is, don't demand that he have an opinion about whether or not BMs should wear knee length or tea length dresses. he most likely won't care.

find out the things that he does care about, and make sure he is involved in that.

my FI loves food, and cares highly about out menu and cake choices.

definitely stay calm about everything, and remember that your tastes and styles most likely will change over the months. mine definitely did, and you just go with it!

good luck!

abgpal11

Agree with PPs.
I wanted to add that where you get married could determine the season.  For example, getting married in the winter would probably be more appealing if you were doing it in Florida as opposed to Maine. (I'm just pulling those areas out of my head). 

It is also important to consider the logistics concering your guests as well.  My family lives 3 hours away from FI's family, but since my family is a lot bigger and has a lot of older members, we're getting married where I grew up instead of where he did. 

As far as getting FI involved, I know how you feel about it not being just "your" wedding.  I told FI I didn't want him to show up at the church and think, "What the heck is going on here?" So here's my advice based on my own experience.

Try to feel him out about what he might have an opinion on and what he might not.  Or he might just have very vague opinions.  Or he may only be able to tell you what he doesn't like, even if he doesn't know what he does like.  For example, FI didn't care what colors I chose, but he did have an opinion on the shade of them.  He doesn't know what kind of invitations he does like, but he does know a lot about what he doesn't like.

I received a magazine in the mail (I don't know who it was from but it wasn't like a "bridal" magazine) and it had invitations and decorations and favors, and so on.  I sent it home with FI and he took a sharpie and crossed out things he didn't like and circled things he liked or wrote what parts of something he did or didn't like.  He actually had a lot of fun doing it and was very excited to show me his ideas! 

Even though he's not really made any specific decisions on his own, it is really helpful for me when I'm looking at things to at least know what options are out and which options to consider.  At least it steers me in the right direction.  So just see what sorts of things he has an opinion on and don't press it if he honestly doesn't care.  And it might be easier for him to tell you what he doesn't want than what he does. 

Congrats and good luck!

[Deleted User]

Congrats!

The other ladies pretty much summed up what I was going to say. Since your wedding isn't until 2012, you have plenty of time. Once you get your budget set, start looking at vendors and getting some general ideas down. After you book your venue, church, photographer, cake maker and florist, the rest will start coming together.

Don't forget to enjoy your engagement bc it is truly a special time. Good luck with the planning and remember we are here to help.

DeeMarie213

I'm glad you are feeling less stressed about the planning. One line in your OP made me smile. " I am a true believer in it being OUR wedding and not MY wedding." It seems that view is lost on so many brides anymore. I wish you stress-free planning and a beautiful wedding day!