Constructive Criticism/ Opinion

Hey there! I am new to the student board, but I need some an opinion on a few things. Any advice or ideas are welcome, I just ask that you approach it nicely.. some of these posts get vicious ! :)  A little about myself..  My name is Jessica and I am pursuing a bachelor's degree in broadcast journalism.  I am a junior, and I have been with my fiance for almost 3 years.  We got engaged December 23, 2008, and we had originally planned to get married June 2010.  In order to save, we have decided to live in the "family housing" (once we are married) on campus and due to the long waiting list, we applied early.  Then I had a revelation.  I want a winter wedding complete with all the glitz and glamor!  The church and reception area are both available, and we have a spot for housing.  We are just concerned with the timing, and how everything will work out.Should we wait until June?Should we go with January anyway?Should we do a jp marriage, and have the wedding later?I'm just so confused and I think I need to maybe see this from a different perspective.. please help!! :) 

Re: Constructive Criticism/ Opinion

  • I'm a little confused - do you need to have the JOP wedding in order to live in student housing?If that is the case, and you will be saving a significant amount of money if you live in student housing and/or will lose your spot if you wait until June, then here is what I personally would probably do:Have a JOP wedding, move into student housing.  Explain to family.  Have a celebration/reception at a later date, when you've had time to plan (and save some money for it).I strongly advise against not telling your family if you have a JOP wedding.  I also don't like the 'have the wedding later' part you have written, because if you get married by a JOP, that is your wedding.  You can have a celebration, but it won't be a 'wedding'.  It's the choice you make by choosing to get married by a JOP.  But there's nothing wrong with throwing a party later so that everyone can celebrate with you, just be honest about it!
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  • I'm slightly confused too.  Does the family housing require a marriage certificate?If it does, then you really need to think about how important the "glitz & glamor" of a winter wedding is.  If you MUST have a winter wedding, then you need to be able to afford to NOT do family housing.What about the winter wedding appeals to you?  If you want a wedding with glitz & glamor, you can have that any time of year.  Perhaps a winter theme could translate into a wedding with silver and white with lights, etc, just minus actual winter motifs.  I think that if everything revolves around the family housing, then you will have to compromise somewhere.I'd avoid the JP marriage.  If you are wanting a glitz and glamor wedding, the JP will feel like a let-down, and you'll regret it I think.  Plus, some people will be annoyed that you did JP, then tried to have a "wedding" after wards.  I think choosing this route will end in more trouble than its worth.Good luck!
  • I'm assuming that with the family housing on campus you wouldn't be able to move in until the next school year anyway - at least that's how my school works.  If so, then you have a lot more options.  If you really wanted to change to January you could, and if you still wanted to go with June that would probably be fine too.However, if you can move in for the next semester, or if you need to proof of marriage sooner rather than later, you might want to opt for the January wedding or JOP.  It sounds like you wouldn't be as happy with the JOP though; maybe you could go ahead with an intimate church ceremony in January and have a larger reception in June with all of your family and friends.  That way the marriage will be official and you'll be able to still have the wedding it sounds like you are hoping for.
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  • Sorry for all of the confusion.. but believe me, I'm confused too! haha Thank you everyone for all the thoughts, they definitely pointed out some things I hadn't thought of!
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