Bridesmaids

SarahB0427

I have an issue with one of my BM already.  She seems to want to control things in my wedding.  Like she already told me she is not coming to my bachelorette party with an email back of "count me out" and told me she doesnt want to wear heels and that she doesnt want to walk down the aisle with this person or that person ETC.  I am so sick of hearing her complain about every little thing that I just want to scream at her.  The one problem is that she is my sister.  So, it makes me want to cry.  She thinks everyone should revolve everything around her and when I last checked this day was about me right?

jojochanti

I had this same problem, except that it was more than one of my BM's. The only hard part is that yours is your sister (one of mine was a cousin). There is a whole back story, but in hindsight, I really wish I could have been as big of a b!#@$ as they were and just drop them as BM's. We are not even in touch anymore (which is mostly because I was so hurt from their behavior).
Regardless of all of it, I always put on a happy face and ignored any attention seeking behavior and enjoyed my day and the process leading up to it. Since she is your sis, I would have a heart to heart with her and tell her that she is being difficult. If you HAVE to have her as  BM, then just ignore the behavior and remember it really is about you and your FI and don't let anyone spoil that. 

Through my wedding, I really learned who is there for me and who is just pretending to be.. and it really hurts to have to discover that during such a happy time in your life.

SarahB0427

I know...and it makes me so sad because if it was her wedding (or my other sister's wedding) I would be and there are plenty of other friends that I know would be honored to be in my wedding.  It really hurts...Thank you for letting me know I am not the only one that is going through this or went through this

breleficent

If I were you I would talk to her about it. Since she is your sister you can voice your feelings more than if it were just a friend. Keep in mind to approach it gently though. If you come at her with the whole, "you are doing this," "you are making me feel like that," "this is my day, not your's," you will only get a negative response.

SarahB0427

Thank you :-)

mrs.payne2010

i would just plan the wedding as you would without her opinion. if it means alot to her to be in the wedding then she will go with waht you want if not then you dont need her around bringing you down anyways.....like i said just doi what you want to do and if she has a problem with it she can back out. it may hurt you if you really want her in it but it may be for the better. i just think that this is the one day probably for the rest or your life that will be about you and no one should take that away. as for the bachlorette party, dont feel bad, its her loss and you guys are gonna have a blast with or without her.