2 Daughters 1 maid of honor?????

FRANCISDAWN2

I'd be interested in any comments on this topic. I have 2 daughters (both mid 20s) and would like to ask my younger one to be my maid of honor. We are much closer than I am with the older one, but certainly would hate any hurt feelings. Any suggestions? Can I have 2? Is having your daughter be maid of honor even appropriate? Maybe I should ask my sister, but she was my maid of honor in my first wedding. Again is that appropriate?
I love them all, but don't want anyone to feel bad.

ski2play

Agreed, with PP, have both be MOH's to avoid hurt feelings.  My daughter is my MOH in my wedding on July 4, 2012.  My son is my dude of honor, standing beside his sister after he walks me down the aisle.  They are 20 and 19.

cat772

I have 3 daughters and two sons, and FH has 2 daughters and one son.  What we have done is that my two oldest daughters, ages 18 and 19 are my "maids of honor".  My youngest daughter, age 9 will be our flower girl.  His two daughters age 23 and 19, will be the bridesmaids.  I didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings so each girl has had an opportunity to assist and give imput.  His son (16) is the best man and my sons 11 & 6 are the groomsmen.  
 As a mother, I understand how you feel, my 18 year old is pushing my buttons and driving me nuts right now while the 19 year old is being an angel, its easy to want to choose one over the other...   But I know that despite all the differences, my girls support my decision in marrying my FH and I want them to feel a special and important part of the wedding party.   Believe me there is no Brady bunch perfection here, I can guarantee someone will drive me nuts, but thats what kids do!  
Good luck in your decision and no matter what, do what you think is right, don't worry about proper ettiquete or anything else.  Keep yours and your families happi
ness first! 

Sue-n-Kevin

I only have one daughter, but have 3 now that I'm married (2 steps). I had my daughter, who is 17, as my MOH at my wedding in August. I didn't have to choose. She was honored to do it, and it made her feel a special part of the planning and the wedding day.

When it comes to having 2 daughters, my advice would be to have BOTH be MOH. Are they both single? If not, one can be a MOH and the other a "matron of honor", meant for the married person in the looooooong ago etiquette world.

Even if I felt closer to one of my daughters, never in a million years would I pick one over the other. They'd be "co-MOH".

It's jut an honorary name, but picking one over the other could definitely hurt feelings.

Magdala9

It is perfectly appropriate to have two MOH or have all 3 be bridesmaids.  I had 2 MOHs.

2dBride

We had two MOHs, and one of them was male. (They were my son and daughter.)  I'm a big believer in having the people you care about stand up with you, and making the titles fit the people instead of the other way around.

ski2play:  I am amused that yours is called the dude of honor (the same title ours had).  We started out asking my son to be best man.  He said that a best man is a groom's attendant, and we had no groom (same-sex marriage).  It took a bit of negotiation before we all agreed on dude of honor.

FRANCISDAWN2

Thanks for your comments everyone. Now that I see it in writing it does make so much sense to have them both MOH (maid and matron). I don't know how I could have considered having one in the wedding and not the other. Guess it just takes someone saying things back to you, like you all did, to realize what makes sense. Ok then its settled 2 MOH.

Grits8812

it is very appropriate for your daughters to be in your party.  

i say just dont give out titles. they can both be your bridesmaids.  or, if you want them to feel even more a part, make them both your maids of honor.

theres no rule for only having one

retz62

I don't know your situation at all, but in all honesty, what would you want to leave them with after your wedding is done and after you've left this earth.  At our age, we all have issues with people, and it's not always our fault, but my opinion is, if it's not in the best interest for all, find another solution.

My sister and I are close, but not close... I don't get her sometimes, and she is not excited about my wedding... but regardless, I aksed her to be my maid of honor, because it's the right thing to do.  She has been there for me a different times in my life, and she is not perfect, and I don't like alot of things she does, and I'm sure she doesn't like alot of things I do either... but nevertheless, I love her... and it's not all about me.  I have one sister and even though I have 100 friends I could ask to stand up, asking her was the right thing to do.

I don't think asking one daughter would be the kindest thing to do... in all honestly... I would find a way where they can both be in your wedding.  Hugs.