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Bringing a "bro date"

toblave13toblave13 member
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in Florida-North Florida
I was talking to a friend of FI the other night and he told me he's really excited about the wedding and he's already spoken to his friend Ian and that he's going to bring him as a "bro date" to have a wing man to hit on the single ladies and so he can drink up and party too. Granted he had been drinking, but I really didn't know what to say to this. I just kind of smiled and then we got interrupted. Tell me, am I wrong for thinking this is not okay? I don't want to tell my guests who they can and can't bring for their +1 but we're not offering guests a +1 so they can bring a frat buddy to drink our alcohol and eat our food. It is as a gesture so they'll have a date to dance with or to have someone to talk to if they don't know anyone. Oh, and this guy knows like 15 other people that are invited and who will most likely be coming. Am I being unreasonable?
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Re: Bringing a "bro date"

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    toblave13toblave13 member
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    edited December 2011
    Oh, and to clarify...I know I don't really have a say in who he brings...the post was more of a vent about it annoying me...
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    brittjoy84brittjoy84 member
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    edited December 2011
    Um, no. You are not obligated to invite a + 1 unless someone is married, engaged or in a long term relationship. If he is a single guy who knows other people there, you can just invite him and let him find that out when the invite is addressed to him only. You can even designate that 1 spot is reserved for him on the RSVP so he gets the clue. People are really just clueless.
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    toblave13toblave13 member
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    edited December 2011
    Well, we were planning to invite him with a +1 and he knows that so that's why he's planning ahead to bring his friend...so technically he can bring whoever he wants but the fact that he is going to bring his friend because "he wants to get some so he's not bringing a chick and he figures why not get his friend in on the free booze and food?" (his words not mine) is just really annoying to me...
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    jendawn80jendawn80 member
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    edited December 2011
    Yeah, I agree. If he's single and will know other singles there, then don't include a +1 in the invitation. We're doing that with a few people to keep the costs down. I think it would be different if he wasn't going to know anyone else there.  People just don't realize how expensive food and alcohol is! 
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    KornKittenBrideKornKittenBride
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    edited December 2011
    This isn't "wedding crashers" and you don't need a wing man at a wedding. I'd tell him I'm sorry, but due to occupancy and budget concerns that frat buddy can't come.That sucks. I don't know why people think they can invite whoever they want to someone else's wedding!
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    WAshley10WAshley10 member
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    edited December 2011
    I agree with KornKitten...While you shouldn't dictate who he brings, it's really rude for him to say what he did about the "free booze and food".  Based on THAT alone I would say no way.  And if you knows people that will be there, he doesn't need to bring a guest. I don't think you are being unreasonable at all.  I told FI about this and he agrees that it's rude.  I would talk to your fi and then both of you discuss the issue with your friend so he understands it's not just you being bridezilla kwim?
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