Florida-North Florida

I need help!!

How do you explain to a coworker that  she is not invited to your wedding? She knew that we had a limited budget and limited guest list, but is constantly reminding me mt wedding day is getting closer and closer. I am inviting a few of my coworkers that I am close with because we get together outside of work also. I'm not that close to her and her manners are what's the word.... non exsistent! I can't have that around our families at a formal affair. How do I explain this to her that I honestly cannot afford to add anymore people and we don't have the space at the venue either. I'm not mean but I really can't pay for it. Help Please!!

Re: I need help!!

  • LouWho19LouWho19 member
    edited December 2011
    Just explain it to her straight up - your guest list is limited because of financial reasons so you couldn't invite the entire office and you hope she can respect and understand that.  If she makes a rude comment and you call her out on it, my guess is she'll be embarassed and will shut her mouth!

    I would also suggest trying not to chat about the wedding at work since everyone is not invited.  We have a temp worker here for 3 months (she'll be gone by the time the wedding rolls around), so she's the only one in the office not invited...so I'm trying my hardest to not chat about it while she's around since it just makes things awkward!
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  • edited December 2011
    Just speak to it like a matter of fact.  That the reality is with your limited budget you couldn't invite everyone you might have liked to. Keep it short, sweet & sincere. Do not feel defensive or bad because that will encourage her to feel like it is wrong that she is not included or you wouldn't act defensive. Be polite & minimize the apologies, just stick to the fact it is what it is. 
  • edited December 2011
    Thank you, I actually haven't been talking about my wedding other than to my MOH who works with me but it's usually by email or text, the one i'm not inviting is the one who brings it up all the time. We have a new girl in the office she's been here about 3-4 mths and she asks me all the time too, but she knows she isnt invited but she already understands the cost and we don't know each other that well. I hope this talk goes well with her and thank you both for your help!
  • juicy318juicy318 member
    edited December 2011
    Okay- you may not need to say anything at all. She might not be trying to get an invitation. She just may be excited for you.

    The same thing happened to me at work- only ALL 15 of my coworkers just LOVED to talk about my wedding, and none of them were invited because I barely knew them when we were sending out invitations. Of course, we were friends by the time the day rolled around, and they just wanted to talk about it. No one had expected to be invited, and when I explained why they were not, they didn't really mind at all, and I kind of wished I just hadn't said anything at all. Some people are just excited about weddings. If she starts hinting that she is coming, then you have a problem on your hands.
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