Insane idea? Chicago & South Bend?

bridezillashandmaid

Hi all, new user here. I live abroad and have very little experience with planning weddings (and most of my friends don't either, so I don't have many people to ask their thoughts). I'd love to get your thoughts & opinions on something.

My fiance and I are trying to plan our wedding for January 2014. He is Catholic and I'm not, and he is pushing toward having our wedding ceremony at the Basilica at Notre Dame in South Bend, where he went to college. This is fine with me, except...

we want to have our reception in Chicago.

All of our guests will be coming in from out of town, and Chicago is the easiest place for everyone to gather. However, we need to organise buses for getting everyone (approx 150 guests) to South Bend for the ceremony and back for the reception. Fiance has agreed to sort the buses if we go with this option.

My concerns are, this is more logistical stress on top of a day that is already stressful, and, it being January, there is a strong possibility of snow throwing a wrench in our plans.

As we don't live in a Chicago parish, there is not really a possibility of having it at another church in the city.

I'd be grateful for any thoughts on the feasibility/lunacy of this plan.

KatWAG

Of course you can find a Parish in Chicago that will marry you. Have you even tried? St. Pat's is known for churning out weddings.

No one will want to fly into Chicago, Drive 2 hours to South Bend for a 30 minutes ceremony, drive 2 hours back to chicago for a reception and then get on a plane again. That is WAY too much to ask your guests. Personally I just wouldnt got to your ceremony and would spend the time exploring the city.

If Notre Dame is really important to you Fi then have your reception in South Bend.

I would say about 20 minutes is the most you cane resaonably ask your guests to travel between the ceremony and receptions.

bridezillashandmaid

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_illinois-chicago_insane-idea-chicago-south-bend?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:72Discussion:0a48d606-f57e-4aca-8c07-40fbb01b3f46Post:f2d87246-8305-4732-bfc7-84e0b483e450">Re: Insane idea? Chicago & South Bend?</a>:
[QUOTE]Of course you can find a Parish in Chicago that will marry you. Have you even tried? St. Pat's is known for churning out weddings. No one will want to fly into Chicago, Drive 2 hours to South Bend for a 30 minutes ceremony, drive 2 hours back to chicago for a reception and then get on a plane again. That is WAY too much to ask your guests. Personally I just wouldnt got to your ceremony and would spend the time exploring the city. If Notre Dame is really important to you Fi then have your reception in South Bend. I would say about 20 minutes is the most you cane resaonably ask your guests to travel between the ceremony and receptions.
Posted by KatWAG[/QUOTE]

Agree - dear Fiance however says he'd rather just get married in another city than find an unrelated church in Chicago. The sticking point is that we wouldn't be asking people to drive to SB, we'd be bussing them - he thinks this makes it more acceptable. I've looked at reception venues in SB and they aren't what I'd want... I just never thought I'd be having my wedding in that town...

I think I am going to have to push for Austin which is my preference.

KatWAG

Bussing does not make it more acceptable. It is still sitting in a vehicle (car, bus, train, etc) for a really long time doing nothing. But maybe drinking.

In fact, I have been to several weddings where the couple got marrried in the burbs and had their reception in the city (about a 30 minute drive.) The bride and groom thought they were being nice and considerate by putting champagne and beer on the bus for the trip back. Everyone was DRUNK by the end of cocktail hour.

If you move froward with this idea, I would make it a private ceremony for famiiy only.

Plus wouldnt you rather have more flowers or add a videographer or a second photogrpaher than pay for busses?

bellaluna290

OP, please take KatWAG's advice, as she has said everything that I would say.
Also, consider that you would be doing all of this in January and you have no idea twhat the road/weather conditions could be.

collsers

I got married in the Basilica, and it truly is an amazing place to get married. 

That said: it is extremely competitive to have your wedding there. They start booking for 2014 in a few weeks (I believe it is on March 4th this year), and all of the spots usually fill up on the first day. During most of the year, they have four weddings on each Saturday: 9am, 11am, 1pm, and 3pm. You would have very little control over what time your wedding will end up being (I got stuck with a 1pm wedding because someone got through the phone lines before me and booked the 3pm on our date). They do not have weddings on "busy" campus weekends (for January, the issue would just be the opening weekend of the semester, which they might not hold weddings because of students moving in) or on the weekends of certain feast days (so probably not 1/4/14 because of the Epiphany). It is an expensive church (when I got married the donation was $1000, plus $250 each for the organist and cantor). They are extremely strict in what they allow wrt flowers, decor, photography, etc, and you literally get 90 minutes in the church for ceremony and photos, and that is it (after all, the next wedding is starting right after yours). 

It is not the most dependable drive between South Bend and Chicago--traffic can make it take anywhere from 2 hours to 4 hours. January means heavy lake effect snow, which could throw a huge wrinkle in your schedule. 

If your groom is really set on the Basilica, I would consider having your reception in South Bend, but I would not try having it in Chicago. If you want any help with reception venues in SB, let me know. 

bridezillashandmaid

Thanks all, really helpful advice. In the end we decided that there are just too many ifs and whatifs to make it feasible and that coordinating the transport of 150+ people two hours each way for a one hour ceremony (in the dead of winter) is just crazy talk.

I think we are going to go with Texas. Again, thanks for the advice!