Dress shopping help - is this ok?

ewenner

Hello all! I need to start dress shopping soon (like two months ago), but two of my three bridesmaids live in other parts of the country, so I'd like to take my one local BM and another friend of mine from Chicago to go shopping with me. Is it ok to ask my friend who is not going to be a BM to go dress shopping with me? TIA for your advice!

Sparkette19

Does she know that she's not going to be a BM? I wouldn't ask her, but that's me. To be honest I think the smaller the group, the better. When I went dress shopping I just brought my mom. I didn't want too many people there all with different opinions.

jess&lane52804

I took my mom and MOH. We had a blast and everyone was very agreeable.

sschwege

I agree with pp the fewer people the better.  I actually went alone the first time because I wanted to figure out what I liked before hearing other people's opinions. 

beautifulnryan

I just went yesterday with 4 of my bridesmaids, my  mom, future MIL, and the flower girls and their mom's....along with that, the salon was a complete zoo...so it was a little stressful trying to figure it all out.  I definitely recommend, the fewer the better...then once you've narrrowed down to a few choices, then bring the girls out to try them on.

ewenner

Thanks for your thoughts so far. I am not worried about having too many people - my mother and sister/MOH both live across the country, as does the future MIL, so none of them will be there. It will actually be just my one local BM and perhaps the second Chicago friend who is not going to be a BM. What do you all think? Thanks again!

teamL09

I would definitely not ask the friend who is not standing unless she's really into your wedding and loves shopping and you know she wouldn't mind. I personally would be offended not having been asked to stand, but to run errands for the bride (I'd feel too bad saying no even if I was hurt). I would just make a decision with your local BM and tell the other girls to try it on in their location when you find it. Good luck!

ccokada

I'm pretty much in the exact same situation, except I have a little time before I have to start dress shopping. My mom and all of my bridesmaids live in different states. I think what I will do is go looking over christmas with my mom to get an idea of what I like. Then, when I come back, a friend of my fiance (who I am really very sure knows she will not be a BM) has offered to help with anything wedding related, so I was going to ask her to come. She also just got married this past year, so I think she would be really helpful. I guess to answer your question it just depends on the situation, but if you're sure your friend doesn't expect to be a BM, I think it's perfectly acceptable.

raeyn

I agree with ccokada. It depends on the situation, but if your friend is interested in your wedding plans and isn't expecting to be a BM, then I think it's fine. My mom, FMIL, and both bridesmaids live far away, so at first I thought I'd have to shop for my dress all by myself. But then a friend expressed that he really wanted to help me pick my dress so it worked out well. He's even coming to my fitting on Saturday and we're making a day of it!

TatiMarie

I really do think it depends on the situtation because I have a friend who I am close with with that will not be standing up in the wedding because I had to limit not having too many people.  However, she is constantly asking me if she can go dress shopping with me (she majored in fashion so she's really into clothes) and is always excited to hear what is new with my wedding planning, but honestly, in general, I don't think people really care (and they shouldn't!).  If you think she would sincerely be interested, then ask, but otherwise, it could be viewed as an errand and not something exciting.  Good luck! : )

cirrus319

I also had most of my bridal party/parents live all OOT. I do have a friend from high school that lives here and was definitely not expecting to be a bm, but still interested in my wedding plans come shopping with me once. We had a good time (we dont get to see each other too often, so we made a girls day of it), but I think its very situational and depends on the person.

ewenner

Thank you all for your advice! You guys are great!