Illinois-Chicago
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Catholic churches

Does anyone know which Catholic churches in the city and/or suburbs will let you get married without being a member of the church?  Neither mine nor my fiance's parents belong to churches anymore and it's important to us to have a church wedding.  We'll probably join somewhere eventually but probably not before we set up our venues for our wedding (unless we have to).  

Along those same lines, I guess we also need a church that will let us get married even though we already live together (or will be living together soon).  I know the church is not a fan of living together before marriage, but financially it didn't make a lot of sense for us to be paying rent in two different places.  Are there churches that are okay with that?

Any help you ladies have is much appreciated!    

Re: Catholic churches

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    edited December 2011
    I know for sure that Assumption Church and Old St. Pats you can get married there if you arent a member.  I am pretty sure there are a few more, but I'm not sure which. 

    As for living together, I just wouldn't mention it to the priest. I haven't done PreCana yet, so I don't know if its discussed or in what context.

    HTH!! 
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    edited December 2011
    St. Raymond's in Mt. Prospect is ok with both. We aren't members, and we live together. I didn't want to lie about it, so I asked flat out, and it wasn't a problem! Just did Pre-Cana this weekend, and they mentioned it briefly, but it wasn't an issue. I think a lot of the Catholic churches have come a long way!
    Amy :)
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    edited December 2011
    Different churches have different rules regarding membership, so you will probably have to speak to them individually.  What can also be complicated is whether or not you live in the parish where you will be married.  If you want to be married in a church outside of your parish, you will need to get special permission from the pastor in your parish to allow a preist from another parish to marry you.  This is regardless of whether you are a member of either church.  I would recommend you start looking into these requirements as soon as you can, because there can be some hoops to jump through.

    In regard to living together, please don't lie to the priest - I just feel like that's very disrespectful, and as PP mentioned, the church has come a long way!  When you register for Pre-Cana, you will need to register for "Special Pre-Cana," which is designed for couples who are over 30, have children from previous relationships, or who already live together.  When FI and I went to ours, everyone was very honest and open and accepting of all the  different situations people are in.  Best wishes to you!
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    amymellenamymellen member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You can also be married at the St. James Chapel at Quigley. It is downtown (Rush and Chestnut), but you will have to provide your own priest. We are being married there because our parish (depaul) did not have any dates available for 2010, even though we called more than a year out. Holy Name does the scheduling.
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    edited December 2011
    Our Church is St. Clement in Lincoln Park. You have to be a member there, but can join online. I think personally, I was glad we researched and looked into a Church we were going to join and stick with, because it meant more to get married there. (Just my opinion). We didn't live together when we went through Pre Cana, but they were pretty open about it. They said that they knew people had different reasons for things. But my PreCana was done by my actual Church, not the Archdiocese.
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    knthayerknthayer member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    For our church (St. Peter and Paul in Naperville), you or your FI, parents or grandparents have to be a member to immediately book a date. If not, you can still ask to get married there. You just might have to join (not difficult), and have a longer waiting period (not very long), and have to pay more.

    As for living together, we moved in together when we got engaged. Our priest saw the same address on forms we filled out, and didn't say anything. From what I hear, at PreCana they address living together. They don't tell you not to live together or cancel your wedding though. It's more about, um, not doing it until you're married. I'm sure that's a plesant conversation. Again, that's just what I heard from a friend who got married in another church.

    Good luck!
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    morgie44morgie44 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    St. Pat's in Joliet marries non members and the priest is really great!
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    edited December 2011
    St. Philip Neri in the South Shore area will marry non-members.  The priest is pretty cool.  As for living together, you will just need to do the Special Pre-Cana.  That's it.
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    edited December 2011
    We are not members but are getting married at Immaculate Conception at Harlem and Talcott.
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    aparada15aparada15 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Shrine of Our Lady of Pompeii in Chicago near Racine and Harrison (UIC area). I am in your same situation and am getting married there this June. Since it's technically a shrine now, it is not officially a parish, and therefore you do not need to be a parishioner to get married there. All we had to do was book a Special Precana for cohabitating couples and we were good to go! Also, the "wedding fee" is not as expensive as other churches in the city, about $750.
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    edited December 2011
    St.Hyacinth Basillica does not require you to be a member.
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    citybride09citybride09 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We were in the same situation and got married at Assumption Catholic Church with Fr. Doyle. They were fantastic and our ceremony was very personal even though Fr. Doyle had only met us a few times. Maxine, the music coordinator was very easy to work with and let us have my piano teacher play a special song she had written.

    Another perk if you are a summer wedding.. they have A/C!
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