Hawaii

Question about walking down the aisle

So here's the deal, my Dad died when I was 7 and I don't really have any male family members who could fill in for walking me down the aisle. At work I have what I call my "Work Dad". He is so excited baout me getting married and is always there for me when I need advice.
I'm okay with walking down the aisle alone BUT I was thinking about asking him to do it. He has daughters my age but they are sort of lost and making bad decisions right now. He always tells me he wishes they were more like me...I think it would mean a lot to him and I'm fine either way as it's not super symbolic to me.

Thoughts?

If I do ask him, do any of you have cool ways to do it?

THANKS!
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Re: Question about walking down the aisle

  • edited December 2011
    I say walk down with whoever you want.  Work dad, no one, or even just with DH.  Some guests might be confused, but that's OK.  Choose the person who is there to support you, and who you want supporting you through this journey.  If that's who he is for you, that's great.  However, to me, if you're indifferent, that's not 'good enough' -- I would prefer to walk with DH than with someone else.  Also, please don't assume you can fix his personal family pain by including him this way.  It's a nice gesture, but unless you two really have that close of a relationship, it might actually make him more sad that he might never have this at home.
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  • edited December 2011
    I agree! Choose whoever you want and if you do make sure it's someone who appreciates you and the relationship you have with them.
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  • fabutanfabutan member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Totally agree with others...  do what feels right for you.  Don't feel like you have to follow any traditions or "rules".  You might also want to talk to your mom first to see how she feels about having someone fill in for your dad.  I've also seen weddings where the bride had her mom give her away instead.

    At the same time, don't feel obligated to have someone walk you down the isle.  I walked down alone and had both my parents join me at the very end to give me away.  It just felt "right", because I've always been the independent type, but it still gave them a role.  Feel free to re-invent the rules and do whatever means the most to you.  :)

  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_hawaii_question-walking-down-aisle?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:73Discussion:09af6d39-78f0-46fd-a252-c7738d0f7a26Post:c92f0dd0-d79a-400b-af3c-f802fe9201fd">Re: Question about walking down the aisle</a>:
    [QUOTE]Feel free to re-invent the rules and do whatever means the most to you.  :)
    Posted by fabutan[/QUOTE]
    THIS!  I had both parents walk me down, but there was no "giving away"...that line irks me to no end, but that's just me.  And, fabutan makes a good point about checking with your mom!
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  • tiggy85tiggy85 member
    Sixth Anniversary 100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Hahaha yes my mom! I ran it by her and she was okay with it. I guess I will sit on it for a bit and play things by ear. Thanks for all the input :)
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image139 Were invited to paradise!
    image 39 Are ready to party!
    image 100 Are stuck on the mainland!
    image 0 Need to check their mail!
  • breanessbreaness member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I will be walking down hand in hand with FI :)

    Do whatever makes you happiest and whatever you will look back on the day with most happiness because of :)
  • kimmykupcakeskimmykupcakes member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Who walks you down is really up to you.  My dad passed away about 5 years ago.  Prior to that, we hadn't spoken in over 10 years.  I thought I would walk myself down the aisle, but instead I asked my daughter's godfather to walk me.  He was my mom's boyfriend for 8 years and really the closest I have to a dad.  He was really honored when I asked him.  He's also the only person who's offered to help us with the wedding. If he's who you want to ask to walk you, then do it. 
  • edited December 2011
    Ditto the ladies. I had both my parents walk me down - no real giving away either. Tradition is only good if it works for you. If your Mum has been a huge part of your life and you're close to her, I think it's a lovely way to honour her. That's why I had both parents walk with me. I just didn't think it was right... they're both huge parts of my life! I didn't want to pick and choose.
  • maui2011maui2011 member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I too will be walking down the aisle with both my parents...they both raised and i love them both so why decide...aren't options grand.  Bottom line...as everyone has mentioned do what works for you. HTH! J. :-)
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