Hawaii

FI's mom

So here's the latest with FI's mom. She still hasn't seen my ring. It's been 2 months, she lives 15 minutes from us and we've seen her more than once since the engagement. However, she is now starting to act how we thought she was going to, but than were completely shocked when she acted like we didn't get engaged.  Now she's asking a million questions and doesn't know when to stop.  She's driving FI crazy. As well as me, of course.

She calls FI on Easter to ask about the engagement party, when she can start inviting ppl to it, when she can start giving ppl the information for it and when she can give out our website to others. Bless FI's heart, but he isn't the best with these kinds of details, so he's having to tell her to hold on and ask me the answers. I'm getting annoyed with having to deal with that stuff right than because it's Easter and we are at our neighbors's house as their guests for a very short amount of time before we leave for dinner. Yes, I think he should have not taken her call at that time and instead should have called her back after dinner.

So he's putting her on hold and asking me the answers, back and forth, back and forth. I actually can't even believe what she is asking. First of all, the engagement party is being thrown by my mom, not us. Second, does she really think that she can invite whoever she wants to a party being thrown by someone else and that it's alright for her to be giving out this information to whoever she wants? Especially after saying her and FI's dad would only help us with strings attached and FI has already told them that we will be paying for and planning everything ourselves.

He relays everything that I have told him which is that my mom is throwing the party, his mom is not to invite or give out the information to ANYONE, everyone who is invited will get an invitation in the mail and on the invitation will be the information for the party, website and how to RSVP.  So she comes back with asking what if ppl happen to randomly find the website all on their own and just RSVP to the party without getting an invitation. More likely is her telling ppl about it even though we have told her not to. 

It's highly unlikely that any of FI's family members would think to randomly look up to see if we have a wedding website. They are all much order and not very skilled when it comes to the Internet or even computers for that matter.  Of the few that are younger, only 1 has gotten married and that was over 4 years ago.  They did not have a wedding website. Besides, the RSVP section on our website says "Once you have received your engagement party invitation from the mother of the bride" and you also need the password on the invitation to be able to RSVP. We are also having a password on the pages with all of the Maui wedding information just in case.  Even if ppl happen to "randomly" find the website it's not like it has the time and address of the party or that they would even be able to RSVP to it.

She was probably just trying to keep FI on the phone like usual since he kept telling her he had to go and that she needed to wait for her invitation and all other information she needs to know will be posted on the website following each invitation that goes out. She just wasn't listening to what he was saying and kept asking him the same questions over and over. He's also not able to tell her anything that we want to stay a secret because she will tell others.

UGH! I'm already tired of this stuff and we have only just begun. I can see why ppl run off and elope.

Re: FI's mom

  • breanessbreaness member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Yikes. That's so annoying :( She rubs me the wrong way for sure. Good thinking on password protecting the website. We didn't do that with ours but I feel like people understand what they're invited to. At least I hope so.
  • kimmykupcakeskimmykupcakes member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I feel like they do, too. We added it on because we felt it was better safe than sorry in case she did invite ppl we didn't invite.
  • AKWinterBrideAKWinterBride member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Ugh, his Mom sounds like a piece of work!  I hate that whole 'oblivious' thing, it's childish and ridiculous.  She needs to grow up and realize her son is a full grown man and she needs to let go.
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  • edited December 2011
    Sigh, I'm so sorry you have to go through this.  It's amazing to me some of the family personalities that come out due to weddings.  It's like, enough already, this is NOT ABOUT YOU.  :P  Hope it at least normalizes a bit soon.
    image
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.weddings.com/Sites/Weddings/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_hawaii_fis-mom?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:73Discussion:2e64704e-0e20-4714-b33c-9d0371984943Post:38580dfd-92b8-4128-942f-a17cd948a947">Re: FI's mom</a>:
    [QUOTE]Sigh, I'm so sorry you have to go through this.  It's amazing to me some of the family personalities that come out due to weddings.  It's like, enough already, this is NOT ABOUT YOU.  :P  Hope it at least normalizes a bit soon.
    Posted by Tanq&Tonic[/QUOTE]

    <div>This! I straight up had to say those 3 words to my mom. </div>
  • moonbunniemoonbunnie member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    She sounds really crazy! What makes her think she can invite people to a party that someone else is hosting? Or that it would be acceptable for people who were NOT invited to RSVP whether or not they 'just happened" to find the wedding website? I would never plan on attending a party I was not invited to. It's too bad when good guys come with not so great families.
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  • kimmykupcakeskimmykupcakes member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Yeah, I'm letting FI deal with her. I wouldn't want to say all the things I think about the way she acts. Did I tell y'all how during the time she wouldn't acknowledge that we were engaged that she told her sister that we were getting married on Maui and she could come. When FI told her she couldn't go she replied that since his dad wasn't going to come (yes, he's still saying he's not coming) that she could bring her sister in his place. He told her she could not. Ugh!
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