Delaware

*

*
??
Our little lightbulb is on the way!
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12 weeks 3 days


TTC since Oct 2011
Me: 33, hypothyroidism since 14, cleared all HSG, US, Pre-pregnancy panel tests.
Hubby: 36, testicular Ca, chemo April-May 2012.
Natural cycle IUI #1 with trigger and Progesterone Suppositories (Jun 2012) Neg
Natural Cycle IUI #2 with trigger and Progesterone Suppositories (Jul 2012) NEG
Aug 2012 - break due to needing a girls' weekend in Cape Cod
Natural Cycle IUI #3 with trigger and prednisone (Sep 2012) NEGATIVE
Switched fertility clinics - forced break Oct 2012
Natural Cycle IUI #4 (Nov 2012) no trigger, no progesterone, no prednisone (Nov 2012) - Neg
1st round Clomid Cycle IUI #5 (Dec 2012) - POS

Re: *

  • edited December 2011
    If you really believe that God doesn't exist, truly and wholeheartedly, then I believe that you should not be getting married in a church- especially since you are not doing it for either of you but to please someone else (at least, that's what I understood).

    If, however, you are just unsure and are willing to explore faith and God a bit more, then any pastor worth their salt will be willing to talk and work with you on that.  The whole point of the church and a decent pastor is to bring people to Christ, not turn them away.

    Your best bet, if you are trying to please everyone, may be to look into the Unitarian Universalist church.  They have different views on religion then most churches (more different than many realize).  There is one on 202, and one in Newark.  They will come to your venue, if you would prefer that.

    I hope that helps.  Being a strong person of faith (we chose to get married in the church- we are Lutheran, and it is not required of us like in the Catholic church- and attend every week -or at least try to, with all my health issues it's really hard at times-, having both been raised in the church), I understand the moments of doubt that everyone has.  I didn't step foot in a church for over a year and a half (longer if I am honest with myself), and I struggled with my faith for a long time.  That being said, after everything I have been through- medically, physically, emotionally- I am confident in my faith.  Please feel free to message me if you have any questions, including what churches may be accomodating to you considering your current belief and doubt in God.
  • edited December 2011
    I don't think you should lie at all about what you believe in. I think it really depends on the Church you go to also regarding whether or not they will push you to join their Church. Some religions are more strict then others. I know that for the Catholic Church you have to promise to raise your child Catholic even if you are not Catholic. 

    My fiance and I are getting married by a Catholic deacon and Rabbi . While they don't force either one of us to convert, we have to promise to raise our future children with a religious background and attend a marriage counseling (Pre Cana) weekend. My sister is marrying a guy who is Agnostic. They are getting married by a Catholic deacon. They have to attend a marriage counseling class also and promise to raise their future children with religious beliefs. So far they haven't had any problems with the deacon or anyone forcing religious views on him. I do know they have to answer a ton of questions about how they will raise any children, their moral beliefs, stance of family planning and finances. 

    No matter what you choose to do, make sure you feel comfortable with it because this is the bases for your marriage. You can't start a married life together disregarding your beliefs. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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