ahhhhh!!!

jennrose_03

My MIL thinks I am totally clueless and lost with all this wedding planning! Maybe I am, but Im finishing up nursing school and am taking my boards in like 2 months, and I think thats a LITTLE more important than my wedding in 10 months!!! I have all the major things done, like the church, reception hall, my dress, photographer, etc etc. its just the little things like decorations and what not that i havent had time to think much about yet! not a big deal, right? I have time! Plus, at least i have ideas on what i want to do!!! GRRRR. Anyways, my mil is wants us to do a unity candle, so I am willing to do it for her. My question is, can I? I am not baptized. My fiance is lutheran. And a judge is marrying us. So, can we do it?

leahlu

The unity candle isn't anything religious, as far as I am aware. You can do it. Just make sure it's something you and your fiance want to do, not just what you are being told to do.

hkiesling

The unity candle isn't even a religious thing.  It was added to many ceremonies around the 1930s, but its neither required nor limited to weddings of a certain faith.  It symbolizes the uniting of two individuals and/or two families into one.  I say go with your gut.  If you want it, have it.  If not, skip it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unity_candle

Oh, and you sound pretty on top of things so far.  As long as you have all your major things booked, then decorations can be saved towards the end.  Have you shown your FMIL the Knot checklist?  That might help.

ef7310

Just wanted to say that I sympathize with you! I'm taking step 1 of my med boards a month before our wedding next July, so I feel you on the "which is more important school or planning" conundrum. Just take it easy. Most everything can wait until after your exam. 8 months is still plenty of time to plan. Good luck studying!

In response to your question, like PPs said, it's not religious. It's totally up to you what you want to do, and you have TONS of time before you have to decide on ceremony details. We haven't even begun to think about what we're doing for the ceremony. Just do whatever makes you and your FI happy. It's your wedding after all. 

dc*prep

It sounds like you have a good amount done so far -- all the big things at least! I've been planning our decor and stuff for more than nine months now, and I've changed my mind a million times because I've had soooo much time to think (and rethink) things! You will be just fine!

beka0404

I have nothing to add in regard to the unity candle, but I know what it's like to have people pumping me for wedding info and having to reply with "well, school is my biggest priority right now" and then getting the blank stares that say "what? Your life doesn't revolve around your weddinnnnnng? Your speshul dayyyyyyy?"

(Sorry. Crankpants today.)

You will be fine! You have plenty of time! Keep on keepin' on with your school and think of all the lives you'll save in the future! (A little more important than centerpieces and such.)

jennrose_03

Thanks ladies! I appreciate all your feedback. it feels nice to know Im not the only one who feels overwhelmed by others asking so many damn questions! Ill get to is, sheesh! ugh. Im glad my own mom isnt riding me. I talked to her and shes like its your day you do what makes you happy, and your on track with everything. dont worry! good advice!