Alcohol at reception

nursecarissa

I've done a lot of reading about this topic, and most people commenting are widely offended at having a cash bar, or having an open bar only for a select amount of time.  Now, I don't know if this is something that varies by region or location?  Here in Minnesota every wedding I've been to has had a cash bar.  If they hosted anything at the wedding it was keg beer.  Or a lot have hosted a bar until a select dollar amount was gone, and then it was a cash bar.  Personally, I've never been offended by the idea...it seems like the norm.  I'm looking for ideas for my reception, they don't allow keg beer.  It's only bottled beer, wine, and mixed drinks.  The drink prices vary from $4-7 a piece.  We don't want our guests to pay for everything, so we're thinking of hosting $1,000 to the bar, or giving a certain amount of drink tickets per guest.  Any thoughts?   

dcprep

You're never going to find one "right" answer on this. In my experience, it seems to be somewhat regional. In Minnesota, I think it's somewhat acceptable to have a cash bar -- though it's nice if you can host something, like maybe just beer and wine, or even host everything during the cocktail hour. Whereas here in the Washington DC area, I have yet to attend a wedding that wasn't fully hosted.

We had a complete open bar all night, and it does get very expensive. Ours cost around $4,000-$5,000, I believe (for 100 people). So you need to evaluate what you can afford, and work around that. Don't go into debt over it. People appreciate the open bar, but they won't look back upon your wedding and immediately think, "Wow, that wedding sucked, because I had to pay for some of my drinks!"

Steph0871

DC Prep said it all very well.

On this board, a cash bar and/or partially hosted bar is usually ok.  We would have allowed a partial cash bar, but we have to supply all alcohol at our venue.  I see no reason with allowing your guests to purchase additional options.  But, if possible, host something.  Even if that's just a keg of cheap beer or wine for dinner, etc.  

However, for your sanity, don't ask this out on the national boards  I think it does vary greatly by region.  Every single wedding I've been to in WI and MN has had a partial cash bar.

saintpaulJess

Same as above.  It IS common in the region to have at least a partial cash bar.  Do what you can afford, and don't sweat it.

tklund

Pretty much every MN wedding I've been to has had a cash bar, and I have had no problem with it!  My sister had an open bar at her wedding, and it was pretty much exactly as dcprep said: $4-$5K for 100 guests.

Our wedding budget won't be able to include an open bar, but we will be hosting keg beer and wine for our guests, as well as pop and coffee for those who prefer not to drink.  Our wedding party and parents/siblings will have open bar though!

IMO, people are going to come to the wedding to celebrate the day with you and your FI regardless if there's an open bar or cash bar!

acw016

A cash bar is definitely pretty normal around here though most weddings I've been to lately have hosted a cocktail hour before dinner.  If you want to host but are worried about the bar tab I'd recommend finding a vendor who charges per head.  My vendor charges $18/head for unlimited drinks - beer, wine & cocktails. It's way cheaper than paying per drink & nice because I will know the total charge in advance.

hkiesling

You could always do a partially hosted bar.  Host N/A drinks, beer, wine, and one specialty drink (or some combination of that) and then cash bar for everything else.  I went to a wedding once where beer was hosted but my Coke was $4.  That didn't seem right to me.

bellaxanthe

Be careful with the signature drinks too. I Looked into that option and found that they were going to charge $7 per drink. Well that is equivalent to hosting for 1-2 hours. I didn't think it was worth it.

My experience here is that  partial cash bar is pretty expected. The last 5 or so weddings I went to had a hosted cocktail hour or two and then you were on your own.  Never thought twice about it.  I actually thought it was nice they offered even the cocktail hour since I know it's dreadfully expensive. The one hosted bar we went to people were fall down drunk.  Never seemed to be the case at the other weddings.

JennyLange

Like PP said, I think it is completely acceptable to do a cash bar. I usually expect a cash bar when I go to weddings, and if anything is hosted it's a bonus! Even if it is just beer and wine, one kind of beer, or only for a certain amount of time.
 

SuperRNluvsChef

We're bringing our own alcohol to the reception and hosting beer, wine and one cocktail.  Our budget also doesn't allow for a full open bar, and our reception venue doesn't allow cash bars.  But acutally the last wedding I went (my stepsister's in AL) was the first I've been to with an open bar with limited selections as everything was provided by the couple.  Most other weddings I've been to in the midwest area have had cash bars.   

Enchanted616

I would see what you can negotioate with your venue, too.  Ours wanted to charge $5-$9 per drink as well, and my mom was adament to have a per person rate.  We were so happy when they said $20 per person! 

LauraMC09

Take the advice above of course, but if your wondering between doing drink tickets or just a cap of $1000, I would choose to do drink tickets. I've been to many weddings where there are certain people who will take 4-5 drinks at a time because they know there's only a keg, or a $ amount limit. It ruins the whole idea, and makes it so the less "outgoing" guests don't get any drinks. Make it so you only get charged for tickets that are redeemed, so you aren't paying for tickets that never got used. It seems more fair to me that a certain $ amount.

shan87

tklund: I would advise against allowing WP and Family special treatment over the rest of your guests. I was a BM in my friends wedding and she did this for us as a favor/thank you. It is a much better Idea then when its executed. Other Guests noticed I was getting drinks for free and started hassling me to get them drinks too. It got super obnoxious and I ended up leaving the Reception early because it ruined my night.
I would recommend giving them tickets to redeem instead hopefully that way people wont bug them.
Just a Thought.


As for us- we are hosting Keg Beer, 1 Choice of White Wine, 1 Choice of Red Wine, Pop and Coffee. The rest is cash.

Depending on where you are in MN- My Aunt hosted the bar at my Cousin's wedding she was going to shut it down at $3000 but they never reached that. The Hall was just that cheap. $3 mixed drinks and $2 beer.

tklund

shan: thanks for the advice; I understand it could be a problem with guests bugging our wedding party, but they are adults and can decide how they want to handle getting bugged by guests for free drinks.  Our whole wedding party is our siblings and their spouses, and FI & I feel they should have special treatment for being so important in our lives.  We're not completely decided on what we want to do, just trying to offer up ideas for others!  :-)

As long as everyone's having a good time, that's all we care about! :-)

shan87

tklund- sorry I didn't mean any offense. I should have just put thats what happened to me. I don't know for sure but I think we were the only ones with hosted bar. So that compounded the problem. If you are offering other hosted stuff perhaps it wont be a problem.

tklund

No problem--no offense taken whatsoever!  :-) Your situation sounded so not fun at all, and I appreciate another view of what could happen.  Thanks!

I Want Cake

I agree with the PPs who said it's okay to have a cash bar or only beer/wine hosted.  Nobody will be offended.

But please, whatever you do, do not make people pay for sodas, especially if you're hosting liquor.  This can get overlooked.  The non-drinkers and kids (and their parents) will appreciate it.

graysquirrel

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_alcohol-reception?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:81Discussion:3d7014e5-2477-4d68-8f0c-b6e9fda36fb0Post:299e7fde-71c7-43f9-84fd-0845a8a11e96">Re: Alcohol at reception</a>:
[QUOTE]Take the advice above of course, but if your wondering between doing drink tickets or just a cap of $1000, I would choose to do drink tickets. I've been to many weddings where there are certain <strong>people who will take 4-5 drinks at a time because they know there's only a keg, or a $ amount limit</strong>. It ruins the whole idea, and makes it so the less "outgoing" guests don't get any drinks. Make it so you only get charged for tickets that are redeemed, so you aren't paying for tickets that never got used. It seems more fair to me that a certain $ amount.
Posted by LauraMC09[/QUOTE]

This is very true! If there are unlimited drinks for a certain time period, people will get multiples so they don't have to pay.
I think that it is nice to have at least beer and wine be covered for your guests. I don't like the idea that people should have to pay for drinks at a party, which is what a reception is. I don't make people pay when they drink at my house; I'm not going to at my wedding either. However, if your budget cannot afford to host anything, it is better to have some than not for most people. People tend to be more upset when they can't get some vs paying for it, so do what is right for you.