Why weren't people there?!

allychase

So now following my shower I'm overcome with a desire to know why 22 out of the 46 people invited didnt come! I know maybe its rude and none of my business and I know of a few that had prior plans but I feel like once I posted the photos to Facebook whoever didnt come would be like Oh sorry we couldn't make it, we were doing... Whatever! You know? Idk maybe its just me but if I'm invited to a party and can't make it I let them know as soon as possible. I heard my one aunt didnt come cause she didnt have money for a gift, which annoys me because I don't care about that and I haven't seen her in months. Her sister got me a cheap bottle of wine cause she's been low on cash and it was perfect.. All I cared about was seeing her! My one cousin never even RSVPd either way despite multiple messages sent to her and she has definitely been on FB to see them, which is annoying too cause I just went to her baby shower last year and spent a fortune, I feel like she couldve at least RSVPd. This is just curiosity more than anything.. And a rant. And possibly a little bridezilla ish lol. Anyone else have similar frustrations?

LuckyGirl1713

People definitely should have RSVPed to the party.  I know its hard for people who don't have money and they are afraid of not bringing a good enough gift.  I know its frustrating but just make sure that you give big thank yous to the ladies that did come to your shower!

ChiGirl2013

I wouldn't know.  I was told I'm not getting a shower because our destination wedding is small and "it's just not worth it" to have a shower when only 18 guests would be invited.  Be thankful you had 24 who showed up to party with you.

tiny speck

I don't know, I'm in the "be thankful that people did come" boat. The people who didn't rsvp at all should have, yeah that's annoying, but I think it's a bit unreasonable to expect an apology and an excuse from those who weren't able to come.

vk2204

So 22 people did not RSVP at all?

orangehills

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_why-werent-people-there?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:8f950fe7-0127-47c9-aca2-16f514095664Post:b9e257fb-d7e7-4b4b-8f62-d2659b74cc0d">Re: Why weren't people there?!</a>:
[QUOTE]I wouldn't know.  I was told I'm not getting a shower because our destination wedding is small and "it's just not worth it" to have a shower when only 18 guests would be invited.  Be thankful you had 24 who showed up to party with you.
Posted by ChiGirl2013[/QUOTE]

18 guests invited to the shower or to the wedding? There will only be 11 people at my shower! It's just a tiny intimate thing, since only 26 people will be at the wedding lol 18 is plenty for a shower!

adawn1981

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_why-werent-people-there?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:8f950fe7-0127-47c9-aca2-16f514095664Post:1383f571-a8d0-4d35-a4ad-3d1d298e68b6">Re: Why weren't people there?!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Why weren't people there?! : 18 guests invited to the shower or to the wedding? There will only be 11 people at my shower! It's just a tiny intimate thing, since only 26 people will be at the wedding lol 18 is plenty for a shower!
Posted by orangehills[/QUOTE]

There are only 15 invited to mine - and that includes me and the girls throwing it!  13 people total are able to make it, just my female family, FI female family and 3 friends were invited.  It would be fun to have a big shower, but I am happier with a smaller shower :)  Less people pulling you different ways in different directions when you are just trying to have fun and soak it all in!

ChiGirl2013

It would be 18 females invited to the shower, since that's pretty much every woman that's also invited to the wedding.  Not all would come, of course.  But you have to understand my family - it's like that movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding, only we're not Greek.  EVERYTHING is done on a huge scale.  My baby shower had close to 70 people there - and that's not counting the ones who couldn't make it.  It was held at a banquet hall and was probably very similar to what some of us are planning for a wedding reception.

I would be beyond the moon excited if even 10 people showed up for a wedding shower that was held in my honor.  I sort of feel like it's a rite of passage, part of the whole wedding experience.  I don't care about gifts, since FI and I have lived together for nearly 8 years now.  We have everything we need.  I just love the comraderie and the opportunity to hear people talk about their own weddings, give me advice, and all that stuff.  I know the DW and the size of the guest list were our coice, and that I shouldn't EXPECT anything from anyone..... it just sucks when people tell you that your wedding isn't important enough.  Oh well.  Those of you having showers, enjoy them a little extra because you're very lucky to be having one at all.

allychase

I'm not complaining that there were 24 people there, I just wish there was some acknowledgement of me inviting them at all. I didn't say I expect an apology, they didn't *have* to come it just seems proper to say SOMETHING like "oh we got the invite, but we had to do ___ "  to either me or my aunt, the host. Trust me the shower was perfect, I'm extremely greatful, I'm just wondering why almost half of the guest list ignored it...

I think most of the 22 people did RSVP but the ones that didn't my aunt was tracking down for the past week before the shower and they just ignored her. And some of the ones who didn't RSVP were people whose showers/weddings I have previously attended and gave generous gifts to.. At least acknowledge that you freakin received the invite! Idk to me it's just common courtesy. 

I'm worried now about wedding RSVPs from these people, cause if I track them down to no avail and they show anyway, sorry buddy but there won't be a seat or meal for you...

vk2204

Ohhhh I get it now. I thought those people just didn't show. I would be upset as well. I had a few people who declined and didn't say why and I was pretty bummed.

Half of FI's side is OOT and I had to ask my FMIL to get a hold of them because NONE of them called my mom. Our invite was regrets only so if you don't call we assume you are coming. They just didn't care enough to call and let us know they weren't coming.

joheryl

It happens. I was in a wedding last fall and two bridesmaids didn't rsvp yes or no to the bridesmaid throwing the shower (FSIL of the bride)  and did not go.  I thought it was very rude especially considering they were in the wedding.