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Money

So out of pure curiosity and nosiness, how are you paying for your wedding?  Are your parents/grandparents paying?  Have you and/or FI saved up and have funds ready to go?  Will you take out a loan?

I'm starting to get worried we're not able to pay for this wedding.  Really, I just need some encouragement from my fellow knotties.  We're paying for everything ourselves and don't have a lot saved up yet.
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Re: Money

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    courtney1188courtney1188 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My parents have very generously offered to pay for my outfit, as well as the majority of the reception (food, bar, venue fees, etc), and his parents gave us a set amount which should cover the band, photographer, and florist. FI and I are paying for remaining things like decor, chair covers, honeymoon, transportation, officiant, favors, etc. But we are very fortunate that our parents are able to help and want to, I've been brainstorming dieas for very nice thank you gifts for them!

    If we were paying for it ourselves we would just wait a bit longer...or FI would end up paying for most of it, since he works for his family business and will eventually be the owner, while I'm struggling to find something with a lot more hours than my current job can give me.
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    bee&beebee&bee member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My FI and I are paying for most everything.  My dad is gifting me with my dress and offered some other funds (we don't know the amount yet) and my FI parents also said they would be helping but did not give an amount.  So, we are planning as though we are covering everything on our own.

    We have very little saved up at this point, that is our goal this year is to bank a lot of money, all the deposits are down so we have over a year to save up for the balances.  We are Not using credit cards or taking out a loan, I refuse to have more debt than we already have. 

    I suggested to use this years tax returns to pay down some of our debt, then next year to use them towards the wedding. 

    Best of luck!
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    lisa89760lisa89760 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We are paying for the majority of the wedding...my dad is giving me some money and my mom gave me some and is paying for the majority of my dress. my FI parents have offered to pay for some of the alcohol and the rehersal dinner. 
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    edited December 2011
    My father offered to pay for about half of the Venue/dinner cost.  Fi's mother mentioned that she may be throwing in some money as well, but it's not guaranteed and I'm not sure how much....so I'm planning as though that money is not there. 

    I'lll be paying for most everything else.  I'm saving a certain amount from each paycheck that goes right into the wedding account.  And I"m also paying for things in cash as I go.  The goal is that I won't have to finance ANY of the wedding AND that I'll be able to pay off my personal credit card prior to our wedding day.

    I'm hoping that FI will save up and pay for the honeymoon.  I travel for work, so I'm using my airline miles to pay for the flights....so he'd just need to pay for our week at the all-inclusive.

    Oh...and my mom paid for my wedding dress.  : )
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    edited December 2011
    We are very lucky as FIs parents are helping us out a lot. But FI and I are paying, too. We looked at what we could save each month, set up a separate bank account, and have automatic transfers to the account. This way there is no temptation to borrow from the wedding fund (mainly for me cause I am the spender, he is the saver). Its been way easier to manage our expenses and keep on track with our budget.
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    edited December 2011
    My mom bought my dress which was a surprise. Everything else we have/ are still saving up for.  We are really fortunate to both have decent paying jobs so it wasn't an issue for us to save for. I just budgeted according to what we could save up.  Neither of our parents have offered any assistance besides my mom buying the dress.  My parents don't have any money really so I wasn't expecting it but FI really thought he parents would say something but they haven't and its OK.  We feel good knowing that we are able to afford it all on our own.
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    Thumper1148Thumper1148 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We are paying everything ourselves.  This is a second marriage for both of us, so we  already knew that if we wanted to have a wedding it was going to be up to us.  We have over half of it saved at this point and most of our deposits down.  We will not be taking any loans or credits out to pay for the wedding.
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    lcsnowflakelcsnowflake member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We're paying for our wedding.  My parents told me a long time ago that they would help me through school, but my wedding would be up to me and FI.  FMIL offered to pay for the rehersal dinner and the honeymoon, since that is traditional.  FI's parents also offered to throw us some extra money since FI still has student loans.  We just made sure we had a firm budget and that we stick to it.  Creating a budget was the first thing we did and it was difficult, caused a lot of fights, but was worth it.
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    sasha213swsasha213sw member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We are paying for 90% of our wedding. This is the main reason we are getting married in 2012 instead of this year.
     My FMIL offered to give us $5000 which is awesome. Only stipulation on that is that any wedding gifts come out of that money - totally not a big deal. She offered to throw a shower for us (but so did my BM's) and that would have come out of our $5000 as well. FI and I decided we would rather use the money for our reception so we declined her offer to throw our shower. FFIL hasn't said either way so we are not counting on any. My dad has already given us some money, but honestly I'm not expecting any more since he is retired and on a fixed budget.
    We went in with the attitude that we are paying for our wedding and everything else family wants to give is just a bonus.
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    edited December 2011
    FI's parents generously decided to give us a pretty nice lump sum, and my parents are also contributing a bit.  I've basically built our budget around those two amounts and then anything that we're going over on will be something that we'll pick up ourselves.

    Edited, I kept spelling generously wrong.
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    rak123rak123 member
    First Anniversary First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    My parents gave us a lump sum, which was very nice of them.  Their money will cover most of the reception cost.  Everything else, we will be paying for.

    FI's dad said he would give us a huge amount of money, but I don't know if we will accept it or not.  If he insists on giving it to us, we may just ask that it is given to us after the wedding, and it will just go into our savings account.  FI's dad was drunk when he made the offer, so I am not sure if he is serious or not since it hasn't been discussed since then.  We are not counting on it and we don't really need it. 
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    edited December 2011
    We are paying for our wedding for the most part. My Mom is buying my dress and accessories and my Dad gave us some money (about $1000). His parents are paying for the rehersal dinner (although they put a limit on the amount they would contribute for it). Luckily, we had a chunk of money saved that will cover about half and we've been putting away money here and there for the past 2 years since we got engaged. The rest, I am counting on our tax returns...keeping my fingers crossed. But I am starting to get nervous too, I just keep telling myself everything works out.

    It is nice that we are paying for pretty much everything else because that way we can decide the final choice on everything and don't have others opinions. We had that problem with FI's family and the rehersal dinner, choosing a place to stay within their limit and I wouldn't want that through the whole planning process.
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    floraallfloraall member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We bought a new house this past year so we are using our $8000 tax credit toward the wedding. My parents saved up $10,00 to give us, FI's mom is paying for a photobooth and 1/3 of our photographer's fee, and FI's dad gave us $500 (we weren't expecting any help from him). I guess we are just trying to bedget carefully for the rest. Just paying for things as they come up. Hopefully we won't have to dip into our avings too much.
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    edited December 2011
    I am paying for the wedding entirely by myself. Unfortunately with the economy my mother lost her job 2 years ago and how now opened her own store to try to bring income in.  My father came out of a 17 year retirement and just recently started a new job driving a truck across the country to help pay for their bills.

    FI is responsible for the honeymoon.

    If you ever meet me in person and it looks like my eyes are sunk in or have dark circles, just know it's because I've been working as much OT as I can.
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_money?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:8ecf74b1-b4e3-4a9c-aa11-64cb9511221ePost:04c2358d-ddd0-4ee2-8ece-05103334daa9">Money</a>:
    [QUOTE]So out of pure curiosity and nosiness, how are you paying for your wedding?  Are your parents/grandparents paying?  Have you and/or FI saved up and have funds ready to go?  Will you take out a loan? I'm starting to get worried we're not able to pay for this wedding.  Really, I just need some encouragement from my fellow knotties.  We're paying for everything ourselves and don't have a lot saved up yet.
    Posted by mrsbunyip[/QUOTE]


    I am with you on this one. We are paying for the wedding ourselves. We had to cut a lot of things out. For example, we are making our cupcake tower, not having transportartion, limiting the guest list to family only (even cutting out kids and other family members), no programs, no save the dates, sending invites to 1 per family (even if they live in different places) and a bunch more.

    I promise you will be able to save it up. We are living on my income only, and have been for the last 3 years. I have been working full time, planning and going to school full time in order to make this work. and as of right now we are only shy 1,415 dollars  which in order to make it, is 102 dollars a week until our wedding.
    trust me, its hard work but it will be worth it in the end. YOU CAN DO IT!! :]
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    missmelanie81missmelanie81 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My fiance works for Fords and they are gettting a nice profit sharing check soon (about $5000) so we will use that. Also FI mom/dad have said they will pick up a big chunck of the bill. I dont know just how much  yet....but Im hoping between that and our money we should have it covered.
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    Sue-n-KevinSue-n-Kevin member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My parents gave us $1000 for the venue. We are paying for everything else ourselves. I started a savings account several months ago, and have transferred funds into it from my direct deposit paychecks whenever possible (not enough, or often enough for me!). I'll put part of my federal refund into it also.
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    edited December 2011
    We are paying for most of the wedding ourselves.  We just figured out the budget and we both put money into our savings account each month.  My mom bought my dress and FI mom is paying for the cake, alcohol, and photobooth.  His dad is giving us about 10,000  after the wedding and we will just put that back into the account.  We refuse to charge anything or take out a loan, bc we don't want debt and it really isn't necessary.  So far, we have everything covered.  Fi is paying for the honeymoon himself.   
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    larzhopelarzhope member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My parents are extremely old school and traditional... they want to have a say in practically everything and have made it clear they don't think its appropriate for Fi and I to be contributing a DIME to the wedding.  It is very generous of them, and we really appreciate the funds.  On the flipside, our wedding would be much smaller and scaled back if we were paying for it ourselves because a big wedding simply isn't super important to either of us - but their money, their say.  Luckily we haven't butted heads too much and its been a pretty peaceful planning process.  I think my parents are surprised with how laid back I've been...
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_money?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:8ecf74b1-b4e3-4a9c-aa11-64cb9511221ePost:b1dd1424-a9c2-4d7f-9f39-afe499bb0750">Re: Money</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Money : I am with you on this one. We are paying for the wedding ourselves. We had to cut a lot of things out. For example, we are making our cupcake tower, not having transportartion, limiting the guest list to family only (even cutting out kids and other family members), no programs, no save the dates, sending invites to 1 per family (even if they live in different places) and a bunch more. I promise you will be able to save it up. We are living on my income only, and have been for the last 3 years. I have been working full time, planning and going to school full time in order to make this work. and as of right now we are only shy 1,415 dollars  which in order to make it, is 102 dollars a week until our wedding. trust me, its hard work but it will be worth it in the end. YOU CAN DO IT!! :]
    Posted by tlancaster89[/QUOTE]

    <div>That's pretty much what it is boiling down to for us.  I'm going to start saving half my paycheck each week (I only work part-time and don't make a lot), and we'll be living of off hubby's paycheck.  I'm going to open a bank account where I can't touch the money and be tempted to use it for other things.  Thanks for the motivation! :)</div>
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    edited December 2011
    We're paying for most of it ourselves but my grandma is paying for my dress and FI mom is paying for limos, giving a $1000 toward the reception, and paying for our hotel the night of the wedding. I just got done paying off my car so that really helped us out and FI and putting a certain amt aside each month for the wedding. 
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    MMRoberts11MMRoberts11 member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    So out of pure curiosity and nosiness, how are you paying for your wedding?  My FI and I are paying for just about everything.
    Are your parents/grandparents paying?  My parents MAY be helping with my dress and my FI's parents are paying for the rehearsal dinner.  Neither can really afford to help much.
    Have you and/or FI saved up and have funds ready to go?  We are paying as we go.  Luckily, we have almost all our vendors already so we have time to save and pay all of them by at least the day of the wedding.
    Will you take out a loan? No.  I refuse to go into debt to pay for a day.

    Don't feel like you are alone.  My FI and I have nothing really saved and are trying to pay things as we can so there is no price shock.  It's why we picks a 20 month engagement.
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    edited December 2011
    We are fortunate enough to have some help, but my FI and I are paying majority of the wedding, with not much saved, and I'm okay with that.. We have put deposits down here and there and I reeeeeally like how many things do not need to be paid until a month before the wedding or less - I'm not saying I like waiting to the last minute BUT it does give us some more time to save. I do not want to take out loans, and I'm hesitant about using my credit card without having money to pay it off, BUT the best thing I can do and tell YOU to do is...

    DO NOT STRESS ABOUT IT.

    I have anxiety problems and I know that stressing about the biggest day of my life would just do way more harm than good. I'm confident that my FI loves me for me and would marry me today if we didn't want to have a nice wedding day to share with family and friends (plus, it's 11/11/11!!).. I'd rather look back on my wedding happy about marrying my best friend, feeling/looking fabulous, and surrounded by people I love than to worry about how my wedding caused my marriage to start off in debt. Money isn't everything.

    Definitely look into the Budget Wedding board for more ideas, if you haven't already. Whether you want to spend $2,000 or $20,000 there are suggestion tips on how to save (i.e. use silk flowers instead of real ones! SOOOO MUCH CHEAPER!) and I know my FI and I want to save not only for the wedding, but for the marriage so every tip helps! 

    Best of luck! xox
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    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_money?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:8ecf74b1-b4e3-4a9c-aa11-64cb9511221ePost:c437ad5e-1611-4385-8c68-72cee89e426b">Re: Money</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Money : That's pretty much what it is boiling down to for us.  I'm going to start saving half my paycheck each week (I only work part-time and don't make a lot), and we'll be living of off hubby's paycheck.  I'm going to open a bank account where I can't touch the money and be tempted to use it for other things.  Thanks for the motivation! :)
    Posted by mrsbunyip[/QUOTE]


    Your welcome. I know first hand how hard it is. My fiance has been out of a job since
    December 2008. I recently got him in to my compnay at a different location. However, he is only working 1-2 days a week at like 4 hours each. It's hard but it will be worth it in the end. 
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