Michigan-Detroit

Married Ladies - License Question

Hey, ladies!  Just wondering - how long was it between when you got married and when you received your official copy of the marriage license in the mail?  We're at about a month now, and the bank won't let us deposit our gift checks without it.  I'm getting antsy, but I don't want to be calling and harrassing some poor clerk if this is perfectly normal.

We're in Wayne County, if you're wondering.
Thanks!
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Re: Married Ladies - License Question

  • larzhopelarzhope member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Melissa, I went on oakland county's website and requested it a week after the wedding and it was at our home in washington less than a week after that.
  • emarston1emarston1 member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Have you requested one? It didn't come automatically, I had to request and pay for one (Oakland county.). Did your officiant mail it in quickly? If youve requested one and it still hasn't arrived, you could always call and ask.
  • matuofmmatuofm member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_married-ladies-license-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:d4bf277b-9ff0-4826-9a0d-7749d982370dPost:960c6eb1-fcff-4262-8f3e-0a008474d88a">Re: Married Ladies - License Question</a>:
    [QUOTE]Have you requested one?<strong> It didn't come automatically, I had to request and pay for one (Oakland county.).</strong> Did your officiant mail it in quickly? If youve requested one and it still hasn't arrived, you could always call and ask.
    Posted by emarston1[/QUOTE]


    Hmm.  That's interesting.  I would swear that our officiant told us that two copies would be sent out as soon as they were processed - one to him, and one to us.  That's how FI remembers it, too.  But it was 4-6 months ago when we had this conversation...maybe we're just remembering it wrong.  How embarrassing would that be ?!?  I'll have to check it out.  :P
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  • edited December 2011
    I never received one, either.  I just requested one last week.
  • edited December 2011
    They won't accept the one you got at the wedding?  My bank took that... I actually changed my name there before anywhere else, lol.
  • emarston1emarston1 member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_married-ladies-license-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:d4bf277b-9ff0-4826-9a0d-7749d982370dPost:43ec3088-29a6-48cc-bffe-847689dac096">Re: Married Ladies - License Question</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Married Ladies - License Question : Hmm.  That's interesting.  I would swear that our officiant told us that two copies would be sent out as soon as they were processed - one to him, and one to us.  That's how FI remembers it, too.  But it was 4-6 months ago when we had this conversation...maybe we're just remembering it wrong.  How embarrassing would that be ?!?  I'll have to check it out.  :P
    Posted by matuofm[/QUOTE]
    We got a copy of the thing we signed at the ceremony but this isn't what the state sends you (IIRC, the officiant sent it to us.)  The one that the state sends you is much more "official" looking.  I was told (which might not be true) that <em>this</em> is THE official marriage certificate which you have to request from the state before you do anything.  The piece of paper that is the one you signed from the ceremony really doesn't do a whole lot (again from what I was told.)

    Things may be different in Wayne County though, this was all done through Oakland.  This was also for all my name change things.  As Abbey pointed out, you may be able to use the non-official copy for your bank to deposit checks.
  • edited December 2011
    Not sure about Wayne County rules, but I went to Oakland County office and got copies the same day. I also ordered a few extra copies and it took about 4 days via mail.
  • matuofmmatuofm member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_married-ladies-license-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:d4bf277b-9ff0-4826-9a0d-7749d982370dPost:725e67b0-14ca-4275-8f75-f68d5f4bde23">Re: Married Ladies - License Question</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>They won't accept the one you got at the wedding?</strong>  My bank took that... I actually changed my name there before anywhere else, lol.
    Posted by abbeylynne06[/QUOTE]


    No, BoAmerica is telling us that each branch has its own set of rules regarding deposits and what they'll accept, so they can't give us a blanket statement about what they need - but that it's likely that we'll need the original certificate. 

    When we called individual branches in order to lock down which ones might deposit the checks without it, they all gave us a bunch of lawyerspeak - like they were trying to protect themselves in case of getting sued later.  None of them were willing to state definitively that they'll accept the one we signed at the wedding - or even that they'll accept the official one. 

    DH spent literally 20 minutes on the phone with one manager, having this conversation: DH: "So we can deposit the checks if we have the one we signed at the wedding?"  Manager: "It would help if you have some official document with you."  DH: "So we need the officlal wedding certificate?"  Manger "Some official document would help."  DH: "Is there any other document that would count as official?"    Manager: "Not that I know of."  DH: "Okay.  So if we bring the official marriage certificate, you'll deposit the checks?"  Manager: "It would help."    DH: "Well, what do you mean, 'it would help'? Do I need something else?"  Manager: "Not that I know of."  DH: "So if we bring the certificate, you'll deposit the checks?"  Manager: "It would help."    DH: "Okay, I need to know for sure that you'll deposit these before I drive all the way out there.  We probably need an official document, and there's nothing else you know of that you require.  So if I bring the official certificate in, WILL YOU deposit the checks?"  Manager: "Well, it would help."

    This is the point at which DH hung up.  We decided that since he was leaving for his business trip anyway, by the time he'd gotten  back we would have received the official certificate and we'd go in and try to get this sorted out.  Now that he's back, we're jumping in.  Sigh.
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  • sheshedukeshesheduke member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I ordered mine offline the week after the wedding and I got them the next day. Wayne county is slower but I am sure you have to order them because they don't give stuff for free. I hope you get it soon a month later for check cashing sucks.
  • edited December 2011
    matuofm, 

    Find a new bank to work with.  BofA is not worth your trouble. 

    <3 

    zulamay
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  • matuofmmatuofm member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_married-ladies-license-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:d4bf277b-9ff0-4826-9a0d-7749d982370dPost:b8c0227f-cd68-4851-ba86-44a546813d34">Re: Married Ladies - License Question</a>:
    [QUOTE]matuofm,  Find a new bank to work with.  BofA is not worth your trouble.  <3  zulamay
    Posted by zulamay[/QUOTE]

    Definitely not disagreeing with you.  ;)
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  • lisa89760lisa89760 member
    Fourth Anniversary 500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I had to go in to get my license (oakland county)  It took about 4 days for the county to recieve the signed copy from the church.
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  • lovetruly06lovetruly06 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
     We did our online and when went to pick it up and the County office they gave me three copies. Two our pastor mailed out and the thired one was for us. But my sister got married a few months ago and had to wait like 2-3 weeks I think. If you haven't gotten it by now I would call and ask at least. It cant hurt anything.
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  • emarston1emarston1 member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_married-ladies-license-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:88Discussion:d4bf277b-9ff0-4826-9a0d-7749d982370dPost:b891a7d3-6fb8-416b-a3df-bbb5abd9c7ef">Re: Married Ladies - License Question</a>:
    [QUOTE] We did our online and when went to pick it up and the County office they gave me three copies. Two our pastor mailed out and the thired one was for us. But my sister got married a few months ago and had to wait like 2-3 weeks I think. If you haven't gotten it by now I would call and ask at least. It cant hurt anything.
    Posted by lovetruly06[/QUOTE]

    This isn't the official copy we are talking about (at least I wasn't.)  Many places won't accept this copy as <em>The Official</em> copy because it isn't processed by the state after the ceremony.  You will need to request an Official copy after your wedding from the county.
  • edited December 2011
      I had to go pick up a copy of it at the county clerk's office (I'm in Washtenaw) a week after the ceremony. But, we opened new accounts under both of our names at a local credit union with the copy of the marriage license we got after the ceremony (not the official copy). They had no problem depositing checks before my name was officially changed. They just had me endorse it as it was written on the check (in my married name) and then had me sign below it with my maiden name. Once I had my new license and the official marriage certificate, they changed my name on the account to my married name.
  • edited December 2011
    Ok, I just sorted this out myself from reading all of this:

    1. In Oakland county, you get 3 copies, one for the county, one for the state, one for you.  As Liz says, this is not the "official-official" copy but just a record of the marriage.
    2. In Oakland county, you can request an "offiicial-official" copy online (and have it mailed to you) at this site: http://www.oakgov.com/clerkrod/vitalrecords/birth_death_marriage_certificates.html

    It costs $20. 

    Hope that helps!
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  • lovetruly06lovetruly06 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_married-ladies-license-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:d4bf277b-9ff0-4826-9a0d-7749d982370dPost:be30d0ad-aa3b-47fb-a9d8-b446e773808c">Re: Married Ladies - License Question</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Married Ladies - License Question : This isn't the official copy we are talking about (at least I wasn't.)  Many places won't accept this copy as The Official copy because it isn't processed by the state after the ceremony.  You will need to request an Official copy after your wedding from the county.
    Posted by emarston1[/QUOTE]

    <div>  Huh really, cuz when I went to change my SSN I handed them that and they lady asked me some questions and that was it. So I need a different one to change my drivers license? </div>
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  • emarston1emarston1 member
    5000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_married-ladies-license-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:d4bf277b-9ff0-4826-9a0d-7749d982370dPost:7d9005d0-e3df-48c7-9754-d493a0d7a8b4">Re: Married Ladies - License Question</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Married Ladies - License Question :   Huh really, cuz when I went to change my SSN I handed them that and they lady asked me some questions and that was it. So I need a different one to change my drivers license? 
    Posted by lovetruly06[/QUOTE]
    Maybe Maybe not.  As you can probably see from this thread there are varying answers as to how different offices handle it (and enforcement of it.)
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_married-ladies-license-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:88Discussion:d4bf277b-9ff0-4826-9a0d-7749d982370dPost:362864e9-8525-487e-b17b-e38bd8f24abc">Re: Married Ladies - License Question</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Married Ladies - License Question : No, BoAmerica is telling us that each branch has its own set of rules regarding deposits and what they'll accept, so they can't give us a blanket statement about what they need - but that it's likely that we'll need the original certificate.  <strong>When we called individual branches in order to lock down which ones might deposit the checks without it, they all gave us a bunch of lawyerspeak - like they were trying to protect themselves in case of getting sued later.  None of them were willing to state definitively that they'll accept the one we signed at the wedding - or even that they'll accept the official one.  </strong>DH spent literally 20 minutes on the phone with one manager, having this conversation: DH: "So we can deposit the checks if we have the one we signed at the wedding?"  Manager: "It would help if you have some official document with you."  DH: "So we need the officlal wedding certificate?"  Manger "Some official document would help."  DH: "Is there any other document that would count as official?"    Manager: "Not that I know of."  DH: "Okay.  So if we bring the official marriage certificate, you'll deposit the checks?"  Manager: "It would help."    DH: "Well, what do you mean, 'it would help'? Do I need something else?"  Manager: "Not that I know of."  DH: "So if we bring the certificate, you'll deposit the checks?"  Manager: "It would help."    DH: "Okay, I need to know for sure that you'll deposit these before I drive all the way out there.  We probably need an official document, and there's nothing else you know of that you require.  So if I bring the official certificate in, WILL YOU deposit the checks?"  Manager: "Well, it would help." This is the point at which DH hung up.  We decided that since he was leaving for his business trip anyway, by the time he'd gotten  back we would have received the official certificate and we'd go in and try to get this sorted out.  Now that he's back, we're jumping in.  Sigh.
    Posted by matuofm[/QUOTE]

    So you haven't gone in and actually tried it?  Honestly, I'd just go in to your nearest branch and give it a shot with the copy you have.  The worst they could say is no, and I doubt too many of the tellers would know to look for an official/unofficial copy. 

    I'd just go in and say, "We just got married, and I haven't had time to change my name, but I'd like to deposit these checks.  Here's our marriage license if you need to see that in order to deposit them." and leave it at that.  I'd guess that for a lot of them, that would be enough.  If not, you'll just have to wait for the real thing, I guess.
  • matuofmmatuofm member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_married-ladies-license-question?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:d4bf277b-9ff0-4826-9a0d-7749d982370dPost:dbc525b0-8477-42cf-a0e8-53b1424a9994">Re: Married Ladies - License Question</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Married Ladies - License Question : So you haven't gone in and actually tried it?  Honestly, I'd just go in to your nearest branch and give it a shot with the copy you have.  The worst they could say is no, and I doubt too many of the tellers would know to look for an official/unofficial copy.  I'd just go in and say, "We just got married, and I haven't had time to change my name, but I'd like to deposit these checks.  Here's our marriage license if you need to see that in order to deposit them." and leave it at that.  I'd guess that for a lot of them, that would be enough.  If not, you'll just have to wait for the real thing, I guess.
    Posted by abbeylynne06[/QUOTE]

    We went in this afternoon, actually.  The rep listened to our explanation and then firmly told us that we'd have to get the official copy, THEN get my new SS card and driver's license, and THEN come back. Politely tells us goodbye and sends us on our way.  Until a second rep comes over, asks what was going on, and listens to our story. At that point, rep #1 (who was clearly the senior rep) takes the checks, looks them over, looks at the unofficial marriage certificate and my old driver's license, and then says that he'll initial each of the checks and then we'll be able to deposit them immediately. 
    ??? 
    Oh well.  At least it's taken care of now. 
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  • edited December 2011
    Yeah, I didn't change my last name, and we got several check made out to Mr. and Mrs. HisLast.  The banks needed both our endorsements on them, but since there is not actually a Mrs. HisLast, I found that funny.  I scribbled something incoherent on each, and let my H deposit them.  Banks are weird.
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