Kinda WR! What do you think??

acaponi87

http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2011/12/14/study-number-of-u-s-married-couples-at-record-low/?hpt=hp_c2

^
Read me! Short, but interesting.

emarston1

I heard about this on the today show.  I think it's pretty standard for people to wait longer to get married now a days so it makes sense that there's a drop.  DH and I are the only ones of our friends that are married.



Plus you can live in sin and not be judged by anyone except your FMIL.  Oh wait, just me?  Ok then.

Allycat11

I am really not shocked by that information at all.  As Liz said, people are waiting to get married...women want established careers, more people are preparing to move for jobs in their early to mid 20s and don't want to commit to long term relaionships and living together prior to marriage is more socially acceptable.  My parents struggled with the idea of me "living in sin" but they got over it.  If I am independent from them, they have no say in where I live (finances were absolutely a deciding factor when we chose to move in together before we were even engaged).   With the divorce rate as high as it is, that also leaves more adults that are not currently married.

DH and I are the first of our friends to be married and we are 24.  I have 11 cousins on my mom's side of the family (including my brother and myself), we are all between 24 and 33.  The older ones in their 30s were mostly all married between 23 and 25.  Most of them are just now starting families (also a huge culture change in the last few decades).  My cousins around my age seem to be getting married later, the other 2 that are 24 are unmarried with no sign of marriage yet, same goes for one who is 27 and my 29 year old brother. 

ETA: My best friend has been with her boyfriend for a few years and they have known for a long time that they plan to get married. They are also paying for their own wedding and won't get married until they can have the wedding they want.  I think a lot of people are waiting for similar reasons. Traditionally, in our culture, the bride's family paid for the wedding, which allowed people to get married right out of college. Now, at 22-23 people are thousands in debt from student loans, can't find jobs and if they want to get married, they have to find a way to afford it.

Milsey32

I'm not surprised at all, but I am somewhat saddened by it. 

Like Ally said, I think there are oodles of people out there wanting to get married but waiting for the right time/money/etc. My sister and her boyfriend (soon to be FI... shhh!!), for example, have been together for 6 or 7 years and have talked about marriage and yadda yadda yadda. Well... they've already been invited to SEVEN weddings next year in 3 (or 4) states and my sister is in 2 of them (she was asked to be in 3 but one bride had the nerve to ask if she was going to lose weight for the BM dress..) so financially/mentally/physically that would be difficult to plan around all that. 

However, I know that nowadays it's normal to live together and do the dirty deed before marriage so marriage doesn't seem necessary. To each their own, but I admire my grandparents who had been married for over 70 years and still loved each other the day my grandma died. I love the old fashion idea of married parents, a couple of cute kids, and the family dog. Today SO many families are "blended" (step-parents/kids, half-siblings, unmarried parents, single parents, etc). I can't really judge, but at the same time... I wish it wasn't that way :-(

Suzette70

Interesting!  I'm 41 and FI is 40 - he is the last of his friends to get married.

The Last Man Standing

and I was/am fine with living in sin.  lol  

entropicbeauty

I'm 27 and have "lived in sin" for over 2 years with FI before we decided it was time to get married and it almost 100% had to do with our financial situation because we are mostly paying for the wedding ourselves. Before we were even dating he was telling people I was the girl he was going to marry, so I think the money/job factor really does play a huge role in these statistics shifting so drastically.

Sue-n-Kevin

Suzette, I got you beat...........I was 56 when I got married for the FIRST TIME
Of course by this age, I've "lived in sin" with more than one lucky guy, heh heh heh.

I grew up in the 60's and 70's. In the 60's everyone got married young, they got divorced in the 70's and 80's. In the 70's unmarried women found "empowerment" and didn't have to marry to "have it all". Not only did I live in sin, I also (horrors!) had 2 children without the benefit of marriage. They are more well adjusted than most of the kids I know who come from unhappily married parents......... I raised them the way I saw fit, supported an actual HOME/HOUSE and them, and didn't fight with anyone on how to "do it the right way", ie discipline, etc. It's not easy, and not for everyone, but it worked for me.  

My son is 24 and has had a new galpal for about 6 months. I met her at Thanksgiving. She doesn't see herself getting married until she's about 30.......something he agrees with. They are burdened by college loan debt, live in a very expensive part of the country (Washington DC), and want to have security before they marry. I think this is very smart. It's not just the cost of the wedding either; it costs over $100,000 to raise one child (I think that stat is from a few years ago), and that does NOT include college. The middle class has been decimated by unemployment, and people with jobs are under-employed in jobs that pay less than they used to. And raises/merit increases? WHat's that?

It's not a very romantic picture, but it is what it is. I think it's very wise for people to wait, and with reliable birth control and only verbal commitments to stay together until things get better, it just makes sense.

Sue's history lesson and advice is now closed.

Milsey32

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_kinda-wr-think?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:e3643304-1b67-4cf8-8747-54f585a1af19Post:0e2fe613-0eae-48b2-b0e9-869852a5cff9">Re: Kinda WR! What do you think??</a>:
[QUOTE] Sue's history lesson and advice is now closed.
Posted by Sue-n-Kevin[/QUOTE]

<div>This is like telling Charlie that the Wonka factory is closed... you can't do that Sue!</div>