No one said it would be this overwhelming...(kinda long, sorry)

ryncat74

Any other brides to be out there who never really dreamed about her wedding day before? Sure, I've had random day dreams about that day, but nothing that ever really stuck with me. I used to think I wanted an outdoor beach wedding, which would be great, but the fiance hates the beach. So, here I am, trying to figure out what the heck I want and its overwhelming.

I also think all of these Wedding shows on tv makes me feel pressured to live up to what everyone expects a wedding to be. For various reasons (cost, not the primary one) we have decided that we would like an afternoon wedding. I feel like it will give my guests the option of NOT having to rent a hotel room and stay overnight. A 3 hour drive home to NJ is not as daunting at 5pm as it would be at 11pm.  Most of our relatives are older...and I feel as if its being considerate to a portion of our guests whom deserve the most consideration. As soon as I mention the notion of an afternoon wedding to some people they make a comment about how its kind of cheesy. (Am I allowed to immediately cross them off of the guest list ). Anyone else having an afternoon wedding that could give me a pep talk?

We are going to look at The Pok Grand and Belvedere mansion this weekend, I'm hoping that will give me a little boost in mood about planning a wedding. Fingers crossed...I'm open to venue suggestions, or comments on the two I'm looking at this weekend.
Thanks in advance...
Cat

Principesa3103

I did not have an afternoon wedding, but I did have a Sunday wedding which some people including my husband were not too fond of, but in all reality...it is your day and when other people get married they can do what THEY want...whoever wants to be there will make sure they are there regardless of the time, place, etc. Don't stress it too much, try to enjoy the process as much as possible!!!! Hope it helps

sdana924

 MY BIL had his wedding in the afternoon at anthonys anyone who wanted to stay continued the party at the hotel bar lol.  You can have your wedding any way you want to and if someone has something to say about it just nod your head smile and say " I appriciate your input we will put it into consideration" then make your own desicions. HAHA I have had alot of comments about my wedding from various people why aren't you wearing a white dress (its off white mind you) you need to have a full veil (its birdcage) children should be invited (theres about 20 kids under the age of 8 in both our families) theres no bar in the hotel (our wedding ends at midnight)
I just 'try' to shrug it off. Everyone has an oppinion.

Might I suggest the Grandview it is beautiful in the middle of the day wiht the Hudson and the bridge and the day time prices were not bad. We wanted to do the grandview but we wanted and evening wedding and they required to many people for us to invite.  Good luck

ryncat74

Thanks girls! I think I just need need to grow a thicker skin about this stuff. It's only been two weeks today since we've been engaged. I said I wanted to enjoy the engagement, but we want to make sure we have a place to get married next year, so the wedding planning process has begun.

We will look at the Grand view. The funny thing is, we live on the river in Beacon and have the most fantastic view and sunsets every night from our front porch. We have random strangers stop their car and stand on our lawn to look at the sunsets at least twice a week... So it wasnt on our "must have" list for the wedding because its part of our every day...lol.

Our plan was to have an afterparty, whether it be at the  hotel bar, or if we end up in POK at Shadows or something. This would be the "fun" party so to speak.
Thanks for listening and responding. I know its "our day" but we want people to enjoy themselves.

tsteger

If you do the afternoon, I feel like that sounds perfect for you situation.  You can always have an after party for the younger crowd and meet at a bar somewhere.  I would not worry about it.

littleluckypenny

You should read my post from a few weeks ago (Wanting to please both sides with reception time).  It sound very similar to what I was going through.  In a nutshell, FI's family is older and don't like to drive at night/early birds, my side is the opposite (younger, go to bed at 3AM type).  I personally wanted a time that the reception wouldn't end too early for my family, and still wanted his side to attend because it was early enough.  His side would be driving 2 hrs one way for the ceremony.  We decided to comprise (code word for make both sides unhappy ) and have the ceremony at 3 and the reception from 4 til 9.  That way his family can leave early if they want to and enjoy some of the reception, and my family can party with part of the night.  It's still too early for my tastes, but hey, it runs with daylight and ends with some nightime.

bscprez

i could have written this post myself!  my FI and I live in lower dutchess country and most of our guests will be coming from NJ.  i have this guilt complex about people having to stay in a hotel too.  and i still care too much about what everyone else thinks (gotta get over that!)  i figure that we'll do everyting a little earlier so that the reception is over early enough that some people can drive home if they want.

in the end you want to make sure you're happy and F the rest of them!

oh and p.s.  it's so nice to see someone else is on here from the beacon area!!

Bride2be110511

How funny, I am from Beacon... as well... and I am going through the same thing!!!!!! I thought I wanted this big wedding, and then decided I didn't want to go the cookie cutter route. I wanted something more laid back. So after changing my mind, and just going to a big wedding last week, I now think I want a big wedding! UGH! Overwhelmed?? Oh yeah!
I heard the Belvedere was beautiful, but at least with the Pok Grand, you could take the shuttle bus down to Mahoney's and/or Shadows, for the after party. Etiher way, do what makes you feel good.
I was concentrating on everyone, but myself, and that just made me cancel everything. Now, I don't even know when our "new" wedding will be. *Sigh*.
Goodluck!!!

ryncat74

Wow! So much love from Beacon. We have decided on an afternoon wedding, and we are 95% sure that it will be at The Grand. We have a date penciled in...we have 10 days to decide. We are going to look at Chalet on the Hudson at the request of a good friend who got married there a few years ago. Anyone ever been to a function there? Or looked at it for themselves? From what we were told they work with a hotel in Fishkill to help with shuttling. We'll see....the date we have penciled in for the Grand is actually not the original date we had planned on getting married, but we weren't set on that anyway...I'll keep you posted!
Where is everyone else having their receptions?

Bride2be110511

That is funny, all of us from Beacon. We probably see eachother, and don't even know! LOL. Which date did you pick? FI and I are still mulling it over... we aren't sure where or when, for sure... but we are thinking POK grand, or Pamela's on the Hudson. (If we do something on the smaller scale.) Date will either be April or October 2012...
You'll have to let us know where you chose!!!

suzannejv

I saw the title of this post and had to read it as I got engaged 2 weeks ago and looking for a venue is very stressful!!  I am from Mnahattan and my fiance is from Riverdale- so we want the westchester area.  We looked at about 5 venues thus far and we liked both the Ritz Carlton (gorgeous but pricy) and Doral Arrowwood.  I like the hotel feel so our friends from the city can stay there for a weekend- but am also concerned about others driving.  Its going to be a Saturday night in November, so scenery is not a huge issue.  We looked at Tappan Hill as well, but its too vintage for us.  Does anyon have ideas of places- or has been to weddings at Ritz or Arrowood?