9/11

hughes1231

Anybody getting married on Saturday 9/11?  Thoughts?

LoveAdopted

I don't think it's a bad thing to get married on that day, however it will be on people's minds, and they might be talking about it at the wedding. Not a great deal, but can make you feel a little somber and may/may not affect the overall mood. I don't think I would choose that date.

MeaghanandMichael

I think you need to know your crowd and know if there are going to be people who would truly be upset going anywhere on that date. For example, one of H's gm lost his dad in 9/11, so we just couldn't do that.

That being said, I think carrying on with the joys of life is one of the most patriotic and respectful things you can do on a day we remember many fallen Americans. I would never give the side eye to any one wanting to be married on that day.

megandjay

I don't think I would choose it, but I doubt anyone would judge you for choosing it. Unless, like Meaghan said- guests lost someone on that day.

lnarey

I think Meaghan said it best.  I don't think anyone would think badly of you for picking that day, but only you know your guests.

BostonBride919

We were just invited to a wedding on 9/11, and we certainly questioned the choice in date when we recieved the invite. Not to sound harsh, I honestly assumed they must have picked it to save money. Because I don't think anyone would pick this date if there were others available unless there was some other reason involved. just something to think about - When guests recieve an invite or STD they will go through the same discussions.

And your anniversary each year will be associated with a day that everyone else recognizes for a completely different reason.

But you probably can get some great deals, and as pp's said - We really do need to move on and have positive memories associated with 9/11 as well. If we cancelled out every day something negative happened, we'd run out pretty quickly good luck!

CCBelle

I agree with the PP's.  My sister's birthday is 9/11, and she still feels a bit funny going out for a celebratory dinner, etc.  She tends to go out on a different night than the actual day.  It's just such a somber day w/ such terrible memories that I would have a hard time having it be my wedding day.

Knottie6cd98948dcce890b

My FI is a Boston fireman and although not directly affected by the tragedy that is 9/11, we decided the date was totally off the calendar.

9/11 affected many people in the boston area - some we know about ando thers we don't. Also, 9/11 basically started the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, which was caused much hurt for many families. All of these people, including myself who has friends serving overseas, are affected by 9/11 on a daily basis.

If you are able to sty away for the day, I would. I know I always wake up on 9/11 with a pit in my stomach.

megandjay

I have to change my opinion, because when I first saw the title of this post, I thought it was going to be something sad. (when I just logged back on now, I got the same sinking feeling, but I didn't register it before).

So I think other guests might involuntarily feel that way too, and you don't want guests to feel that way before they get to your wedding. I still doubt anyone would judge you or be offended (unless, again, they were personally and closely affected by 9/11), but you probably don't want a kind of sad cloud over your special day either.

Karen's MOH

Unless it was truly the only date you could get-- which is totally possible given it's only 7 months away-- I don't think it would be absolutely awful, but I wouldn't want to do it. I don't think people would judge you, per se-- though Bostonbride has a good point, I probably would wonder whether it was the only date available or to save money-- but I just wouldn't want to celebrate my anniversary that day. I would probably move it back as much as a few months to avoid it if need be. Then again, my whole family is from NY.

jthennigar

To each their own, but I would not choose this as my date.  Just wouldn't feel right.  A wedding is supposed to be a time to celebrate, and celebrating on this day would always be called in to question.

Laina384

My good friend from college is getting married on 9/11. She knows the feeling that that day might bring for some people. She's thinking of a way of incorporating a moment of silence during the ceremony.

She's getting married at a winery in Connecticut and that was the only date available in the month, and her and her FI really wanted to get married there.

I'm rather neutral on the decision. I will definitely go to the wedding and we'll just see what the atmosphere is like.

Krystalynne21

Well, my feelings are kind of mixed.  Would I personally do it? Maybe not.  Would I look down on anyone who decided to get married that day? No.  Every day of the year has the potential to be a devastating day to at least one person.  One of the clients at work told me that my wedding was doomed because 7-23 is the anniversary of her accident.  I know 9/11 is clearly a much larger scale that than, not comparing at all.  However, although it is a clearly historic event, it won't have the chilling effect in the decades to come.  The bombing of Pearl Harbor was a devastating US event, but people still get married on 12/7.  The WTC bombing in 1993 was on 2/26, but people still get married then.  If thats when you want to get married, and its okay for the crowd you are entertaining, do it.  In 15-20 years, it will be a known historic event, but I doubt people will "frown on you" for choosing that as your wedding day!

AlexaGrant

I think it's a little different because the entire event is captured by that one date and the numbers 9-11 will always be associated with the attack.  It's not like Pearl Harbor which we don't refer to as December 7th and many people probably couldn't even remember the date it happened.  Just hearing or reading the words "September 11th" is jarring and can be off-putting to people finding out about a wedding on that date.  But when the date comes, most memorials and rememberances are done in the morning so as long as you give people enough time to observe the day it could be ok.  Unless, of course, you have people who were more deeply affected by the day and are still in mourning.  Tread carefully. 

jquirke9881

Personally I would not choose that date.  To each their own, though and I would not think any differently of someone who did choose that date.