• Images
  • Text
  • Find a Couple + Registry
GO
Massachusetts-Boston

Vendor Posting Opinion

I know people are against the new vendor posting rules (obviously). As you know I have spoken to Annie about all of this, and right now, it doesn't look like anything is going to change. My question to all of you is, why do you care what a vendor thinks about what you have to say once your service is over. I can understand waiting to give a review about your photographer and your videographer since their service extends months after the wedding is over and you don't want to bad mouth them before they make your album. The reason why I don't really care about any of this (or think it's that big a deal) is the fact that once you've had your wedding there's really nothing a vendor can do to you if you leave them a bad review. So what, you think their service was crap and they think they are the best ever. We leave a bad review in a post, they have their rebuttal and the only thing that's left is for another bride to read it and decide for herself whether or not she believes the vendor or the bride.I've heard a lot of ppl mention that they think that brides are going to hold back their true feelings because they are scared that the vendor is going to read it. What exactly are you scared of? What do you think the vendor is going to be able to do to you that will change anything?I apologize if this came off a bit snarky (I didn't mean for it to.) I am just really curious why this all matters so much to everyone. Post your opinions here. Thanks! Hopefully I will be able to bring this back to Annie and have them reconsider the new rules.

Re: Vendor Posting Opinion

  • edited December 2011
    Reasons I do not like the new policy: 1.  It encourages vendor lurking 2.  Posts are locked after the vendor rebuttal.  The poster can obviously start a new thread to continue the vendor convo, but why should the poster be forced to do that? 3.  The forums are for brides planning weddings.  If we want to get the vendor's opinion on his own company, we would have asked him for it.  We want opinions from actual brides. 4.  And my biggest complaint is that the vendor rebuttal can be used as a free advertisement for the vendor.  Did you read the DJ rebuttal????
  • edited December 2011
    Hey Shag - I totally get what you are saying, and I don't think you are being snarky. I, for one, could care less of what a vendor thinks of me after the wedding is over. I actually don't care what they (or anyone) thinks of me now, haha! My concern isn't really the vendor review issue, because as you said, once your wedding is over, there's nothing a vendor could do to you. What I'm concerned about is the RANTS/RAVES. Newly engaged girls come on this board to solicit honest advice from us on our dealings with vendors - if vendors can post on those threads (ex, the jenwindy incident) - and then they lock the post, no one gets to offer their opinions. AND, the vendor uses it as free ad space to appeal to the bride inquiring about their services. I just feel that a lot of girls my not want to offer advice to the new girls about vendors they had dealings with, and that's one of the main purposes of this forum. Many new people to this board don't go through every person's bio looking for reviews on vendors, it's easier to simply post to get a quick response on someone specific they are looking into. We should be able to express why we did or did not book someone without suffering a (potentially) childish rebuttal from an irate vendor.
  • shagadelk7shagadelk7 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I definitely agree that the DJ thread was basically a free plug for his business. I was thoroughly surpised that Knot Annie allowed that to go through.
  • edited December 2011
    Me too - that post seemed to work against everything they were trying to accomplish, I was floored they let it through. I think if they screen the posts more carefully, we may not have any more incidents. We may be making something out of nothing. I just feel the entire policy defeats the whole purpose of these forums. Like fool said, we are brides looking to talk to other brides, honestly and openly. I'm not here to read free plugs from vendors who are really only hurting themselves. I could understand this policy, if for example, we had a crazy bridezilla on here that no vendor could satisfy. If she went around saying "he wasn't on time!" or "she didn't deliver what was promised" and those claims were untrue, and the vendor wanted to comment SPECIFICALLY to those charges (I was on time or I gave her everything the contract stated and more) - I could get it. But that's not what goes on here. If vendors are upset because people are consistently giving them bad reviews - they need to look at WHY. We all know that's not going to happen, based on the jenwindy incident (that's what I like to call it). I also don't like that, as fool also mentioned, it encourages vendors to lurk on our boards. We all know they do, I even got called out by one of my vendors once (who was nice enough to call me to discuss my concerns), but it's uncomfortable to engage in debates on a public forum over what is supposed to be a professional business transaction. It's one thing to whine to other brides who are going through the same thing, it's another thing to involve people who aren't strangers... (if that makes any sort of sense...) I'm getting so long-winded here... sorry!
  • ema220ema220 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I haven't posted in awhile but I happen to notice this issue when I popped on last week.  The one thing I really wanted to point out is that this is the INTERNET.  Of course vendors are going to lurk on here, it's public information.  If you are concerned about others seeing what you are saying, you really shouldn't be posting them on a public forum on the internet regardless of whether or not vendors can post.  The knot is a widely known website, and I would expect that many vendors check these boards for feedback on their services.  If you post a negative comment in reviews, respond negatively to a rant/rave, etc. you should know that it is very likely it may get back to these people and you need to be ok with that before posting it here.  I guess I agree with Shag that I don't really see what the big deal is, except that I do think Annie needs to do a better job at screening so vendors can only post once to defend themselves against an accusation.  I also don't think the post should be locked, but the vendor shouldn't be allowed to post beyond the 1 time on each topic.
  • shagadelk7shagadelk7 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I couldn't agree with you more Ema. I just look at this board as the INTERNET. Yes, it's nice to know it's a place you can say what you want. But be realistic, if you were a wedding vendor there's no way in hell you don't know about TK. If I was a wedding photographer in the area the first place I would go would be the Boston board to find out a) what ppl are saying about me or b) what ppl may like about other photographers and how I can provide a better service to my clients. Whether or not vendors are allowed to post doesn't make much of a difference. Vendors lurk. They see what everyone is saying. I think bottom line, what needs to happen is Annie needs to really look at the vendor rebuttal and ask whether or not it's actually replying to a real issue a bride had or whether it's a free advertisement as was the DJ post.
  • jamidandedbjamidandedb member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Well, as a former bride, I don't really care....but thinking back to when I was planning, I think vendors posting on here rebutting their bad review can potentially hurt another bride.  So say Photographer ABC got a bad review from me, unprofessional, didn't deliver final products, etc....Photographer ABC came on here, said "well I was professional, I delivered what was in the contract" etc etc.  Another bride books with him based on his rebuttle, and got screwed over as well...and I (the former bride) also started receiving scathing and harrassing emails from the vendor as well.  Personally, I think it can open up a can of worms....but at the same time, there is also "two sides to every story."  I don't know...I just don't think that it should be allowed.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • edited December 2011
    I honestly think we're all in agreement on this - we may just be using different words to express ourselves. So we're going round and round in circles a bit here.
  • edited December 2011
    I agree with Jamie and erilou 100% here. No need for me to say the same things as them.  
    image
  • edited December 2011
    Shag, you hit it on the nail.  This IS the internet.  People are free to join TK and read and post whatever they please.  If vendors are given this freedom, then the threads should be kept UNLOCKED so that the OP and other brides have the freedom to rebut the vendor rebuttal.  Why should the vendor have the last word?Also, vendors have many opportunities to find out what clients think of them.  Half of my vendors mailed me a survey form after my wedding.  I gave them honest responses that will hopefully help them.  They do not need to lurk on TK to get the same feedback. 
  • edited December 2011
    I don't like the idea of locking/unlocking a thread after a vendor has posted. That is just asking for a screaming match between everyone. Of course I know vendors lurk here. If I was a vendor, I might too to help my business. But I don't like the idea that they can post. I want an honest opinion from a client, not an advertisement from a vendor. If I wanted that I would go to the vendor's website and not to TK.
    Marieke & Michael 5.14.10 Loving life with our 2 boys Anthony (3.22.08) and Dominic (due 2.14.11)!!!
  • edited December 2011
    I don't have an issue with vendors lurking on the Knot. In fact, I think as a vendor, you'd be an idiot not to. I also don't have an issue with a vendor disputing a bride's account of his or her services. It's a public internet forum, and we should be willing to stand behind the public claims we make or otherwise find a way to convey our experiences more privately (i.e. email). I would prefer that it not devolve into venue for thinly veiled vendor ads. I agree that thread should remain unlocked for all to post on, bride and vendor alike, as long as the issues being discussed are those specific issues related to a bride's review that a vendor felt the the need to clarify.
    image
    Wedding Date: January 16th, 2010

    image

    Cycle #5: BFP on June 14, 2011 -- Due Date: February 23, 2012 -- Born: February 26, 2012
  • kates2480kates2480 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
     the fact that once you've had your wedding there's really nothing a vendor can do to you if you leave them a bad review.they email you, like a DJ did to jen and ask for $$ for the business that was lost! absolutely ludicris!
  • shagadelk7shagadelk7 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Yes, they can email you. Big deal. You delete the email. It doesn't accomplish anything. Are you scared of having an email sent to you? It's not like that DJ email held any water. He made himself look like a moron by doing that. If you are confident enough to post something on the web about a vendor (regardless of where you post it), you should be able to take the fact that they might come back to you and have something to say about it.
  • edited December 2011
    Shag, I feel like a lot of us wouldn't be as upset if you had given us advance warning of the new rule.  Apparently, the new rule has been posted on the moderator board for the last month or so.  From our perspective, the new rule was instituted pretty abruptly in the form of a horrible and tacky vendor rebuttal, followed by Annie's locked post.  If I remember correctly, you were MIA from the board the day this all went down.It seems like you are sincerely interested in our opinions, but at the same time, you have said yourself that the rules are here to stay.  We've posted our opinions, and you continue to "not get it."  I know we all wear big girl pants, but it's offensive when a vendor engages in harrassment whether on the forum or in private messaging.  It shows that maybe sometimes, vendors should not have as much power. 
  • hapark11hapark11 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Honestly, when this was initially brought up, I found it off-putting, but I wasn't outraged.  And with time, I have decided that I really don't think it's such a big deal.  I won't spell out all of my reasons, as most of them have been mentioned.  Any vendor that gets on here and pretty much does or says anything, in regard to a bad review or a thinly veiled ad, is really only sabotaging themselves.  If you decide to write up a bad vendor review, and you give a fair, accurate, and in depth account of what happened, then I don't really see a big issue with locking the post after the vendor replies.  Your side, their side.  On other review sites, when a vendor replies, the reader is generally able to tell from that response whether the vendor is decent (or sane), and can form an opinion on the entire matter.  Of course this isn't a 'review' site, but if you post a review, well... And I also don't feel like any of this even comes up enough to warrant as much discussion as it has received.  Bottom line is that it's probably a matter of legalities for TK and nothing we say or think is going to change it, realistically. 
  • shagadelk7shagadelk7 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    FFF, clearly I care or I wouldn't be asking your opinions on this matter. I am also playing devils advocate here to make everyone see where the knot is coming from (since it doesn't seem like anything is going to change anytime soon). It was posted on the mod board as well as our board so I didn't think I needed to reitterate what was already in Knot Annie's post on our board.  Let me ask you this. Assume the knot didn't exist and instead it was the norm for brides to create blogs/bios about their wedding planning. Say you put up all your vendor reviews, good and bad, and vendors could see whatever you posted and proceed to contact you however they saw fit. Would you still do it? The Knot is acting like a middle man at least. If anything does happen between you and the vendor at least there's some sort of mediator (depending how well Knot Annie decides to sort through the vendor rebuttals). With any new implementation there's going to be kinks to work through. From reading the moderator's board, (and from Annie's emails to me) we seem to be the only board that has a problem with it. The main reason for this, I think, is because we happened to have our first experience with a nutcase vendor. So far other boards have not had to deal with anything like this. I've relayed all your feedback to Annie, and basically all I got from her was a 'sorry you feel this way.' I told her ppl were planning to leave the board and that didn't seem to make one bit of difference. I am sorry FFF if you feel slighted by all this, but I am really trying my best to get through to Annie, but it doesn't look like anything is going to change. I really think that the DJ thing was an isolated incident and chances are they are going to be better about posting vendor rebuttals.
  • edited December 2011
    Let me ask you this. Assume the knot didn't exist and instead it was the norm for brides to create blogs/bios about their wedding planning. Say you put up all your vendor reviews, good and bad, and vendors could see whatever you posted and proceed to contact you however they saw fit. Would you still do it? The Knot is acting like a middle man at least. If anything does happen between you and the vendor at least there's some sort of mediator (depending how well Knot Annie decides to sort through the vendor rebuttals). Yes, I did post reviews on my weebly site.  I would love it if my vendors contacted me about my reviews - good and bad.  I do not believe Annie and her team are acting as altruistic middlemen - they are looking out for their bottom dollar.  To say otherwise is completely disingenuous.  If they want to be mediators, there needs to be some sort of dialogue between at least 2 parties.  That's the definition I'm familiar with.  When the post gets locked, there is no further mediation.   The "case" gets settled.The fact of the matter is that vendor ads are not allowed on this board.  The purpose of the rule is to avoid having biased opinions and sales pitches.  Maybe the DJ incident is not the best example, but it's the only example I have to go by.  In that specific rebuttal, the vendor never addressed the actual issue at hand - i.e. the fact that 2 brides were put off by his aggressive sales pitch.  Instead, it became as you called it, a free plug.  However, b/c that post was disguised as a rebuttal, it was allowed to stay.  I'm not sure why I'm even engaging this convo.  It's moot until we see what happens with the next vendor rebuttal.  hopefully by then, Annie's team will do a better screening job. 
  • richkatmrichkatm member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Honestly, I see both sides of this issue but what puts me off is the fact that there's a posibility of the vendor harrassing a bride (like Jenwindy) after a bad review or comment. Not that they can't anyway but I think it opens the door for much bigger issues. BUT from the TK and vendor point of view I'm wondering if it's a legality issue such as defamation or libel. Any way...I think we're beating this topic to death.
  • kates2480kates2480 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'm just glad my wedding is over. the DJ example shows harrassment, I think it's unacceptable, and it looks as though TK is standing up for these people, but whatever.I think if vendors can advertise, knotties should bring back their links to their etsy, mary kay, etc shops! If it goes one way, it should go the other!
  • bubbleteabubbletea member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I just don't want the knot to waste my time.If I click on a post because a specific vendor is up for discussion among the brides - I want to read that discussion. Not just what a vendor wrote and then it stops. Makes for a bad forum, plain and simple.And just to be crabby:In general, I just don't like these stupid kind of rules. It's a bride forum. Done. Easy. Everybody knows what they are getting. I don't think allowing vendors to post is going to make it better. So when asked what the big deal is - to me, it's why is the knot making a big deal over something unnecessary and making all sorts of rules around it? Thanks for asking what does it matter if a vendor posts on here, because in terms of the big picture I don't think it will matter if they do - so why let them?. All it does is change the tone of this forum which is bad for you guys as a business.And since The Knot likes rules, why can't there be a rule that the boston board is exempt from this rule if the majority ask for it? Again, what does it really matter?
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards