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Shower invitation etiquette question?

KatelynnRoseKatelynnRose
First Comment
in Massachusetts-Boston
Hello,  I have two questions regarding shower invitations:

1.)  Do you find a lot of ppl are putting "regrets only"?  I feel like I want to know definitively who is coming so I would want them to respond.  What do you think?

2.)  Who do I put as hosting the shower?  It's all the bridesmaids plus the mothers.  Do I put everyone?  Any suggestion on the order of names?

Thanks in advance!
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Re: Shower invitation etiquette question?

  • october010brideoctober010bride
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011

    1. Depending on who is hosting, they should say how people rsvp. Ask them if they want everyone to call, email or just the no's. Either way you should be able to have an exact amount before the actual shower.

    2. Have them design the invites. In most cases, when its the moms and the bridal party, usually the moms are first and then the bridal party. But remember they should be designing the invites... not you.

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  • Karen's MOHKaren's MOH
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I definitely would have everyone RSVP, not just the nos. When I hosted my sister's shower I had to follow up with a lot of people who ended up being nos, and if I just assumed they were coming I would have had to pay for a bunch of extra food.

    I didn't list who was hosting it at all. It was awkward because my mom was paying for it, but they say moms shouldn't host because it's like the family asking for gifts... I think that is all nonsense, but we just had my name and phone/email to respond to.
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  • LoveAdoptedLoveAdopted
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    1. I would ask for everyone to respond with yes/no.

    2. If your bridesmaids are doing a lot of the work, and the mothers are less involved, I might put the bridesmaids names first, MOH (or main organizer first) then alphabetical, then the mothers' names. I know that etiqquete states that the mothers shouldn't be hosting the shower but if that's who is hosting, then they should be listed.
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  • megandjaymegandjay member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I just ordered some, as the MOH. However, the shower is at her aunt's and her Mom is paying for the food and stuff, and the other bridesmaids are helping me with favors/cake. I really couldn't list 8 people on the invite (it seemed kind of silly), so I didn't list a host/ess. But I did put my email and phone for the RSVP.

    I would say- no host and def include RSVP!
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