Guest list gone wrong

Shan36RN

I have invited way over the amount of guest I want to attend. I know some may not be able to make it due to living out of town. My fiancé invited some of his co-workers who he says never attends weddings but, gave them a STD anyway. Should I rely on ppl not being able to make it or can I cut it even after sending STD's?

AddieCake

If you sent someone an STD, you need to send them an invitation. Otherwise, what were they saving the date for?  You should never invite more than you can afford to host or that your venue will hold, and always plan on 100% attendance. 

Shan36RN

Thanks Addiel for the advice.

cbrown828

I am a little unclear- have your invitations already gone out or just your STDs? My advice to you is the same either way, but if you have only sent STDs you have more time to adjust your plans. Everyone who was given a Save the Date needs to be invited- the time to cut your list down was before these went out. Your out of town relatives and friends may decide this is a perfect time for a trip- don't discount them before the RSVPs come in. It would be best if you could find a way to accomodate everyone. I don't know if that means finding a bigger venue or just adjusting your "vision," but if they got a Save the Date they are now on your invite list.

Simply Fated

Yeah, what Addie said.

Even those that live out of town might still come. People tend to use oot weddings as an excuse for a mini vacation or a mini family reuinion.

Shan36RN

I have thus far only sent my STD, my venue is fine it holds 300 I'm way below that. My plan is to send everyone I sent a STD an invite I wasn't pleased with my fiancé's decision to invite ppl he says aren't going to attend, based on their history of not attending other colleagues weddings. I truly understand what you ladies are saying, and have factored them all into the budget.

Simply Fated

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_guest-list-gone-wrong?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0700b42d-e22e-4c4d-8804-c9f204f57821Post:398dda57-52c6-4ed7-bfab-bae3cb94b8fd">Re: Guest list gone wrong</a>:
[QUOTE]I have thus far only sent my STD, my venue is fine it holds 300 I'm way below that. My plan is to send everyone I sent a STD an invite I wasn't pleased with my fiancé's decision to invite ppl he says aren't going to attend, based on their history of not attending other colleagues weddings. I truly understand what you ladies are saying, and have factored them all into the budget.
Posted by Shan36RN[/QUOTE]
I have the worst luck and my wedding would be the one these colleagues decided to attend lol.

mlg78

Shame on your fiance...and don't let your fiance near the invites if he's going to willy nilly hand them out like he apparently did with the STDs.  You really need to decide on a firm guest list before ANYTHING gets sent.

Viczaesar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_guest-list-gone-wrong?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0700b42d-e22e-4c4d-8804-c9f204f57821Post:0ab144e2-1b2c-4812-b1b2-55ad06974a0a">Guest list gone wrong</a>:
[QUOTE]I have invited way over the amount of guest I want to attend. I know some may not be able to make it due to living out of town. My fiancé invited some of his co-workers who he says never attends weddings but, gave them a STD anyway.<strong> Should I rely on ppl not being able to make it or can I cut it even after sending STD's?</strong>
Posted by Shan36RN[/QUOTE]
Neither.  You cannot cut people to whom you have sent an STD, and you have to plan for 100% attendance.  You should not have over-invited in the first place, but it's too late to rethink now.

Jen4948

It's never a good idea to "plan" for less than 100% attendance.  If you've sent anyone an STD, you need to follow up with an invitation.  I'd make sure that your FI understands that.  Just because these co-workers haven't attended weddings in the past doesn't mean that they can be cut from the guest list if he gave them STDs.  And he'd better not invite anyone else verbally.  Same reason.

Shan36RN

Yes simply Fated lol I feel the same way.

Shan36RN

Your right Mlg I have to watch him. Never even thought about the verbal invites ugh! What a mess...