Please tell me if this is ok, orshould I do it another way?

coopsbaby

First, let ,me apologize since I've taken my ambien already and may ramble, skip details, etc.

So, fi and I are having an intimate, immediate family only wedding and dinner in Las Vegas next year. We will be having a big casual famiy/friends BBQ type party 2 weeks later, with no wedding-type things. Just food, music, fun,drinks, etc.

Here's the question- our chapel airs our wedding online live, and then for 3 weeks afterwards so people can view it if they wish. I'm trying to decide whether or not to make friends/family aware that it will be there.

My initial instinct is to not, since it seems a bit like "You're not important enough to come, so watch the fun from afar" or something.

On the other hand, I would totally want to watch if it was my friend, cousin, or something. I'm sure our mothers would spread it around a bit, and I don't want anyone to feel put out.

So, should I spread it by word of mouth, put the info on the wedding announcements, add it to our wedding website, or just not tell anyone unless they ask? I'm half tempted to put a link on my facebook after we get home, but that seems so juvenile and tacky. 

Everyone I tell will be invited to the BBQ if that makes any difference.

Thoughts? Observations? Thanks much. You guys are always so much help!

mkrupar

I don't think it's a big deal to tell people about it. People have DWs and stream the wedding live for friends & family back home. If you don't feel comfortable telling people about it before hand send them an email of FBPM afterwards with the link.

Or put it as an insert with the BBQ invitation.

JaxInBlue

My first reaction was your initial instinct so I like the idea of telling people about the link after the wedding; to me, that's no different that a couple sharing their wedding video or photographs.  I'd e-mail the link to those you wish to share it with after the wedding and perhaps have it playing at your barbeque.  At the same time, if you have immediate family who fall into the category of invited to Vegas but can't accompany you, I don't see a problem with providing them the link to watch in real time. 

chattychiqa

Is it at all possible to play it in the background at your party?

mizutamababy

I would send it to the people you invited, but can't come out.  For the others, let word of mouth do the work for you so you can't be faulted if someone does happen to feel like they weren't good enough to be invited.

I don't disagree with PP on it being like wedding videos/photos... but at the same time I probably wouldn't show off my photos to someone who wasn't invited unless they specifically asked to see them.  That just may be me, though.

tanyanubin

You're already sending wedding announcements and having a BBQ. It's really no different. I think people would enjoy it, and no one would have to watch it who wouldn't want to.

StephBeanWed61502

I'm going to go with "use your judgment" in deciding who to tell.  Great Aunt Mildred who can't travel?  Absolutely, let her know.  22 year old cousin who's still kind of snitty over the fact that she wasn't invited?  Probably not a great idea to tell her, since she's likely to take it the wrong way.  Also, letting the moms spread it by word of mouth is a great idea - it takes the decision out of your hands, and then it's coming from a place of "OMG we're so excited our babies are getting married" rather than "OMG you should watch my wedding you weren't invited to" (not that that's actually what you're saying, but if someone's inclined to get offended over it, that's how they could hear it).

rebarobert2012

It's really up to you.  I don't think it would be a big deal either way.  I'm sure that the people who want to watch it would and the people who don't won't.  I would probably only watch it if it were a close family member or a close friend.

ceh789

I would definately not go the Facebook route but your other ideas seem fine to me.  I would probably add it to the website and spread via word of mouth and leave it off of the announcements just because you'd have a crowded announcement adding all that info.

Starqueg

Just beware that sometimes those links fail to work.  My friend got married in Vegas years ago and people tried to watch it live and it never came on. 

divinemsbee

When my Mom got remarried her and her now husband did this. My brother and I were both in college, and my sis was in high school, so it was just them. I watched it with the sound off in the school library, and then later that month one of my Mom's friends threw her a little party and we re-watched it. It was sweet. I go with use your judgement, but if it's a small family affair there, then I think people will want to watch.

coopsbaby

Thanks guys. Glad to see my instincts on this were pretty good. I think I'll only tell people ahead of time who are invited but can't make it , and others can hear by word of mouth, plus I'll add it to the BBQ invites. We don't have any elderly relatives, or pissy cousins or anything, so we should be covered. Thanks again! Knew you guys wouldn't steer me wrong!