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Wedding Etiquette Forum
esb55005
member
Engaged Women and Bouquet Toss?
I have some weddings to attend coming up, however, all of the weddings I am attending the couples became engaged after me, but my wedding will be after theirs. My question is, do engaged women participate in the bouquet toss?
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Re: Engaged Women and Bouquet Toss?
[QUOTE]I was at a wedding last weekend and tried to stay uninvolved with the bouquet toss (much like I always did before I was engaged). The mother of the bride told me I had to participate! I reminded her I am engaged (my fiance was actually at another wedding and wasn't there with me) but she said I had to go. I figured it was easier to go stand on the edge and "try" to catch it than annoy her, but in general, I'd say stay out!
Posted by lisabeats[/QUOTE]
This exact thing happened to me at a friend's wedding a couple months before mine.
[QUOTE]Nope. Engaged women (or any woman that doesn't want to participate for that matter) doesn't participate.
Posted by manjermj[/QUOTE]
This
Bleh. Why I'm not a fan of bouquet tosses. I'd stay out and I do unless someone obnoxious pops up. Then, I just pretend to *try* and catch it.
June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
Girls with boyfriend/girlfriends participate... and honestly until the vows are said and the papers are signed, those girls are no more 'single' than the girls who happen to have more jewelry.
I thought the person who catches it is "the next to get married." It makes more sense that an engaged woman would catch it than not....
Are ONLY those with no SO's supposed to get up there?
If not, could someone explain the rationale between people with boyfriends being 'single' but people have a ring but still aren't married, aren't?
ETA: I'm not staunchly arguing for engaged women to participate. Just sharing my experience and genuinely curious about the rationale.
[QUOTE]Weird. Every wedding I can even remember being at, engaged women try for the bouquet. Girls with boyfriend/girlfriends participate... and honestly until the vows are said and the papers are signed, those girls are no more 'single' than the girls who happen to have more jewelry.<strong> I thought the person who catches it is "the next to get married."</strong> It makes more sense that an engaged woman would catch it than not.... Are ONLY those with no SO's supposed to get up there? If not, could someone explain the rationale between people with boyfriends being 'single' but people have a ring but still aren't married, aren't?
Posted by aurianna[/QUOTE]
I think so, and I think it depends on the social circle also.
Of the weddings I have gone to, the bride/DJ tried to cajole all the single women up to catch the bouquet. Since I was in a long term relationship, I did not consider myself single. In my mind, not married does not neccessarily equal single.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
[QUOTE]Weird. Every wedding I can even remember being at, engaged women try for the bouquet. Girls with boyfriend/girlfriends participate... and honestly until the vows are said and the papers are signed, those girls are no more 'single' than the girls who happen to have more jewelry. I thought the person who catches it is "the next to get married." It makes more sense that an engaged woman would catch it than not.... Are ONLY those with no SO's supposed to get up there? If not, could someone explain the rationale between people with boyfriends being 'single' but people have a ring but still aren't married, aren't? ETA: I'm not staunchly arguing for engaged women to participate. Just sharing my experience and genuinely curious about the rationale.
Posted by aurianna[/QUOTE]
I always felt as though the "who's next" idea was "who's next to get a ring on their finger", so I played along until I was engaged and then bowed out since I already had the ring. I had people during that year try to tell me I was still single and should go out, but each time I had at least one other engaged friend/relative who was taking the same stance and we sat it out.
As PPs have pointed out I don't believe anyone should ever be forced to participate, but if I was setting the "rule" on who is "supposed to" I'd say over 18 and not engaged/married. JMO
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Personally, I think anyone who wants to participate in it should. It sucks to have all the single women at weddings singled out, and no one should be forced to stand up there.