Any vegan/vegetarians/gluten-free-ers out there?

jlkenned

hmmmm. Ok, I won't swear off vegan baked goods forever then. I will keep an open mind. If you know that your friends and family like the vegan cake, then that's awesome.

kaesha

FWIW, I've been to several vegetarian & vegan weddings and as long as the food tastes good and there's protein in there somewhere, I don't miss anything. Now, you won't fool anyone about not having meat by serving pasta. If their bodies are used to eating it, they'll notice it's not there. But, if your focus is on showcasing fantastic produce, and having interesting food, that certainly goes a long way. I'm far more interested in having something interesting and different than the same old wedding fare.

karma007

Moslty vegan, always veg here. As far as the ethics behind what to serve, I personally think that if you would serve a guest meat in your home that's fine, but if you would not, don't do it for the sake of the wedding. As far as what vendors can do for you, I don't know what you're up against, but don't cave to please anyone else. We're having a RD in Vegas, and I had some trouble findng a place where I could get more than a salad. I settled on Canaletto, where I can get pizza or pasta. Our cake isn't vegan (for FI- he is an omni with something specific in mind), but that's for him, not our guests. As far as your meal, being the bride, whatever vendor you choose should accomodate your needs in particular. Your guests can choose to eat, or not eat, whatever you serve. I'll be interested to see what you decide!

airidh80

I agree that vegetarianism can be based on a system on personal moral beliefs, and those beliefs are perfectly valid.But I still don't believe that the comparison to religious food restrictions is valid. There's an enormous difference between "I don't eat meat because I believe it's wrong to do so," and "I don't eat meat because it's offensive to MY GOD."I agree with most of the PPs that you should offer one meat option; and as long as your caterer can guarantee there will be no cross-contamination, you should offer gluten options as well (if your caterer refuses to make that guarantee, then, well, gluten-free it is. I think the bride has the right not to vomit on her wedding day

fangsiting

I think one reason that people are so upset about the idea of not having a meat option is that they think vegan food doesn't taste good.  If it's made properly, it tastes good.  If people are enjoying the food, they won't care what it's made of.  I'm not a judgmental vegetarian.  I don't care if people eat meat--I just want to show them how delicious vegetarian food can be.  If everyone ate a little less meat, it would be better for the environment.  I obviously lost this battle with my fiance--I'm not having a veg wedding either because of cultural differences with FI's family. There will be fish served at my wedding, but I don't think there is anything rude about a vegetarian serving vegetarian food at a wedding. 

lyndausvi

To be honest I think DH, myself and most of our friends would be more disappointed at a vegan wedding than a vegetarian wedding.  We all love cheese. No dairy on top of no meat would be a real bummer.  We all love pasta with cheese, cheeseboards, etc.  Of course DH's favorite meal is plain cheese pizza.

airidh80

Yeah, I'd be fine a vegetarian wedding. FI would not. He would b!tch and moan and generally be a PITA. But neither one of us would like a vegan wedding very much. And I've had several vegan meals, at restaurants deemed "good" by my very well-educated vegan friends. It's just not for me.

karma007

Oh, and on vegan cooking? Yes, some of it sucks, but then, even meat or dairy dishes can suck too. Terrible cooking isn't diet specifc, just poor talent or lack of imagination. Vegan baked goods in particluar can be incredible, if done properly. Same thing with frozen desserts. Some soy icecream is awful, but then just about anything by Purely Decadent is amazing. Please don't confuse vegan food with health food (b/c not all of it is).

lyndausvi

If it's made properly, it tastes good.This is very subjective statement.  A Kobe beef stake made properly tastes good also.Some people just have different tastes than others.  It just is.  Example I hate curry. The smell of curry actually makes me sick.  I also can not eat spicy foods.  I find a lot of ethnic foods are just out for me.  Not because they are vegetarian, because I do not have a pallet for certain spices.Even if it is cooked properly I still might not like it because of other reasons other than it being veggie.

lyndausvi

or how about a Kobe beef STEAK a kobe beef stake might not taste too good..

ffmaid

No Meat No Dairy No bread Honestly all I woudl liek at your wedding would be alcohol and even that you probably have only limeted types ( although vegan wine is fine) Fake pasta ( gluten free) fake meat, fake cake Seriously if you can not eat gluten and will not eat dairy at least don't pretend it is dairy and gluten and serve say italian ice for dessert do not serve pretend cake ( cake with no flour, eggs, butter,milk, ect well all that is left is cocoa)

fangsiting

Obviously if you don't like the ingredients, then you won't like it.  But assuming someone likes the ingredients and the chef puts together a thoughtful, well-prepared meal with fresh ingredients, then it's probably going to taste good.  My point is that you shouldn't judge vegan food based on some flavorless pasta dish or mushy tofu & rice entree.  Just like I'm sure non-veg food shouldn't be judged by the rubbery chicken that is so commonly seen at weddings. 

lyndausvi

That's my point also.  A lot of people surprisingly do not like vegatables.   Sad or not that is just the truth.  So no matter how well the chef prepares the dish some people will not like it.  So if you know you have a bunch of meat-eatting Texans coming to your wedding, I do not get why you would not give them some fish, chicken or at the very least some sort of dairy.

fangsiting

There are no meat-eating Texans invited to our wedding. 

ffmaid

I hate this double standard. Vegitarians firmly think that no reception should ever not include a vegitarian or vegan food choice. But then you do not offer the same respect to omnivorous guests. You should know how awful it is to go to a dinner and have noting you can or will eat there. why woudl you treat your guests that way. Particularly guests who have gone out of their way to accomidate your food choices in the past.

BecW2be

This post isn't about your wedding, fang. It's about answering jbwed1's question about her wedding. That's the point PP was making.

lyndausvi

OP - my DH is a chef and has to deal with gluten-free and/or vegan dishes and it's not an issue. It's a PITA, but doable (living on an island has it's limitations if given short notice.)  Although for large groups it's normally one or two people he makes special dishes for not the whole group.   As far as a vegan cake he has that outsourced to a really good Vegan cake maker on island.Pricing is up to the venue.  I would imagine most places will not charge more than normal meat entrees and most likely less than a meat option. 

lyndausvi

There are no meat-eating Texans invited to our weddingnot your wedding.. The OP's wedding does.

fangsiting

Oh, I just noticed that the OP said her family was from Texas--I apologize.  I thought that was a random example.  I'm just trying to encourage her to have the vegetarian wedding she wants.  If you think it's wrong to eat animals, then I think your close friends & family should respect that. 

punkyb2b

I think wedding guests feel entitled sometimes.  Seriously, going one meal without meat isnt going to kill anyone.  If the OP and her FI dont eat meat because of how they feel about animals, why should they forget about their beliefs and serve plates of meat?  Its just as valid a reason as religion. OP- I suggest talking to your caterer and see if you can get a tasting of fulfilling veg options, making a vegan cake for you and FI, and a regular one for guests.  Good luck.

wadingmoose

I've had fantastic vegetarian food.  I've had OK vegan food.  I've had horrible meat based food.The reality is I've had much more (quantity and quality) horrible vegetarian food than I have meat based.  Which is pretty impressive for someone that isn't a vegetarian, wouldn't you say?I'm certain that me saying "But beef and chicken taste soooo good if properly prepared!" doesn't change how you feel about eating it.  Why should "But vegetarian food properly prepared is fantastic!" make any difference to someone who isn't vegetarian?In the end, you're forcing your dietary beliefs on those who are closest to you.  I'm sure you'd be miffed if they did that to you.  And I know, you guys are the ONLY vegetarians in the world who don't really care if there are veggie meals prepared at events you attend.  I can tell you the vegetarians I know are miffed when they get handed a garden salad while everyone else is eating fantastic hot foods.  They shouldn't be expected to carry food for their dietary needs.  A proper host - which is what you are when you're throwing a wedding - takes their guests into account when planning the event.  To do anything else is rude.I'll honor your wishes and provide a vegetarian meal even though I'm not vegetarian.  Don't you think it's a little rude not to do the same for others?  Why force your beliefs on your guests?

airidh80

Fang, OP's family has ALREADY proven that they respect her and FI's decision to not eat me (see her comment about her family making an effort to eat "like them".)What we're saying is that by serving only vegetarian and vegan items, she's proving that she does not respect her family's choice to eat meat.

fangsiting

Eating meat is not a belief system!!!  You cannot disrespect "meat-eating".  It's a like vs. dislike thing, not a moral thing.  You can eat all the cows in the world if you want.  You can even eat them in front of me.  But do not ask me to kill that cow for you and serve it to you.

jerseylaw21

Am I the only one who has noticed that the OP hasn't written anything? Unless I missed it, if that's the case I apologize.

ffmaid

Meat eating is no less a belief system then not meat eating I view eating meat as a tasty source of food. I also understand that cows and chickens would not have expanded around teh world had it not been because their flesh is tasty. Eating meat allows for the survival of species that would if not favored with tasty flesh that we eat have died out. Notice that nobody eats eagles and as such there is not fiscal incentive to raise eagles compaired to say chickens. Had eagles been tasty and able to be sold for their food value then people would have raised eagles and we woudl have a much larger eagle population. Eating animals provides a market that allows for species preservation and raising. Fish farming for example is preventing the loss of several fish speciesSo I view it as a moral good for the animal kingdom if people eat a variety of meat and dairy.  

momofayden

Unless the couple has to kill the animal themselves for my meal, i would expect some sort of meat/fish option to be offered at an event.  I can do vegetarian which is what the OP stated but now she is stating vegan....I would not be ok with that as a guest.  There should be a compromise.  Many meateaters can do vegetarian for a meal but expecting them to go vegan is not fair.  That's like expecting a vegan to eat a steak at a meal and providing nothing else for them to eat.  I have had a vegan cake and it was not good so you'll probably only have to get a little small one since no one is going to eat it. which will save you money.

xlizellx

i think you should do a vegetarian reception because its what you believe in. as for the allergy, i would make sure an option was available as one of the food choices that met your criteria. you don't need to eat ALL of the food options i'm sure. but i HATE when vegetarians have non-vegetarian weddings. do you invite people over for dinner at your house and cook steak? no, you wouldn't. this is just a much bigger dinner party.

xlizellx

ffmaid, that is one of the dumbest things i've ever read.

ffmaid

Well if you think it is so stupid at least consider the point before you judge . More cows ,chickens,goats, ect are alive because people eat meat then would be alive if nobody ate meat.  If everyone in the US was a vegan there would be almost no cows chickens goats, lambs, in the US. There woudl be no inovations on how to keep these animals healthy. The care and numbers of many many species of animals in the US is directly related to their usefullness as pets or as food.    

ac_in_dc

ffmaid, I strongly recommend you read some of what Michael Pollan writes on this subject. Yes, more cattle are alive b/c we eat them, but at the expense of countless other species.  The same thing happens with plants FWIW.  See http://www.michaelpollan.com/article.php?id=41