Wedding Etiquette Forum

approach dogs' owner?

I'm coming to you ladies because it's the fastest way I know of to get responses from a variety of people.  And I know there are lots of dog lovers here.  In the interest of full disclosure, I am not a dog lover.The guy who lives across the street leaves his two dogs (corgis, if that matters) outside all day, every day, in all weather.  They bark incessantly--at everything, anything and nothing.  The barking is, obviously, incredibly annoying.  Is there any good way I can get this guy to train his dogs?  He's a big, muscular guy who, quite frankly, I'd be nervous about approaching.  I know he knows about the barking because he is home sometimes while they are barking.I know it's passive aggressive, but I have left two notes before.  Very polite, asking him to please train his dogs.  Any further suggestions?  Is there any polite way of doing so?  As a dog owner, how would you want to be told that you suck as an owner for not properly training your dogs?!Sorry to post and run, but I have to pick my mom up from the airport.  Thanks for any suggestions.
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Re: approach dogs' owner?

  • I was going to suggest starting with notes to avoid a face-to-face confrontation, but since you already tried that, I think you should file a complaint with AC.Have you talked to your other neighbors about this to see if they have attempted talking to this person?I assume the dogs are in an enclosed area, but they still should not be left out all day unsupervised. If they are not in a fenced in yard, and just on a tie-out, that is against the law here so you should check with your city or county.
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  • If you have a housing association you could report him to them.
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  • Also, to answer:As a dog owner, how would you want to be told that you suck as an owner for not properly training your dogs?!This wouldn't happen. Clearly he doesn't care, and he probably doesn't want to hear how he should "train" his dogs - if he cared about training he would have done that in the first place. In addition, this isn't so much of a training issue as an irresponsible dog owner issue and unfortunately that is difficult to change.G/L.
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  • id report him to animal control.  excessive dog barking can fall under disturbing the peace.
  • I'd report him.  Leaving dogs outside all day is cruel.  Corgis are also "inside" dogs if you will, due to their size.
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  • as a barking dog owner, I would suggest talking to him calmly face to face.  I had a naked lady yell out her window this week at me and I was unthrilled.Chances ARE that there is a noise or nuicance barking ordinance in your town/county.  Look into that.  But just because your neighbor gets fined, doesn't mean that the barking is going to stop.I would be more concerned about the health and safety of the dogs than their barking. 
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  • There are bark control devices that send out sound frequencies dogs are sensitive to and it teaches them to stop barking. You can't hear it, but any dog within the specified range will. It won't hurt the dogs, just give them a nasty ear-full when they bark. You don't need your neighbors permission, just set one up and give it a try. They aren't all that expensive either. Google "bark control devices"IMO, it's a better option then confronting your neighbor and telling him he's a lousy dog owner. You can't tell people what to do or how to treat their pets. GL
  • Yes the yard is enclosed and they are not tied down. No HOA--it's just a residential street. Thanks for clarifying about not really being able to train them. As I alluded, I know nothing about caring for dogs. Maybe animal control is the way to go? If nothing than to scare him?
  • I would call Animal Control and tell them that your neighbor keeps his dogs outside all day no matter the weather. The barking is secondary, honestly. Do they have shade? Enough water? He is not a responsible pet owner.
  • Maybe animal control is the way to go? If nothing than to scare him?And, like Ivy & Georgia said, to ensure the welfare of the dogs.
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  • It's definitely not recommended to leave your dogs outside full time.  Any humane society or vet will tell you that. Unfortunately, I doubt there's any law that would back that up. I'd give it one more shot with the neighbor before notifying the authorities.  He may be big and burly, but you're a girl, he has to be nice to you as long as you're nice to him. Say the dog's barking keeps you awake and prevents you from getting work done.  Call your local animal shelter and see if they have any suggestions before speaking to him.I moved in to a small apartment with my Labrador a couple of years ago, and he had a tough time adjusting to the comings and goings of other tenants outside the door.  He barked incessantly.  A citronella collar helped to train him not to bark.  They're humane and have something like a 90% success rate. Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like your neighbor would spend $200 for 2 collars if he treats his dogs like crap.
  • I would be more concerned about the health and safety of the dogs than their barking. If the dogs bark day and night in and out...I'd be more concerned about my own health. That would drive me absolutely bat shiit crazy. FAST.
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  • You know, I'd really hesitate before calling animal control.  Maybe it's just me and because I'm on the other side of this battle, but I know I personally would much prefer my neighbor asking me nicely to work with them than a cop showing up on my door step.Like you said, notes are passive agressive and you can't train a dog if you aren't home.  Since another neighbor talked to us calmly, we have made efforts to try to curb their barking.  Our dogs don't even bark continuously, but we respect that our neighbors live there too.Seriously, you need to look into the ordinances and see what the laws are before you talk to him.  The ONLY reason why I would call animal control is to report neglect.  You might want to check into those laws too.
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  • If you feel the dogs are neglected, then yes, please call animal control to get someone to check it out. But if they have shade, food, and water, then there is nothing you can do. If animal control thinks the dogs have what they need, then you are still stuck with the barking.No matter how much you beg, or how hard their owner may try to train them, the dogs will still bark if they want to. It will be hard to 'train' them out of it if they've been acting like that their whole lives. You can't blame your neighbor for their barking. My dogs bark all the time no matter how hard I try. Sure I can yell them or smack them (lol don't take that like I'm a crazy animal abuser)...but they still do it. What happens if you call authorities? Will they take the dogs and put them in a shelter or something? I don't know how it works.
  • Ivy, I agree completely. AC should always be the last resort if it just a nuisance issue, but as a responsible dog owner, it angers me about the owner leaving them outside. And, OP- maybe your FI should talk to him.
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  • jf, I think what happens if you call AC depends on where you live.  Here you get fined like crazy.  They do have the power to impound, but usually only do that for strays, unlicensed dogs and aggressive dogs.I've also had a really hard time training my dogs to not bark.  We don't use collars because my FI doesn't believe they are humane.  Dogs bark for different reasons.  Ours are excitedly territorial.  But I have heard that some dogs bark incessantly because they have been left outside.  That may be your case. 
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  • Ivy, have you tried the citronella spray collars? they're def. more humane than shock collars. I tried it out on myself before using it on the dog. The only drawback is that the batteries run out quickly and are expensive to replace ($10-15) and run out if you forget to turn the collar off. I only use it when I absolutely have to.
  • I'm actually shocked that people think animals shouldn't be left outside all day.  If properly cared for with shelter and water provided, they should be fine.  In fact, they're animals.  Historically, they live outside.I have a lab.  He is significantly happier when he spends his days outside.  We fill a kids pool with water for him, he has plenty of shade and doesn't bark at all.  The barking is a training or separation anxiety (still training) issue and is completely unrelated to where the dog is.That said, I'd have my FI approach the owner.  We're struggling right now with a family behind us who leave their dogs outside all the time and they bark constantly as well.  It's an issue - particularly when it continues past 10pm.  Of course, these people also put a toddler out on the deck unsupervised so I'm not holding my breath that talking to them will be effective.I'm very tempted to just call city bylaw and make a report.  They're home when the dogs are barking and do nothing to curb it at all.  Unless they're deaf, they should be doing something.  If the dogs were quiet while the owner was home, it's a different story.  But they aren't.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
  • I'm actually shocked that people think animals shouldn't be left outside all day.I guess it's different in Florida where the temperatures got up to 110 degrees last week. 
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  • I'm sure it differs depending on where you are. The point I was trying to make though was that reporting the noise won't make it stop. Maybe the guy gets fined. That won't do anything but tick him of. So then the OP would have barking dogs and a large, angry neighbor. My dogs are mostly inside but they all bark like freaking idiots at EVERYTHING. Someone comes in, someone leaves, something makes a loud noise, the wind blows, the tv makes a weird noise, etc. I guess technically they are my parents dogs. Mine and FIs puppy is just a doofus. She doesn't bark much. She just spends her time destroying furniture and eating the carpet off the floor. We're working in that....
  • Moose: I don't have super-strong feelings on leaving a well-cared for dog live outside most of the time, provided he's getting adequate attention and stimulation. FI's parents leave their lab outside in rural Colorado all of the time. I had a lab/chow mix in NC about 10 years ago that slept in the house, but lived outside (with a doghouse, shade, water, etc) when we weren't around. When you adopt a dog from the animal shelter, though, they're pretty adamant about not keeping them outside. It may be worth looking in to why if you're concerned, but if your dog is happy and well-adjusted, I personally wouldn't worry too much (other folks may feel differently).
  • Ah, yes.  In Canada the heat isn't so much the problem.  We don't leave our dog out in the winter, although we probably could for the most part.The shelters here haven't said anything about outdoors in the past.  My parents get all of their farm dogs from the SPCA and it's never a concern but that's probably due to a completely different environment.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
  • And really, people shouldn't use phrases like "Never leave your dog outside" when they're talking about their specific area and environmental concerns.  This board is international and covers many different climate zones.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
  • And the OP is in Boston, so Florida's weather would have zero relevancy.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
  • AC, thanks but we have looking into those collars and FI isn't willing to use them.  Wading, I did a little research this week and one cause that was brought up was leaving your dogs outside.  But it was attached to the dog wanting to be a part of "the pack".  So I think that fits in your separation anxiety piece.  jf, totally agree with your point. right on.
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  • And really, people shouldn't use phrases like "Never leave your dog outside" when they're talking about their specific area and environmental concerns.Who said this? I said:should not be left out all day unsupervisedandit angers me about the owner leaving them outside
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  • I'm trying to figure out why a dog needs to be supervised outside?  Honestly.  I'm not trying to be mean here, but it makes no sense and just isn't supported by my experience at all.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
  • Kind of off topic, but if your dog is watered and shaded and weather is not extreme, isn't being outside during the day better than being crated?  At least it gets exercise and some stimulation that way. I have friends who crate their dogs all day while they are at work and that seems worse to me.  But I might be wrong....
  • Wading, I wouldn't leave my dogs outside unsupervised, but that's because I have crazy dogs.  If they are outside, I will do things in the kitchen which overlooks the backyard, but I won't venture away because they can be unpredictable.At FI's parents house we do have an outdoor kennel that has shelter and they love to be out in the kennel.  I think is more of a case by case basis.  You need to think of lots of factors (the dog itself, the environment, the neighborhood, etc).  As long as it has the essentials and is clearly a happy and healthy dog, I'm good with it.  I think a lot of the pps felt based on the OP that the dogs were neglected and that's why they (and I) jumped on that particular bandwagon.
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  • I said that before the OP had responded about whether or not the neighbor's yard was fully enclosed.In my experience, neighbors have left dogs outside unattended in unsecured backyards. This has led to:-Other dogs getting in and starting fights-The dogs able to get out and attack neighborhood cats and children-I believe there was a poster a few weeks ago whose neighbor left their dog out back and the dog hanged himself with a choke chainI disagree with being outside unsupervised if the yard is not secure.
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